Surai
born on a sinking ship
- Mar 26, 2024
- 351
In late 2021 I had planned to kill myself by a partial hanging from the doorknob of my closet. I would attempt at a time I would usually go to bed so I would pass before anyone could find me. I had planned to be dead before I graduated from highschool. I didn't feel the need of acquiring a certificate for an accomplishment I had to experience hell for. But here I am still, since when SI kicks in it is a feeling not like any other. It is the body taking the flight stick and going in autopilot. And now the present day as I lay in my bed suffering from the memories of the past, and the reasons I had planned to kill myself. I realize If I were gone in the present day there would be no difference accept the memory of myself for my loved ones. There really isn't anything that has changed or gotten better. In fact I am finding more reasons to be steadfast on my way to getting out of here as soon as possible.