• UK users: Due to a formal investigation into this site by Ofcom under the UK Online Safety Act 2023, we strongly recommend using a trusted, no-logs VPN. This will help protect your privacy, bypass censorship, and maintain secure access to the site. Read the full VPN guide here.

  • Hey Guest,

    Today, OFCOM launched an official investigation into Sanctioned Suicide under the UK’s Online Safety Act. This has already made headlines across the UK.

    This is a clear and unprecedented overreach by a foreign regulator against a U.S.-based platform. We reject this interference and will be defending the site’s existence and mission.

    In addition to our public response, we are currently seeking legal representation to ensure the best possible defense in this matter. If you are a lawyer or know of one who may be able to assist, please contact us at [email protected].

    Read our statement here:

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC): 34HyDHTvEhXfPfb716EeEkEHXzqhwtow1L
    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9
    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8
Shadowplay

Shadowplay

Average life non-enjoyer
Sep 11, 2021
853
I'm curious to hear from you in revenge is the or at least a motive for CTB. Thanks!
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: LittleJem, patheticpartner and lobster salad
exhausteduntreatable

exhausteduntreatable

Member
Oct 8, 2021
80
It isn't the driver or motive but I must admit that I have considered the impact it would have on my abusive malignant narcissist mother. Considering the reaction she had to me cutting her out of my life for the past year I can imagine it wouldn't be good. I know people would consider me a heinous and probably evil person and nightmare of a daughter for even thinking this but I hope it hurts her even a little. She has hurt me so so much throughout my life.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: Venessolotic, Escapee, Ai-chan and 14 others
motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,081
I know people would consider me a heinous and probably evil person and nightmare of a daughter for even thinking this but I hope it hurts her even a little. She has hurt me so so much throughout my life.
I wouldn't consider you evil
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: Venessolotic, broken_songbird, markimobzzdeasui and 9 others
Rogue Proxy

Rogue Proxy

Enlightened
Sep 12, 2021
1,315
It isn't the driver or motive but I must admit that I have considered the impact it would have on my abusive malignant narcissist mother. Considering the reaction she had to me cutting her out of my life for the past year I can imagine it wouldn't be good. I know people would consider me a heinous and probably evil person and nightmare of a daughter for even thinking this but I hope it hurts her even a little. She has hurt me so so much throughout my life.
You're not "heinous," "evil", or a "nightmare" for thinking that. The bitch that forced you in existence and tormented you deserves all the suffering it can get. Anyone who throws that judgmental shit at you is a mindless, self-righteous meatbot that cannot handle the facts about breeders using, abusing, and/or neglecting their offspring
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: Venessolotic, Ai-chan, wombhockey and 6 others
exhausteduntreatable

exhausteduntreatable

Member
Oct 8, 2021
80
You're not "heinous," "evil", or a "nightmare" for thinking that. The bitch that forced you in existence and tormented you deserves all the suffering it can get. Anyone who throws that judgmental shit at you is a mindless, self-righteous meatbot that cannot handle the facts about breeders using, abusing, and/or neglecting their offspring
It was cathartic to read that, so thanks. She starved my brother and I until we were underweight. Forced me into eating disorder treatment but then called me huge when I put on weight. Threatened to accuse my dad of raping us if he didn't give her what she wanted in the divorce. Tried to have our dog euthanized when we disagreed with her. She's a horrible person and if she's capable of a modicum of guilt I hope she feels it. I'm making sure she's completely cut out of my will. I don't even want her near my remains.
 
Last edited:
  • Aww..
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: Venessolotic, TheWood, WhatDoesTheFoxSay? and 9 others
Rogue Proxy

Rogue Proxy

Enlightened
Sep 12, 2021
1,315
It was cathartic to read that, so thanks. She starved my brother and I until we were underweight. Forced me into eating disorder treatment but then called me huge when I put on weight. Threatened to accuse my Dad of raping us if he didn't give her what she wanted in the divorce. Tried to have our dog euthanized when we disagreed with her. She's a horrible person and if she's capable of a modicum of guilt I hope she feels it. I'm making sure she's completely cut out of my will. I don't even want her near my remains.
That bitch clearly should have been spayed, if not euthanized, decades ago. It's absolutely appalling how humans repeatedly and intentionally ignore, ridicule, shame, guilt-trip, silence, minimize, and victim-blame those who experience abuse and neglect from relations and "caretakers." Not to mention idolize every breeder not matter how horrific they are. I'm also cutting out every shitbag that's related to me from my will.
 
