Anybody else don't see anything positive about having autism?

[Silent_cries]

Am I the only one with autism who doesn't see anything positive about having autism what so ever? I know they say it's a gift, but honestly I don't see it at all. It's been causing me nothing but issues my entire life. More like a curse than a gift to me honestly. Don't mean to hate on autism or anything. If you see it as a gift, then good for you. I don't. Not for me anyways. Just wanted to know if anyone else can relate, that's all.

 

[FuneralCry]

I also have autism and yes in fact to me existing could never be something positive at all, I will always despise how I was so cruelly and harmfully forced into existence. I see it as such a curse to exist in this hellish world where there is endless potential for suffering, under no circumstances could I ever wish to exist, existence is very much undesirable to me.

 

[pebpebpebpeb]

totally agree. the worst part is being self-aware of it. those who are further down the spectrum may not be fully aware all the time. but with level 1 autism you know what's wrong with you, but can't do much about it. the world wasn't built for people like us, and it never will be. (imo).

 

[Silent_cries]

totally agree. the worst part is being self-aware of it. those who are further down the spectrum may not be fully aware all the time. but with level 1 autism you know what's wrong with you, but can't do much about it. the world wasn't built for people like us, and it never will be. (imo).

Being aware of it is probably the worst part. I'd much rather have a disabillity that causes me to have low iq and the mindset of a child than this, coz at least I'd be happy and carefree. Instead I'm stuck being tormented by society and my own depression and anxieties.

 

[mtoro998]

It has only made my life significantly more difficult.

 

[sserafim]

Being aware of it is probably the worst part. I'd much rather have a disabillity that causes me to have low iq and the mindset of a child than this, coz at least I'd be happy and carefree. Instead I'm stuck being tormented by society and my own depression and anxieties.

Really? You'd rather have low IQ and the mindset of a child? I guess ignorance is bliss. Personally, I'd rather still have Asperger's/autism level 1 than be like that. Honestly, I'd rather be neurotypical, but if I were, then I'd probably be another mindless, brainwashed sheeple normie. So maybe not…

 

[Silent_cries]

Really? You'd rather have low IQ and the mindset of a child? I guess ignorance is bliss. Personally, I'd rather have Asperger's/autism level 1 than be like that. Honestly, I'd rather be neurotypical, but if I were then I'd be another mindless, brainwashed sheeple normie. So maybe not…

The thing with people who have the mindset of a child is that they're unable to see and understand all the horrible things in the world, thus being less capable of being unhappy and more capable of being happy and carefree, that's why I envy them. I don't mean to be selfish or anything, I swear! I just wish I didn't have to feel this way.

 

[ewlife]

I can't see how someone would see this condition as a gift. I'm lonely, isolated and permanently overstimulated due to my autism. The only benefit it comes with for me is the high IQ, but like mentioned above there are also drawbacks to high IQ and self-awareness.

 

[dragonofenvy]

Make me intellectually disabled any day because at least then I wouldn't be aware of the world.

 

[Silent_cries]

I can't see how someone would see this condition as a gift. I'm lonely, isolated and permanently overstimulated due to my autism. The only benefit it comes with for me is the high IQ, but like mentioned above there are also drawbacks to high IQ and self-awareness.

Well, not everyone with autism has high iq. I took an iq test with a neurologist several years ago and it came back average. Ngl, I'm glad I don't have high iq bc it sounds pretty awful. Although if having high iq benefits you, then cool for you. Pretty sure it doesn't for everyone though and I would not even want to try. In fact, even having average iq is too much for me :/ Sorry if this comment is a bit of a mess btw, I'm pretty tired rn so I can't rly think clearly.

 

[ewlife]

Well, not everyone with autism has high iq. I took an iq test with a neurologist several years ago and it came back average. Ngl, I'm glad I don't have high iq bc it sounds pretty awful. Although if having high iq benefits you, then cool for you. Pretty sure it doesn't for everyone though and I would not even want to try. In fact, even having average iq is too much for me :/ Sorry if this comment is a bit of a mess btw, I'm pretty tired rn so I can't rly think clearly.

I agree, that's why I said it was a benefit *for me*. I never said everyone with autism has a high IQ.

 

[Silent_cries]

Make me intellectually disabled any day because at least then I wouldn't be aware of the world.

I might sound crazy, but honestly it's such a relief that I'm not the only one who feel this way. I wish I wasn't capable of understanding what pain even is :(

I agree, that's why I said it was a benefit *for me*. I never said everyone with autism has a high IQ.

Yeah sorry, I'm rly tired rn so I re-read what you wrote while typing the comment to realise that. My bad! Sorry if I offended you, it wasn't meant that way at all!

