Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
I'm rather curious. Personally, I'm afraid to ctb due to fear of failure. My plan would be carbon monoxide, if that doesn't work water intoxication and if that doesn't work the night night method. I'm so paranoid about failing - that's the only thing keeping me here (my cat is 14 I'm also waiting for her to pass on as I don't want to leave her behind). Thanks for your input.
 
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W

wasted__life__23

Member
Sep 9, 2023
40
Fear of the pain beforehand, fear of failure and fear of the consequences of failure. I've dealt with the aftermath of failed attempts and the guilt, the lack of understanding from others is worse than the CTB experience itself. For me the next attempt will be Night-Night.
 
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Banshe

Banshe

She/her trans friend
Jun 28, 2022
53
Honestly I was before but I am certain enough in the outcome that Im no longer afraid
 
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WAITING TO DIE

WAITING TO DIE

TORMENTED
Sep 30, 2023
1,539
Yes, I'm terrified of failure.
My only chosen methods would be to use nembutal or jumping.
I like the idea of jumping because once you leap off the edge, you cannot possibly back out.
Also, jumping from a high enough elevation onto a solid surface will ensure a very rapid and guaranteed death.
 
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kilowatt

kilowatt

Guns don't kill people I kill people
Sep 9, 2023
377
Honestly, I'm not afraid I'll fail but I am a bit scared I'll pussy out or not be able to concentrate properly in my last moments. I'm working the best I can to prevent that but I doubt I'd be able to replicate the pressure and stress of the situation.
 
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P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
10,960
My method of choice is also CO. Currently I have no big urge to CTB soon but yeah, fear of failure plays a role.
 
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NocturnILL

NocturnILL

She will become the wind…
Sep 11, 2023
434
I'm not sure if it's fear but the idea of failing definitely crosses my mind a lot. The "what ifs" start to trickle into my mind. I've had failed attempts before but I'm pretty confident my next time will be my last time.
 
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Mauve87

Mauve87

Member
Aug 30, 2023
36
No I'm not worried about failing. I'm still here because I can't bring myself to traumatize my relatives

My sibling won't handle it well and I don't want him to suffer.
I hope I don't reach the point where I don't care
 
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S

SMmetalhead36

Ready to have my forever date with suicide
Oct 6, 2023
301
Sometimes yes, but I already told my closest friends and husband that if I fail and wind up on life support to just pull the plug.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
37,414
The fear of failure is what terrifies me, it's so inhumane how we cannot just leave this existence reliably in peace and even have to worry about this in the first place, I despise how it's purposely made so difficult to be free from this hellish existence. In general what traps me here is the fact that suicide method options are either inaccessible or risky.
 
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Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
The fear of failure is what terrifies me, it's so inhumane how we cannot just leave this existence reliably in peace and even have to worry about this in the first place, I despise how it's purposely made so difficult to be free from this hellish existence. In general what traps me here is the fact that suicide method options are either inaccessible or risky.
I agree 100%. If I knew my method would work I'd be gone (after my sweet girl goes). I'd finally have something to look forward to.
 
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ItsMeUnique

No beauty shines brighter than that of a good hear
Sep 28, 2023
28
Im afraid of failure. :aw:
 
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ewlife

ewlife

:(
Oct 4, 2023
51
My method is OD with percocet because I'm scared of more violent means. I'm terrified of the consequences of waking up and not only realizing I failed but being in excrutiating pain from liver damage. That's the main thing keeping me here.
 
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Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
My method is OD with percocet because I'm scared of more violent means. I'm terrified of the consequences of waking up and not only realizing I failed but being in excrutiating pain from liver damage. That's the main thing keeping me here.
I so understand how you feel
 
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nood11

Member
Jul 14, 2023
60
My method is handgun to the head. I'm scared of what the dying process would be like. I'm definitely scared to fail and be left in a vegetative state for an unknown amount of time. Lastly I'm scared of what awaits me in the afterlife. If there is a place of endless conscious torment, and I go there, that would suck bad.
 
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Morgengrauen

Morgengrauen

Sunshine Ward
Sep 10, 2023
99
Biggest point in my fear of failing is mainly being left with permanent damage that would significantly drop the quality of life. I've had more attempts then i have fingers in my life so the whole circle of getting admitted and shame from surviving isn't new nor threatening anymore. I'm also very lucky that the worst damage where mild nerve damage and phantom pain for years after attempting to slit my wrist. But the thought of waking up and either being physically bound to a bed forever or sustaining such a large amount of brain damage that i'm not even me anymore and incapable of comprehending everything is what's stopping me from doing anything more drastic and spontaneously.

And also the fear that it goes wrong and the process being unnecessarily cruel - even if i do get the relief of death in the end. It's certainly traumatising going through the horror that is an attempt that went wrong. from the pain and horrors ODing on pills while crawling around in your room begging for it to stop, fighting for your life to get out of the pitch black ice cold water at night after discovering the bridge you just jumped off was neither high enough to make you fall unconscious nor kill you but the rivers stream still being rather strong trying to suck you under the ice sheets, grabbing onto the rope for dear life trying to undo the knots because you missed the sweet spot that would cut off blood supply and make you pass out and instead are getting choked painfuly feeling your lungs burn for air etc....