  • Like
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: Venessolotic, TheWood, WhatDoesTheFoxSay? and 5 others
Darkmoon Queen

Darkmoon Queen

Specialist
Apr 1, 2020
396
I'm curious to hear from you in revenge is the or at least a motive for CTB. Thanks!
Not for me. I admit I wonder sometimes how my suicide would affect some people from my life but one of my saving graces is my refusal to damage myself over somebody else.

Apart from the eating disorder and the cutting. But no one needs to know about that so I can pretend it doesn't apply.
 
  • Love
Reactions: patheticpartner
R

rivertone

New Member
Oct 6, 2021
4
Not my motive per se but I do plan to mention my retarded cunt of a former boss in my suicide note. Hopefully he reads it.
 
  • Yay!
  • Love
Reactions: Venessolotic, Shadowplay and patheticpartner
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,615
For me, ctb is to prevent decades of suffering and that is it. I am doing it as it is the right thing for me. I'm not quite sure I understand the idea of a revenge ctb, as I thought the whole purpose of revenge is to gain some sort of satisfaction of seeing somebody else in a disadvantaged position. If you ctb, you will no longer exist, you will be gone from this world.
 
  • Like
  • Love
  • Aww..
Reactions: Astronauta, wombhockey, WhatDoesTheFoxSay? and 7 others
forgotten15

forgotten15

Specialist
Aug 24, 2021
332
It isn't the driver or motive but I must admit that I have considered the impact it would have on my abusive malignant narcissist mother. Considering the reaction she had to me cutting her out of my life for the past year I can imagine it wouldn't be good. I know people would consider me a heinous and probably evil person and nightmare of a daughter for even thinking this but I hope it hurts her even a little. She has hurt me so so much throughout my life.
You are not evil, when you are hurt so much by someone it's normal to have thoughts like these. This also crossed my mind a few times so I understand your position.

I can only imagine the rage you must feel, but i believe you shouldn't let her determine your decision.
I think the decision to end your life should only have to do with your way of perceveing life and not be influenced by this type of emotion.
I hope time heals your soul.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Venessolotic and patheticpartner
exhausteduntreatable

exhausteduntreatable

Member
Oct 8, 2021
80
That bitch clearly should have been spayed, if not euthanized, decades ago. It's absolutely appalling how humans repeatedly and intentionally ignore, ridicule, shame, guilt-trip, silence, minimize, and victim-blame those who experience abuse and neglect from relations and "caretakers." Not to mention idolize every breeder not matter how horrific they are. I'm also cutting out every shitbag that's related to me from my will.
She's an absolutely evil person. Having children and then making them feel guilty for existing and abusing them. And this isn't a rare experience at all. No wonder so many people are deeply troubled. Good for you. I hate the societal view that we are obligated to our blood relations no matter what.
You are not evil, when you are hurt so much by someone it's normal to have thoughts like these. This also crossed my mind a few times so I understand your position.

I can only imagine the rage you must feel, but i believe you shouldn't let her determine your decision.
I think the decision to end your life should only have to do with your way of perceveing life and not be influenced by this type of emotion.
I hope time heals your soul.
Thanks. Sorry you can relate. No, it isn't determining my decision but I think the fact that she is my mother has contributed to my brain being the way it is.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: Venessolotic, Escapee, TheWood and 5 others
A

Acceptance

Member
Oct 8, 2021
17
Sometimes I feel like one of my reasons for wanting to CTB is because a couple years ago my manipulative and toxic mother didn't care at all when I told her during an emotional argument that I've been suicidal for years. Her only response in that situation is "do it, I don't care". I have never forgotten and even if she drank and has a drinking problem as well as mental health issues and trauma of her own, it doesn't take away the fact that she never even thought about those words coming from her only child. She has traumatized me for years in many ways and while im alive i feel like i want revenge.