 

[sapphoslastpoem]

Yup, I'm on the spectrum. This has only set me back in every area of my life, I don't understand how anyone could ever say this is a gift—this world eats us up and leaves nothing left

 

[dragonofenvy]

Although if having high iq benefits you, then cool for you. Pretty sure it doesn't for everyone though and I would not even want to try. In fact, even having average iq is too much for me :/ Sorry if this comment is a bit of a mess btw, I'm pretty tired rn so I can't rly think clearly.

I've never found much substance in the whole IQ = smart logic. Gardner's multiple intelligences are a bit more in line with reality imo. I for example have above average IQ but that just means I can see patterns in things. Cool I guess. Part of my IQ test was random trivia (questions like "What is the most natively spoken language in the world?" and knowing what the date was, as well as having to draw bizarre drawings of random shapes and lines I'm shown by memory which I really sucked at doing btw. But I guess I'm academically smart but common sense dumb as rocks. I guarantee you can have someone with a below-average IQ who is a philosophical mastermind or a genius at engineering I don't think the whole high IQ thing means you're smart it's about what you experienced in life and whether you were taught to critically think.

 

[Silent_cries]

Yup, I'm on the spectrum. This has only set me back in every area of my life, I don't understand how anyone could ever say this is a gift—this world eats us up and leaves nothing left

True, and then we get frustrated and angry and causes even more damage to the world, or at least that's been the case for me :/

 

[sapphoslastpoem]

True, and then we get frustrated and angry and causes even more damage to the world, or at least that's been the case for me :/

When we get frustrated, I've noticed we often get accused of using our disability as an excuse or that we just wish everything was handed to us. I simply wish that people weren't so evil-intentioned, that's something I've been shown over and over—that I can never trust anyone because they only want to tear me down and spit in my face

 

[Silent_cries]

When we get frustrated, I've noticed we often get accused of using our disability as an excuse or that we just wish everything was handed to us. I simply wish that people weren't so evil-intentioned, that's something I've been shown over and over—that I can never trust anyone because they only want to tear me down and spit in my face

So true! I honestly wish I was never born. I feel so alone, I have no one I can turn to anymore. Not even my mom bc she doesn't take me seriously anymore. I mean, I can't blame her, I'm not that easy to take seriously when there's been so much shit with me over the years.

 

[WatermelonMel]

anyone who sees it as a "gift" doesn't understand at all what it's like tbh. It's miserable, there is not a single good thing about it. I hate it more than anything.

 

[ewlife]

I've never found much substance in the whole IQ = smart logic. Gardner's multiple intelligences are a bit more in line with reality imo. I for example have above average IQ but that just means I can see patterns in things. Cool I guess. Part of my IQ test was random trivia (questions like "What is the most natively spoken language in the world?" and knowing what the date was, as well as having to draw bizarre drawings of random shapes and lines I'm shown by memory which I really sucked at doing btw. But I guess I'm academically smart but common sense dumb as rocks. I guarantee you can have someone with a below-average IQ who is a philosophical mastermind or a genius at engineering I don't think the whole high IQ thing means you're smart it's about what you experienced in life and whether you were taught to critically think.

IQ is a heuristic for general cognitive abilities, which are a part of "smartness" by most definitions. It's definitely more than just life experience that makes someone smart (nature vs nurture is a false dichotomy!) but nurture absolutely plays a key role. I like the model of multiple intelligences and hope we move in a more inclusive direction when discussing what it means to be smart. With that said, the current IQ tests load well on the CHC model, which is quite well studied. It's also important to keep in mind that these are tests of achievement, meaning performance is somewhat dependent on culture and SES, with an obvious benefit to white upper class people. So while IQ does measure your "smartness" to an extent, no one with a low IQ should be told they aren't smart or capable of succeeding in life.

 

[Shar]

The only positive is that I can deal with loneliness better, but I don't even know if this is a personality characteristic or an autism condition. Maybe I've just gotten used to being alone.

Other than that, it's just negatives. Im far slower than everyone else. At my old job I always had someone to supervise me, even after working there for more than 1 year. To this day I don't have a driver's license, I've already failed the test 3 times, because i can't learn. And i will probably fail more if i try, because already forgot everything.
I also have difficulty expressing myself, I cant express how I think properly and a huge block of creativity.
I have a child's vocabulary. Tests that require much writing I leave blank.

Its incredible difficulty relating to people. Keeping friendship, because no social skills. Im offensive and embarrassing without even realizing. I can't connect with anyone, it seems like people are different specimen than me. I just observe them around me, as if I weren't there. Every conversation I have with them seems robotic, boring or harmful. Eventually I just hate them and wanting as much distance as possible.

My fate is to be alone forever, it was like that from the beginning.

I can't see how someone would see this condition as a gift. I'm lonely, isolated and permanently overstimulated due to my autism. The only benefit it comes with for me is the high IQ, but like mentioned above there are also drawbacks to high IQ and self-awareness.

I was clinically tested with an IQ123, but what difference does it make if I'm too mentally flawed to perform any task. My performance is that of someone with 80 IQ, even they can accomplish more than me.

