Help Any tips to cope with temporarily not having access to antipsychotics?

[whitetaildeer]

Hi everyone, I made a thread a while back about stress-induced psychosis, but to be honest, I was in a lot of denial about my mental health. I've lied to a lot of people, including myself, and hidden this part of me, out of insecurity.

I've been medically recognized with schizophrenia since I was 12 years old. I was even on antipsychotics for a while until 2021. I then lost access to them altogether in 2022, when I came to live with my father. I am not allowed to take medication of any kind while under his roof; at best, I'll get the shit beat out of me and have my pills thrown out, and at worst, I will be evicted altogether. He knows I have schizophrenia, as well as serious other problems, and his "solution" for me is to suck it up and "think my way out of it by using my brain God gifted me with". If I want to self-medicate, I have to drink alcohol, which helps with the stress to some degree that comes with hallucinating episodically, but makes me ten times more willing to act on my delusions.

Obviously, all of this has had devastating results for my emotional and mental well-being, and my personal life. It's kind of also my own fault, to be frank. I was arrogant enough to believe I didn't need antipsychotics for some time, and that I just had to have enough self-control to "think my way out of it", like my father has told me for so long.

I'm moving out soon, getting my life together, and I will then finally be able to get back on medication. Until then, I do have to wait things out. The wait is torturous, and I'm going crazy. This isn't the worst episode I've had, but it's certainly up there, and it's eating me alive. I'm desperate for any tips or coping mechanisms, even if they're small or only help for 5 seconds. If anyone has any I'd deeply appreciate it.

 

[iLikeFrogs]

I'm crossing my fingers that you'll be able to get back on meds soon. I went thru psychosis a few years ago (either stress induced or bc of Hashimotos idk) and my friends reality checking me but not in a "this shi is not real and you're delusional" kind of way helped me. they steered me slowly out of some of my delusiuons, but some stayed until today.

as for coping tips, I found that keeping my hands busy with drawing or even scribbling some random stuff helps me to stay connected with reality more since I can't stay idle or performing only one task before I start spitralling. also try calling your psychiatrist if there's an option to reschedule and to get the perscription early

 

[whitetaildeer]

I'm crossing my fingers that you'll be able to get back on meds soon. I went thru psychosis a few years ago (either stress induced or bc of Hashimotos idk) and my friends reality checking me but not in a "this shi is not real and you're delusional" kind of way helped me. they steered me slowly out of some of my delusiuons, but some stayed until today.

as for coping tips, I found that keeping my hands busy with drawing or even scribbling some random stuff helps me to stay connected with reality more since I can't stay idle or performing only one task before I start spitralling. also try calling your psychiatrist if there's an option to reschedule and to get the perscription early

Unfortunately, I don't have friends anymore. I chased them all away by attacking them during the peak of my psychotic episode. I try to keep as many people as possible away from dealing with this, if that makes any sense? They don't know I have schizophrenia, and I would prefer to keep it that way; what I did was wrong, but throw being mentally ill into the mix and it makes everything even more messy, so I'd prefer they move on without any further troubles.

But thank you for the advice. I'll try and pick up art again, since I used to draw, and involve myself more into my hobbies. No chance of getting my meds back earlier than planned though, just because it's too much of a risk. :[