Any other trans people?

[ctkmtt]

Surprisingly for me being trans is one of the smaller reasons I want to CTB. It definitely influences me though. I've been on hormones since early summer and still people call me a girl or obviously view me as a fake boy. It just sucks.
Many hugs to my fellow trans people and supporters

 

[bigj75]

Not a trans but I have a soft spot for them.

 

[weedoge]

Not a trans but I have a soft spot for them.

Sounds a little bit creepy. Trans people don't want pity.

To add to the thread I certainly have some dysphoric feelings and its largely down to my gender. I couldn't call myself trans but its a very complicated issue. Not worth delving into so close to the end.

 

[weedoge]

Adding, Like I said I'm transmasc (been on T for 11 years and had top surgery 11 years ago as well and hysto 5 years ago, don't plan on any more surgeries) but am starting to feel more..non binary. I'm still ok with he/him pronouns but wish I hadn't gone on T and just had top surgery and the hysto. I wouldn't be so fat, and I don't like being hairy (I'm VERY hairy) though I do keep a very short beard (trimmed with a beard trimmer on the shortest setting on the guard) because I don't like how round my face looks without it (too fat/round).

And I don't think my trans-ness is really why I want to CTB (though being transmasc and feeling NB is hard..especially when I can't really tell anyone because I was *so damn certain* of my "masculinity" and transitioning and such and I'm afraid people won't take me seriously if I say I feel mentally like I want to partially de-transition. Not totally, obviously, but like I said I would love to get electrolysis or something but good god that would be expensive and painful (like I said, full body fur suit here) I don't know how MTF's do it. Plus I am losing my hair on my head (so unfair, why I am I hairy everywhere the top of my head?! SO UNFAIR).

You suffer EDS too right? When I read that I was surprised, I used to vaguely know somebody who was wheelchair bound and their situation very similar to how yours sounds. I hope you get the peace youre searching for because from what I know your situation is bloody awful.

 

[bigj75]

Sounds a little bit creepy. Trans people don't want pity.

To add to the thread I certainly have some dysphoric feelings and its largely down to my gender. I couldn't call myself trans but its a very complicated issue. Not worth delving into so close to the end.

I don't mean a soft spot as in pitty but in an interest way.

 

[weedoge]

I don't mean a soft spot as in pitty but in an interest way.

It's still a little odd but I suppose that may just be a wording thing. It's not really nice for someone to be told your issue is "interesting" when it's something that tears your whole world apart and even almost seems irrational to yourself.

 

[bigj75]

It's still a little odd but I suppose that may just be a wording thing. It's not really nice for someone to be told your issue is "interesting" when it's something that tears your whole world apart and even almost seems irrational to yourself.

I'm not trans myself so I have no business saying its an issue or not.

 

[weedoge]

I'm not trans myself so I have no business saying its an issue or not.

Don't worry, not attacking you, just a difficult subject.

 

[Duqu]

You suffer EDS too right? When I read that I was surprised, I used to vaguely know somebody who was wheelchair bound and their situation very similar to how yours sounds. I hope you get the peace youre searching for because from what I know your situation is bloody awful.

Yes, EDS, wheelchair etc (though not 100% of the time in wheelchair; I use forearm crutches some of the time).

 

[RainAndSadness]

Thanks for all of your input. It's really interesting for me to read the story of other people that go through the same or similar struggles. And I share your suffer. I hope you will find what you are looking for, be it happiness or a peaceful exit.
I also feel the struggle of non-binary people, @Duqu. I know it's really hard to fit in, in this dual society where everyone gets labeled either male or female. All of you people are valid. About the electrolysis - we have to do several hair removal sessions for the facial hair. They are quite painful but they're covered by health insurance in many countries. I don't know about your situation, I guess non-binary people are in a different position than I am - but you could ask your health insurance about that too. Health insurance companies usually cover it for mtf's because it severely reduces gender dysphoria. Maybe it could work for you. I'm halfway through with it, although I don't find the strength right now to do the last couple of sessions. But I'm almost done with it.
@ChaosDergon, I think it must be really difficult to handle BDP and gender dysphoria at the same time. I can relate to your job situation as I am unemployed right now and it's almost impossible for me to find a job. And transition also was the best decision ever in my life, I agree with you on that. I also had the hope transition would "fix" my me and well, it didn't. It increased the quality of my life greatly but I'm still suffering. Are you actively seeking to ctb or still fighting? If so, I hope you can find a way to get rid of your anxiety and beat the gender dysphoria as well as your depression. I unterstand BPD is a severe disorder and very difficult to handle. Thanks for sharing your story.

I see there are very differing reasons for all of you you to be a member of this forum. Hugs and support to you all.

 

[ouvreyes]

If this thread is still going, I'm trans. I live in California, so I'm relatively lucky. My parents also aren't religious or anything, choosing to pretend I'm not trans rather than actively kick me out or whatever. Because of that, I'd be able to actually figure it out once I move out, so while it definitely contributes a Lot to being miserable and shit, it's more of an "enhancer" (for lack of a better term) for the reason I plan to ctb, rather than the primary one.