I wouldn't wish this uppon my worst enemy. and after experiencing such things, the thought of reexperiencing this does fill one with fears that are hard to overcome. to dare to try hop on the bus again.

sorry for waffling and kind of missing the original toppic lol
 
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Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
Biggest point in my fear of failing is mainly being left with permanent damage that would significantly drop the quality of life. I've had more attempts then i have fingers in my life so the whole circle of getting admitted and shame from surviving isn't new nor threatening anymore. I'm also very lucky that the worst damage where mild nerve damage and phantom pain for years after attempting to slit my wrist. But the thought of waking up and either being physically bound to a bed forever or sustaining such a large amount of brain damage that i'm not even me anymore and incapable of comprehending everything is what's stopping me from doing anything more drastic and spontaneously.

And also the fear that it goes wrong and the process being unnecessarily cruel - even if i do get the relief of death in the end. It's certainly traumatising going through the horror that is an attempt that went wrong. from the pain and horrors ODing on pills while crawling around in your room begging for it to stop, fighting for your life to get out of the pitch black ice cold water at night after discovering the bridge you just jumped off was neither high enough to make you fall unconscious nor kill you but the rivers stream still being rather strong trying to suck you under the ice sheets, grabbing onto the rope for dear life trying to undo the knots because you missed the sweet spot that would cut off blood supply and make you pass out and instead are getting choked painfuly feeling your lungs burn for air etc....

I wouldn't wish this uppon my worst enemy. and after experiencing such things, the thought of reexperiencing this does fill one with fears that are hard to overcome. to dare to try hop on the bus again.

sorry for waffling and kind of missing the original toppic lol
Thanks for your input - much appreciated
 
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M

martinso67

All human rights are important
Feb 5, 2021
229
Yeah I am scared to fail because of the available methods, that I have. I also did fail one time with not a real lasting damage ( only a cut on my head, that's slightly visible now). But I am afraid of failure where I a vegetable (damage that affects my life quality, which already sucks or damages that make me disabled/ or half disabled). I don't want to fail and then have to depend on doctors or other people to survive. PLEASE NOOOOOO.

If I am free like other normies, then I would be not afraid. Also society (normies, not you guys) feed into that anxiety. But it will not stop me from trying. If there would be hell, If wish all "pro-lifers" that are denying my wish to die go there. No offence and I am not condoning violence. But you guys are evil though in my eyes.
My method is handgun to the head. I'm scared of what the dying process would be like. I'm definitely scared to fail and be left in a vegetative state for an unknown amount of time. Lastly I'm scared of what awaits me in the afterlife. If there is a place of endless conscious torment, and I go there, that would suck bad.
Shutgun when directed to the brain in the correct way (you can research that) is a 99% successful method. In the US (where guns are mostly legal) the number 1 method for successful suicide are guns. I am though NOT RECOMMENDING this or any method to suicide.
 
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razorblade

razorblade

Member
Aug 21, 2023
22
To be honest it wouldn't be the worse thing for me I mean I can always try again obviously I will have to wait

Also am really sorry but what's the night night method I haven't heard of that phrase before
 
Epikur

Epikur

Member
Oct 6, 2023
63
Of course I do fear failure. I experienced failure several times. This is why I am serching fo a really safe method. Perhaps even combine them. Next time I do not want to wake up any more.
 
StressedRedhead23

StressedRedhead23

Member
Jan 3, 2023
14
CO method for me. Just waiting on delivery of the items I need. Failure is in the back of mind but I've done the research and feel good about my plan but the what-if's do make me wonder.
 
Meditation guide

Meditation guide

Always was, is, and always shall be.
Jun 22, 2020
6,089
I'm rather curious. Personally, I'm afraid to ctb due to fear of failure. My plan would be carbon monoxide, if that doesn't work water intoxication and if that doesn't work the night night method. I'm so paranoid about failing - that's the only thing keeping me here (my cat is 14 I'm also waiting for her to pass on as I don't want to leave her behind). Thanks for your input.
1. Fear of failure
2. no place to do it, people around
3. Fear of suffering or choking when I try it
4.Fear of my SI wrecking my attempt
 
Someday_Somehow32

Someday_Somehow32

Member
Jul 20, 2022
90
Just kind of worried that if I fail I could possibly become even more of a burden to my family, or that I will be sent to hospitalization against my will.
I've failed a lot in the past, luckily, not enough to be sent to the hospital but my family and friends all know about it. I just want out of their hair.
 
sserafim

sserafim

brighter than the sun, that’s just me
Sep 13, 2023
9,012
I'm rather curious. Personally, I'm afraid to ctb due to fear of failure. My plan would be carbon monoxide, if that doesn't work water intoxication and if that doesn't work the night night method. I'm so paranoid about failing - that's the only thing keeping me here (my cat is 14 I'm also waiting for her to pass on as I don't want to leave her behind). Thanks for your input.
Yeah this is the only thing stopping me from doing it. Also, the risk and effects/consequences of failure as well. I would hate to end up with permanent damage, in that case it would've been better to never even have attempted at all. I'd hate to fail and be even worse off. My biggest fear is failing an attempt and ending up paralyzed or with brain damage or something. I'd hate to be a vegetable or stuck in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. I wish there were a method that was 100% guaranteed to be successful, with no risk of failure whatsoever. That's why I'm looking into VAS, that's sure to work.
 
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Lookoutbelow

Lookoutbelow

Jump to it
Sep 14, 2023
512
I'm not afraid of failure. I'm afraid of my head exploding as it hits the ground from 16 stories. But I'm more afraid of living so it's gonna happen.
 
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