Anyone else find that ctb is harder as you get older?

[Ambivalent1]

10 yrs ago my problems were similar but fewer and I was full on ready to do it even though I was afraid. Now I just can't muster the strength. I'm so burned out from suffering.

I don't even know why I want to live. I'm rarely happy. Im stressed or anxious most of the time. Very few things are at all enjoyable anymore.

 

[Unattainable666]

I get you. I'm just afraid of failure. Otherwise, I'd be gone. I'm older and I live in the real world I know it's not going to get better.

 

[MyChoiceAlone]

actually, i thought you were young. sorry for being judgmental. it is difficult. currently waiting for winter as co method isn't viable during summer. kinda regret not trying last year. i was hoping for the swiss method but the more i look into it, the success rate shrinks more and more.

 

[Ambivalent1]

actually, i thought you were young. sorry for being judgmental. it is difficult. currently waiting for winter as co method isn't viable during summer. kinda regret not trying last year. i was hoping for the swiss method but the more i look into it, the success rate shrinks more and more.

I'm younger than middle age.

 

[MyChoiceAlone]

i suppose that's fine anyway. i've read posts where some have had these feelings as early as 8. i can't relate to that but everyone has their own right. i can't say for sure if i understood the concept of death at that age. maybe i'm just slow.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I would say that CTB becomes easier the older someone is because they did more things in their lives, I mean some people still want to to things before they CTB for example.

As bad as a personal situation may be there is also the effect of getting used to it and therefore I'd say over time and although a situation may not change how it is expected leads to less urge for CTB, some kind of SI maybe.

Anyway I'm pretty sure defeating SI and CTB is only possible in a moment of total desperation and hoplelessness otherwise it's more difficult.

 

[PuppyinPain]

Yes it definitely is, I believe it has something to do with the obliviousness of what you are really doing (in some cases) and the effects it will have. I think as we get older we are able to better understand what will happen after our deaths and not only that but have more responsibilities. It took me a while to desensitize myself to the idea that once I ctb it will be over and whatever problems I leave behind don't concern me anymore.

 

[k1w1]

So much easier as an older person. I have done enough living that is sufficient to my assessment as a life & a human experience. I've pushed at plenty of boundaries. Lots of travel, love & friendship. Much education & thought.
Also, there is not the element of tragedy in other's minds when a middle aged person dies. It is easier for them to rationalise. I've made no secret that when I'm ready it will be my choice of time and place.
A visit to an old people's care home is a sobering experience indeed. My grandmother was shouting at the walls in response to voices in her head. I've watched several people reach an age where the game was not worth the candle.
Screw that.

 

[Ambivalent1]

So much easier as an older person. I have done enough living that is sufficient to my assessment as a life & a human experience. I've pushed at plenty of boundaries. Lots of travel, love & friendship. Much education & thought.
Also, there is not the element of tragedy in other's minds when a middle aged person dies. It is easier for them to rationalise. I've made no secret that when I'm ready it will be my choice of time and place.
A visit to an old people's care home is a sobering experience indeed. My grandmother was shouting at the walls in response to voices in her head. I've watched several people reach an age where the game was not worth the candle.
Screw that.

Is this level of enlightenment reached at 40?

 

[Forever Sleep]

Not sure really. I've had ideation since I was 10. I'm 43 now and I'm just as scared of the process as I was back then.

In terms of the mental adjustment- feeling ready to let go of life- I think maybe that depends more on how much value you place on your own life. I don't think that is always dependant on age, although- I suppose it can be. The older you are- perhaps the more you have invested into living- so- maybe the more part of you wants to know if it would have come to fruition- given the chance. I don't know- I think I've always had a strong 'death drive' personally. I've always felt life was cheap. Being older and independant, at least I've been able to obtain a method without family knowing.

 

[k1w1]

Is this level of enlightenment reached at 40?

I dont have the temerity or insanity to claim enlightenment, neither would i wish you to see it as anything other than my response to the above question.
If I was 40 I would not have written this. It was a wonderful decade.

 

[Alltheywanted]

No, I feel quite the opposite. I used to be afraid of hell - now I'm not, I used to feel guilty for leaving my parents behind - now I'm not, and finally I used to be mad at my self that I want to ctb and now I'm totally cool with that. I'm sure that I'd ctb a week ago since all my worries are gone, but then I met some1 who gave me hope and well, I'm alive. If that person goes away I have already prepared 3 methods.

 

[lethargic]

It definitely feels like it gets easier. You have more access to resources to get what you need generally speaking + the naive hope that youth gives disappears. "I'm gonna get my shit together" doesn't pack the same punch when you've already lived through your lion's share of youth.

 

[jessisme]

IC and CCS have are no longer sources in the time I have been here and I have only been here about six months. It's definitely a trend likely to continue.

 

[CW36]

It gets easier for many, myself included. The older you get the more confident you become in general. Most common suicide age in this part of the world (for men at least) is the 50's.

 

[Sapphire]

I think that it gets easier the older you get. You have more life experience and are able put things in perspective and look at the big picture. You are better able to make a realistic assessment of your situation and know what the chances are your situation will improve and know what your chances are of realistically being able to get help.

It's also easier to accept your death and have fewer regrets the older you are, because you have already lived a big part of your life and don't have your whole future still in front of you.

 

[Ambivalent1]

I think that it gets easier the older you get. You have more life experience and are able put things in perspective and look at the big picture. You are better able to make a realistic assessment of your situation and know what the chances are your situation will improve and know what your chances are of realistically being able to get help.

It's also easier to accept your death and have fewer regrets the older you are, because you have already lived a big part of your life and don't have your whole future still in front of you.

What age does this occur?

 

[Homo erectus]

As one gets older there is increasing chance that something bad happens that one will lose the physical ability to carry out the procedure to end life.

 

[Skyyyfarer 26]

Yeah this is really true for me. I really wish I had done it when I was a teenager because then i somehow had more courage and was way more reckless and did not fear si that much. The only thing that kept me from ctb is that I lived with my strict parents and it was impossible to get a minute alone to myself back then. But I really wish I had tried harder because now I'm really afraid of pain and failed attempt for some reason and my life has only gotten worse

 

[CW36]

As one gets older there is increasing chance that something bad happens that one will lose the physical ability to carry out the procedure to end life.

You can spin that around and argue on the contrary, that's why more people attempt as they get older.

 

[Ligottian]

I'm 63, and find it is getting easier to imagine doing.