Drug addict mom, alcoholic dad. My dad raped my mom so here I am. Being 'good' Catholics abortion wasn't an option, unfortunately. No love, zero encouragement, but plenty of violence. Growing up my mom never hugged me once or told me she loved me. She did however constantly tell me how rotten and unwanted I was. My dad broke both of my hands and has suggested that I ctb many times. Not surprisingly my life has been a bit of a trainwreck. Never married, no kids, never able to be a fully functioning adult. I tried. Tons of counseling, EMDR, TMS, ketamine infusions, support groups like ACA, etc. Had to drop out of high school to earn money to eat. Against all odds I finally found a career I really enjoyed only to have it quickly ruined by chronic illness, likely caused by all the trauma growing up. Now I'm 'homeless' living with a cruel abusive shrew, under her roof. I'm hanging on because the dogs I take care of would be neglected like they were before I moved here if I ctb. It's either this or live in my 22 year old car. I'm getting sicker and less able to do her bidding, which is endless. It's exploitative, oppressive, and miserable beyond words. Daily abuse and humiliation. I have nowhere to turn and she knows it and can be as tyrannical as she pleases. I'm an emotional tampon and punching bag. I'm on 4 controlled substances to deal with my physical problems and the bullshit of my living situation. I turn 50 in less than two months. I don't have my whole life ahead of me. I sleep zero to 3 or 4 hours a day because of the disease I have and need amphetamines just to get out of bed.
That said, if there's an afterlife I can't imagine it being worse than this. I'll take my chances.
*If there are any pro-lifers reading this, please go and do the anatomically impossible (i.e, fuck yourselves) If it weren't for you busybody fuckwads I could have a peaceful exit. I hope one of you sanctimonious assholes find my pungent rotting carcass.