 

[4.I.2.Must.Die]

The thing with people who have the mindset of a child is that they're unable to see and understand all the horrible things in the world, thus being less capable of being unhappy and more capable of being happy and carefree, that's why I envy them. I don't mean to be selfish or anything, I swear! I just wish I didn't have to feel this way.

I see things in a childish way and even though I can challenge it I can assure you that it's not all fun and carefree.

 

[sserafim]

The only positive is that I can deal with loneliness better, but I don't even know if this is a personality characteristic or an autism condition. Maybe I've just gotten used to being alone.

Other than that, it's just negatives. Im far slower than everyone else. At my old job I always had someone to supervise me, even after working there for more than 1 year. To this day I don't have a driver's license, I've already failed the test 3 times, because i can't learn. And i will probably fail more if i try, because already forgot everything.
I also have difficulty expressing myself, I cant express how I think properly and a huge block of creativity.
I have a child's vocabulary. Tests that require much writing I leave blank.

Its incredible difficulty relating to people. Keeping friendship, because no social skills. Im offensive and embarrassing without even realizing. I can't connect with anyone, it seems like people are different specimen than me. I just observe them around me, as if I weren't there. Every conversation I have with them seems robotic, boring or harmful. Eventually I just hate them and wanting as much distance as possible.

My fate is to be alone forever, it was like that from the beginning.

I was clinically tested with an IQ123, but what difference does it make if I'm too mentally flawed to perform any task. My performance is that of someone with 80 IQ, even they can accomplish more than me.

I have a high IQ as well and I heard that "twice exceptional" youth (with autism and high IQ) were more likely to be depressed. There was a study done on it

 

[Shar]

I have a high IQ as well and I heard that "twice exceptional youth" (with autism and high IQ) were more likely to be depressed. There was a study done on it

I think if you have autism you are more likely to be depressed regardless of it. If it's low then you're really screwed.

 

[justcallmeJ]

Its likely im suffering from autism all this time and im 25 now, i did the dsm-5 interview with my therapist and i meet all the criteria, im just waiting for the official diagnosis but it cant be anything else then autism. Explains a lot why life always was so hard for me but not for anyone else, or that i could never socialize normally but others always could. Basicly most of the reasons of me being suicidal comes from autism, what a curse...

 

[DiglySilly]

I no longer feel like a human being, just a robot programmed to do stupid things for others to mock. My existence is a joke, in lousy taste.

 

[Aim]

All of these things or feelings Pop up actually, depending on the mood of the day! Would be great if it only was excitement though. How is it for you?

 

[Silent_cries]

I see things on a childish way and even though I can challenge it I can assure you that it's not all fun and carefree.

I was talking about those who are so mentally disabled that they're basically like a 5 year old. Sorry if I didn't clarify it well enough. I get where you're coming from too, I can be childish too, I sleep with plushies, I like playing with toys and I daydream a lot! Yet, as you can probably tell by now, my life is as far from happy and carefree as it can be. Sorry about the confusion, I hope I clarified it better now.

 

[4.I.2.Must.Die]

I was talking about those who are so mentally disabled that they're basically like a 5 year old. Sorry if I didn't clarify it well enough. I get where you're coming from too, I can be childish too, I sleep with plushies, I like playing with toys and I daydream a lot! Yet, as you can probably tell by now, my life is as far from happy and carefree as it can be. Sorry about the confusion, I hope I clarified it better now.

Basically you're referring to low functioning autistic people then, level 2 and especially level 3 whilst for all of us to be on here are level 1 (high functioning).

All of these things or feelings Pop up actually, depending on the mood of the day! Would be great if it only was excitement though. How is it for you?

You're not autistic though are you?

 

[Silent_cries]

Basically you're referring to low functioning autistic people then, level 2 and especially level 3 whilst for all of us to be on here are level 1 (high functioning).

You're not autistic though are you?

Never said it has to be autism specificly, just any disabillity that gives you the mindset of a child. To be fair, I don't rly know what the mindset of a low functioning autistic besides the ones that can actually communicate in verbal or written form or similar. I mean, how are we supposed to know when they can't tell us? I like thinking that probably don't nave the mindset of a child tbh, but more like a trapped person? Idk, it's hard for me to wrap my mind around it tbh. I guess all I'm trying to say is that I wish I was like a happy, carefree 5 year old who weren't able to understand how horrid the world rly is.

 

[Lookingtoflyfree]

IQ is a bullshit concept. Lots written on it but here's one: https://bigthink.com/neuropsych/iq-load-bs/

I absolutely despise having autism and it's why I'm on this forum. I don't see anything good about it - I likely would have had the strengths regardless of it and it's just made the downsides of difficulty of dealing with people.

Right now my special interest is seeing how to move to another country and packing up my life here so I can CTB. Autism makes planning hell but knowing I won't be here for long gives me so much joy and a fun 'hobby' with a healing end.