I sometimes just really want to CTB to spite her. Let her know and make her feel like she pushed me to this point, but there is also a side of me where I want to peacefully go and leave no bad blood. Besides CTB will set me free and I wont have to deal with emotions or anything else that comes with living. I wouldnt even be able to experience any of those revenge feelings be satisfied because I would have already moved on.

Sorry if my writing is all over the place.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: Venessolotic, Ai-chan, bitingthedust and 6 others
exhausteduntreatable

exhausteduntreatable

Member
Oct 8, 2021
80
Sometimes I feel like one of my reasons for wanting to CTB is because a couple years ago my manipulative and toxic mother didn't care at all when I told her during an emotional argument that I've been suicidal for years. Her only response in that situation is "do it, I don't care". I have never forgotten and even if she drank and has a drinking problem as well as mental health issues and trauma of her own, it doesn't take away the fact that she never even thought about those words coming from her only child. She has traumatized me for years in many ways and while im alive i feel like i want revenge.

I sometimes just really want to CTB to spite her. Let her know and make her feel like she pushed me to this point, but there is also a side of me where I want to peacefully go and leave no bad blood. Besides CTB will set me free and I wont have to deal with emotions or anything else that comes with living. I wouldnt even be able to experience any of those revenge feelings be satisfied because I would have already moved on.

Sorry if my writing is all over the place.
How disgusting! I can relate. There is absolutely no excuse. Although people like that are usually full of them if you ever confront them on their awful behaviour- in my experience. My mother was full of self pity and excuses for her abusive behaviour.

I think what you're saying makes sense. Sometimes imagining my death hurting her gives me some satisfaction. I am still alive in the present moment, unfortunately. But this year of mostly not having to think about her at all has been such a relief.
 
  • Love
Reactions: Venessolotic and patheticpartner
Shadowplay

Shadowplay

Average life non-enjoyer
Sep 11, 2021
853
My suicide is partly revenge, but also cos I just don't give fkcu and I hate pretending I do which is so tiring.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: Venessolotic, blueclover_. and patheticpartner
Supersadmommy90

Supersadmommy90

Student
Sep 24, 2019
186
I almost feel as though ctb is a flex against God as if to say, the world has been deprived of wonderful me.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Venessolotic and patheticpartner
sadbadpsychogirl

sadbadpsychogirl

sonofabitch
May 29, 2020
725
i have trouble seeing suicide as an act of revenge, i see it as a way to end your own pain but i can't see how it would affect narcissistic abusers. these types of people don't usually blame themselves.
It was cathartic to read that, so thanks. She starved my brother and I until we were underweight. Forced me into eating disorder treatment but then called me huge when I put on weight. Threatened to accuse my dad of raping us if he didn't give her what she wanted in the divorce. Tried to have our dog euthanized when we disagreed with her. She's a horrible person and if she's capable of a modicum of guilt I hope she feels it. I'm making sure she's completely cut out of my will. I don't even want her near my remains.
i am so sorry you had to go through that. i can't even imagine how that must have affected you. she sounds truly evil and i really wish you the best.
 
Last edited:
  • Love
Reactions: patheticpartner
Shadowplay

Shadowplay

Average life non-enjoyer
Sep 11, 2021
853
i have trouble seeing suicide as an act of revenge, i see it as a way to end your own pain but i can't see how it would affect narcissistic abusers. these types of people don't usually blame themselves.
What? Why bring up narcissistic abusers?
 
Pluto

Pluto

Cat Extremist
Dec 27, 2020
4,864
What? Why bring up narcissistic abusers?
In my own case, the family abuse was narcissistic as well. So it's the opposite of revenge.

When dealing with people with the same underlying mentality of serial killers (minus the serial killing!), they would actually derive immense pleasure from seeing me dead and knowing that I suffered slowly after ingesting the poison of a dysfunctional childhood. They would also be happy to know that the legal estate of the parents will no longer need to be split 3 ways, and gleefully continue to manufacture and propagate narratives about themselves being a caring family and me being a deranged loser who went off the rails.

The only way to hurt these people would be to achieve some sort of successful life. Having failed at that, there's no choice but to let them win.
 
  • Aww..
  • Like
Reactions: Venessolotic, TheWood, WhatDoesTheFoxSay? and 1 other person
Shadowplay

Shadowplay

Average life non-enjoyer
Sep 11, 2021
853
1. I still think that narcissists can be hurt by revenge suicides; maybe not all, of course.

