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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
12,120
I've read of some people taking holidays before they CTB. I was just wondering whether there are places you would like to say a fond farewell to or perhaps just see for the first time before departing.

Obviously nothing specific to give away locations (although I guess we could be travelling to see them...).

Personally, I love the sea. I'd like to see that again before I go. I do like the idea of trying to enjoy the last moments here. Going to sound terribly cruel but I've sometimes pondered if- knowing when you are going to depart is an advantage. (Sadly though- I expect this would mean your health was rapidly deteriorating- so it might be impossible to really 'enjoy' things.)

Just think of the amount of people who just work and work and then drop dead before even retiring. If we knew when we were going, we could at least have a bit of fun before we did- for those of us who can still find a bit of relief here and there. (Guess this is more relevant for those of us who have no dependant children to worry about financially.)

Suppose the 'problem' is- it would involve likely quiting work- or not taking on anymore work and then rapidly draining what resources you do have. The problem would then be if you didn't go through with CTB (for whatever reason).

Bit of a random thread but I'd be interested to hear your thoughts. I realise this isn't going to be relevant for everyone. I know some people here are probably too ill to even contemplate this, so I'm sorry if it comes across as insensitive.
 
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almaranthine

almaranthine

Wizard
Nov 28, 2019
615
Similar to you, I wanted to visit the beach and pay for a hotel room with a balcony facing the water. I thought it would be peaceful to be able to look out into the water and listen to the waves and just be alone with myself on my last day. However, I have pretty much procrastinated and drained my resources by not working. My mental health was just so fucking bad I could not even handle cashiering at a grocery store and quit after a few days about 2 months ago. After that, I figured I would just drag myself along for a few months before I ran out of money. I'm almost out of money, waiting on my SN to come in the mail. I will probably not be able to afford the "nice" beach hotel room and will likely end up in a crappy motel if I decide this is the way I will go.
 
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LONE WOLF.

LONE WOLF.

PUNISHER.
Nov 4, 2020
1,990
I would just love to visit the Lake District in Cumbria again as it's a magical place to me and breathtakingly beautiful!
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,300
In my case I never really relate to when people say they find comfort in places. Only the thought of not existing is comforting to me. I will be glad to leave absolutely everything in this world behind, there's nothing that I particularly want to do, being in this world is very tiring to me and my experience of life has never been one that is enjoyable in any way.
I bet that many suicidal people wouldn't be suicidal in the first place if they had the ability to get enjoyment out of travelling and visiting places.
 
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universe

universe

Experienced
Jul 15, 2022
241
In my case, I should work but I am unable to. I'm on "vacation" because I'm expecting CTB in a few weeks but I don't do anything all day. Before the CTB became really concrete, I told myself that I should visit certain places near my home, take the opportunity to taste certain dishes, go see my relatives, put my affairs in order. It's a bit like what we imagine with films/books where the person who is going to die decides to take full advantage, to drop everything and go to the other side of the world.

In practice, I am unable to take advantage. I do nothing all day. I don't want anything anymore. As I don't want to live anymore, I don't want the positive aspects of life either. It's quite difficult to live, I imagine that it depends on the feelings of each person. The worst part is that if I miss myself, I put myself in a delicate situation. If I fail I will have to try again in the following week…

But it's good in a way if people are able to take advantage, I imagine that alleviates their suffering a little.
 
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makethepainstop

makethepainstop

Visionary
Sep 16, 2022
2,029
The British natural history museum
 
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LONE WOLF.

LONE WOLF.

PUNISHER.
Nov 4, 2020
1,990
I would also like to indulge in a trip around the UK visiting Agricultural and Military Machinery/Vehicles Museums including one last visit to see Concorde, Alas financial restraints make this idea highly unlikely barring a healthy lottery win! And l've more chance of dropping a solid gold 💩 than getting one of those,🤔.
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
12,120
I would also like to indulge in a trip around the UK visiting Agricultural and Military Machinery/Vehicles Museums including one last visit to see Concorde, Alas financial restraints make this idea highly unlikely barring a healthy lottery win! And l've more chance of dropping a solid gold 💩 than getting one of those,🤔.
Oh, cool. I saw the pre- production test concorde at Duxford airshow- that was pretty special. When I was young, we used to try and catch it flying over. Stunning plane. But yes, sadly dreams cost money. I used to go on coach trips quite a bit before the pandemic. Maybe you could still see a few of your cherished places. I love the Lake District too- good choices.
 
western_heart

western_heart

trying to save ourself
May 23, 2021
622
The ocean.