 

[worldexploder]

I am not trans but I support LGBT rights to the fullest extent. I find many trans women to be very attractive as well.

 

[Miss clefable]

I am not trans but I support LGBT rights to the fullest extent. I find many trans women to be very attractive as well.

Fucking kill me

 

[worldexploder]

Fucking kill me

Huh? Did I say something wrong?

 

[Miss clefable]

I feel like I'm going to get banned

 

[worldexploder]

I feel like I'm going to get banned

How come?

 

[Miss clefable]

How come?

Let's just say I hate myself okay

 

[worldexploder]

Let's just say I hate myself okay

I'm sorry.

 

[bigj75]

I am not trans but I support LGBT rights to the fullest extent. I find many trans women to be very attractive as well.

Yae trans are cute.

 

[RubySimon]

I am trans, non binary to be precise.
The fact that I'll never get a body devoid of gender and bilogical sex traits is a part of why I want to CTB, but not the main reason.

 

[Cubashii]

Im transgender. Female to male.

 

[RainAndSadness]

Regarding trans people being attractive. I rarely met people that genuinely find trans people attractive. The majority of people I've met that expressed interest and attraction towards trans people were simply chasing after the 'tranny dick'. It's very hard to find a partner that respects you as a whole person if you're trans, that's my experience at least. I guess that's also the reason why most trans people date other trans people. I'm currently in a relationship with a pre-HRT transgirl and we understand each other on a special level. I wish people would find me attractive though. When I look into the mirror all I see is hate and despise. I can't accept any comments from people that say otherwise and it's impossible for me to take compliments seriously, when I receive them. I hate my body and I think I'm utterly unattractive. Even if it isn't true, I'm doomed to see myself like that due to gender dysphoria. I think my body is disgusting and I genuinely wish I was born as a woman. This and the lacking progress on hormones drive me to my exit.

 

[Miss clefable]

Regarding trans people being attractive. I rarely met people that genuinely find trans people attractive. The majority of people I've met that expressed interest and attraction towards trans people were simply chasing after the 'tranny dick'. It's very hard to find a partner that respects you as a whole person if you're trans, that's my experience at least. I guess that's also the reason why most trans people date other trans people. I'm currently in a relationship with a pre-HRT transgirl and we understand each other on a special level. I wish people would find me attractive though. When I look into the mirror all I see is hate and despise. I can't accept any comments from people that say otherwise and it's impossible for me to take compliments seriously, when I receive them. I hate my body and I think I'm utterly unattractive. Even if it isn't true, I'm doomed to see myself like that due to gender dysphoria. I think my body is disgusting and I genuinely wish I was born as a woman. This and the lacking progress on hormones drive me to my exit.

Pretty much the same except I self med

 

[RainAndSadness]

Pretty much the same except I self med

Lots of support to you. Where do you live and where do you get your hormones from? Apparently inhousepharmacy is a hot spot for people that self-medicate. I'm not satisfied with my current dosage and I thought about ordering hormones to speed up my HRT progress.

 

[Miss clefable]

England Uk

United pharmacies

 

[ChaosDergon]

Regarding trans people being attractive. I rarely met people that genuinely find trans people attractive. The majority of people I've met that expressed interest and attraction towards trans people were simply chasing after the 'tranny dick'. It's very hard to find a partner that respects you as a whole person if you're trans, that's my experience at least. I guess that's also the reason why most trans people date other trans people. I'm currently in a relationship with a pre-HRT transgirl and we understand each other on a special level. I wish people would find me attractive though. When I look into the mirror all I see is hate and despise. I can't accept any comments from people that say otherwise and it's impossible for me to take compliments seriously, when I receive them. I hate my body and I think I'm utterly unattractive. Even if it isn't true, I'm doomed to see myself like that due to gender dysphoria. I think my body is disgusting and I genuinely wish I was born as a woman. This and the lacking progress on hormones drive me to my exit.

I hate mirrors and other reflective surfaces; I too despise what I see in the mirror. Actually can be super rage inducing and just want to break the mirror. Compliments are super awkward for me, I basically cannot believe them. I want to, especially when it comes from someone I care about, But it just sounds pandering and fake to my ears. Hrt progress has not been greatest for me either, but this could also be due to the instability in my life from the bpd; I end up off and on HRT a lot (forget, dissociate, get lost in other worlds, other things). It really annoys me when I talk to health care professionals about this aspect and then they doubt my commitment and me being trans because I have not been consistent with HRT. Doing things I should can be hard for me; but in all these years this one aspect of who I am has not changed, it is immutable unlike other aspects of myself.

 

[Rook86]

Me transwoman, being trans in itself isn't a reason rather the painful life I lived so far and the uncertain future :(