2. I'm not sure why revenge would not work cos of narcissistic as if they're the only kind of abusers which the post above seemed to state.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: blueclover_. and patheticpartner
Pluto

Pluto

Cat Extremist
Dec 27, 2020
4,864
There can be legal ramifications towards abusers. Not sure how it would work as an actual strategy for revenge. You might know of Brodie's Law.

Beyond that, it all depends on the specifics of the situation. But of course it is important to make choices that are true to yourself, regardless of others.
 
  • Love
Reactions: Venessolotic and patheticpartner
Shadowplay

Shadowplay

Average life non-enjoyer
Sep 11, 2021
853
There can be legal ramifications towards abusers. Not sure how it would work as an actual strategy for revenge. You might know of Brodie's Law.

Beyond that, it all depends on the specifics of the situation. But of course it is important to make choices that are true to yourself, regardless of others.
Ohh I didn't know about that law, but I think I remember that case.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: patheticpartner
sadbadpsychogirl

sadbadpsychogirl

sonofabitch
May 29, 2020
725
What? Why bring up narcissistic abusers?
because someone brought up the subject, and if someone wants to get back at somebody, they must have abused the person in some way...
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: patheticpartner
Shadowplay

Shadowplay

Average life non-enjoyer
Sep 11, 2021
853
because someone brought up the subject, and if someone wants to get back at somebody, they must have abused the person in some way...
Do you not see how suicide could be a revenge in some cases?
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: blueclover_. and patheticpartner
sadbadpsychogirl

sadbadpsychogirl

sonofabitch
May 29, 2020
725
i do see it but it is not an effective revenge tactic. i just thint its pointless as the only one whose going to suffer from it is the person killing themselves.
 
  • Love
Reactions: patheticpartner
Shadowplay

Shadowplay

Average life non-enjoyer
Sep 11, 2021
853
i do see it but it is not an effective revenge tactic. i just thint its pointless as the only one whose going to suffer from it is the person killing themselves.

1. Why is it not effective? What counts as effective revenge to you?

2. No the person might not suffer.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: patheticpartner
sadbadpsychogirl

sadbadpsychogirl

sonofabitch
May 29, 2020
725
2. No the person might not suffer.

this. and the only really effective revenge would be either to actually "hurt" the person or show them that they don't have any power over you.
 
Shadowplay

Shadowplay

Average life non-enjoyer
Sep 11, 2021
853
2. No the person might not suffer.

this. and the only really effective revenge would be either to actually "hurt" the person or show them that they don't have any power over you.
Sorry I was unclear - I meant the person suiciding might not suffer.

I'm still not sure why you think suicide can't be revenge, or even what 'really effective revenge' is as you put it.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: patheticpartner
sadbadpsychogirl

sadbadpsychogirl

sonofabitch
May 29, 2020
725
it can be seen as revenge by the person committing suicide but the reality is the person/s they are trying to get back at probably won't be intensely affected. i just explained what effective revenge would be.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: patheticpartner
Shadowplay

Shadowplay

Average life non-enjoyer
Sep 11, 2021
853
it can be seen as revenge by the person committing suicide but the reality is the person/s they are trying to get back at probably won't be intensely affected. i just explained what effective revenge would be.
1. 'probably wo't be intensely affected'? Umm what? Why would you think that? Do you have any evidence? People can be devastated from suicide, but I guess not cos of uumm... reasons.

2. 'effective revenge'. You put 'hurt' in inverted commas so not sure how you're using the word after re-defining it. I'm not sure why showing people they have no power over you is a worse revenge. The best revenge is living well slogan it would seem.

3. If you're a sneaky pro-life well played.
 
Last edited:
  • Hugs
Reactions: patheticpartner

Similar threads

Jealous Blackheart
Replies
16
Views
612
Recovery
sjuultje123
S
L
Replies
10
Views
318
Recovery
Someplace_nice
Someplace_nice
razor543
Replies
38
Views
1K
Suicide Discussion
martinso67
M
Catchingdabus27
Replies
1
Views
109
Suicide Discussion
SVEN
SVEN
montanatype
Replies
2
Views
146
Suicide Discussion
Griever
Griever