I used to live near the Pacific and would drive there whenever I felt like it (and was sober enough to do so). Now I am far away. I wish I could just get in my car and go (practically speaking the main thing stopping me is that I'd need to pack first and my health isn't the greatest for a long road trip)
 
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L

lemonhoney

Member
Sep 29, 2022
55
I've lost all interest in visiting places. I'll miss my home though, where my parents and sister live.
 
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Euthanza

Euthanza

Self Righteous Suicide
Jun 9, 2022
1,447
I plan to visit some countries before I die, never been abroad before so I guess it will be a hello and goodbye visits, maybe one or couple months for about a dozen cities, 3-4 nights each. I have had just enough to see my own third world homeland but I think in the end this is the place suitable for me to CTB alone, I have gathered my regimen here.
 
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patpat

patpat

Take me away
Oct 10, 2022
33
I'd like to go back to the US and see my dad's grave one last time. I never get a chance to be alone there cause I can't drive and I live in Europe now so I doubt I'll get to go back before I go.
 
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lessonlearned

lessonlearned

Member
May 23, 2022
86
i visited my old school from when i was a kid, for some nostalgia i guess..
 
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LONE WOLF.

LONE WOLF.

PUNISHER.
Nov 4, 2020
1,990
Oh, cool. I saw the pre- production test concorde at Duxford airshow- that was pretty special. When I was young, we used to try and catch it flying over. Stunning plane. But yes, sadly dreams cost money. I used to go on coach trips quite a bit before the pandemic. Maybe you could still see a few of your cherished places. I love the Lake District too- good choices.
@Forever Sleep l'm so pleased to read that you like the Lake District, it is such a beautiful place and near to where I was born, and just a mile from where l live now is the last Concorde to fly 'Alpha Foxtrot'. Yes Duxford is a very special place 👍 Concorde nmof 700x464 IMG 20220410 132303 983
 
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TheBroken

TheBroken

What Really Matters Anymore?
Feb 13, 2022
241
My old hometown .... just to drive around awhile and look. It'll be soon.
 
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S

Sad_Sack

Experienced
Oct 3, 2022
261
If I could get anything from visiting places that in the past meant something to me I wouldn't even want to ctb. For me to go somewhere like Yosemite where I used to love would just be an empty gesture and cause me increased emotional pain. I would feel absolutely no joy from it and it would, like so many other things to me, be like dangling a piece of meat in front of a starving dog and never giving it to him.
 
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Ai-chan

Ai-chan

I deserve nothing but the worst
Oct 16, 2022
54
I want to go to a place where I can truly be alone and at peace. A nice forest maybe.

Although I guess I'll be alone and at peace once I commit too
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
12,120
@Forever Sleep l'm so pleased to read that you like the Lake District, it is such a beautiful place and near to where I was born, and just a mile from where l live now is the last Concorde to fly 'Alpha Foxtrot'. Yes Duxford is a very special place 👍View attachment 100959View attachment 100961
Thanks so much for sharing- looks like you can look inside too? I was surprised at how cramped it was inside the one at Duxford. Still, what an incredible plane. Even more amazing to think it was designed in an era without so much computer input.

It also made me smile when I read you mention the Lake District. I nearly put it in my original post actually. My Grandfather came from Keswick, so I feel a special bond to the place- even though I've only visited it once. My parents used to go there a lot, so I guess I've grown up with it in my mind.

Sounds idyllic to have been born near there- if you grew up around there. Remember seeing children on a bus I took once and thought- what a stunning school run.

Been nice to chat. Honestly, I haven't been anywhere much since the start of the pandemic. It's nice to go there in my mind for a bit at least.
 
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O

old red eyes

Student
Aug 12, 2022
112
beachy head .....
 
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O

old red eyes

Student
Aug 12, 2022
112
one stone....i've been there in happier times
 
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Adamsnolife

Adamsnolife

Specialist
May 5, 2020
395
A quick Visit to London before heading off jumping from Beachy Head
 
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S

sevenkarmas

Student
Oct 10, 2022
170
I'm in the US, but would love to visit the UK again before I ctb. I had planned a trip with my wife to visit Wales, Yorkshire and Scotland. However, due to timing and costs, I will probably visit some national parks in the US southwest, and maybe make a trip to where I grew up and revisit those places before I go.
 
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WorthlessTrash

WorthlessTrash

Worthless
Apr 19, 2022
2,431
I want to go to South Korea, meet one of my favorite kpop groups and sight see. The problem is I don't want to go to another country alone and my friend can't go until next year, however I cannot last another year alive. I also have no money since I lent my mom my entire bank account in anticipation of my inevitable suicide.
 
Wannabehappy

Wannabehappy

Member
Nov 29, 2022
39
no. Every place I've ever liked brings back bad memories. Sad because I once wanted to and was able to, I had something to live for. I prefer not to go back to these places, it's enough that memories hurt
 
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