I was born in need of prescription sleep medications which did not yet exist. Up to that time, people with conditions like my severe congenital obstructive sleep apnea had very truncated life spans.
Finally, I hired a psychiatrist and have been on either temazepam (which no longer works), zolpidem or eszopiclone. At this stage, eszopiclone does not appear to be working at all, and it was never consistently effective, leaving me dependent on 20 to 25 mg crushed zolpidem for a reliable night's sleep.
Last night, I tortured myself my forgoing zolpidem entirely, and plan on doing so again tonight, as I am trying to ward off tolerance to zolpidem and extend my supply.
Melatonin has never worked for me, and sleep equipment only induced a two and a half month bout of very severe bronchitis. Nor did sleep equipment help after I underwent comprehensive corrective surgery.
Orthodox allopathic medicine and alternative medicine have each been decisive failures for me.
Sleep apnea has been linked to heart disease and cancer, and I have recently been experiencing symptoms of both.
For years, i have been eligible for psychiatrist administered euthanasia in the nations where that is legal, except for the fact of my not being a citizen in those countries. Upon my next physical examination, I may well also be eligible for physician assisted suicide in a neighboring state just half an hour from where I live, and I have contacts there and in another state where physician assisted suicide is legal for transferring my residency to.
No, I do not like being dependent on medications, but I do not know any type one diabetics who like needing to administer insulin injections to themselves either.
As for any "do-gooder" interventionist cocksuckers from Fuxthe69 who do not wholeheartedly approve of my membership here, I would tell them to go blow me, except they don't deserve the privilege or pleasure of my letting them suck me off (let alone swallowing after).
