Discussion Any fellow trans people here?

[İnilerim]

I'm nb too. Though it's not the main reason, having a body that will forever be disfigured by T does not help my mental health at all.

 

[deadtrace]

Yeah I'm also trans. Dysphoria wasn't one of my reasons in the past but I think I was just suppressing it. Been thinking a lot recently about stuff like surgery, and it's made me more and more aware of how much I hate my appearance. Also dragged up memories of asking other trans friends advice on my face and just being told "you need facial surgery, which I can't get here, or nothing will help otherwise".

 

[Divinus]

I recently found out I was diagnoised at 11, not 12 and I've been showing signs of Gender Identity Disorder/Gender Dysphoria since ages 6-8...

This makes me more sad since I now know my doctors have been ignoring my medical condition for even longer. I am angry at my parents and those whom I thought I could trust, revenge suicide is on my calender.

 

[username12345]

It seems like there arent many from what ive seen but idk. anyone else here trans?

for me personally dysphoria is like one of the biggest reasons i want to ctb. even if it hasnt been that bad usually it's always lurking in the background as a reminder that even if i were to treat any other issues i have, i'd still never be able to live a happy life in this body. even ignoring the current media craze and hate towards trans people, i will never be satisfied with my body. i will never be able to have kids. i wont even be able to have sex properly (unless i get SRS which id only get from like thailand so itd be as realistic as possible and self lubricating or i'd feel worse but thats super fucking expensive, but even with that it just isnt the same.) it just makes me not even wanna try and treat anything else yknow?

so like as i said, any fellow trans people here? and like how has been trans affected your desire to CTB, do you think if you recieved your desired body that you'd no longer want to CTB?

The problem is is no matter how cis passing a trans person is with or without clothes, transphobia still exists systemically and personally. There's only so much you can do to help yourself if there are always people there to bring you down. Physically transitioning hasn't been much of an issue for me but it's been hell socially. Especially cause not every trans person is going to be a stereotypical girl or guy whether physically or socially or just with their sense of gender. Even if your body was identical to a cis person and no one ever knew you could still get bullied for not fitting in with the way cis people act.

 

[CremstDearest]

Yup yup, trans masc here

 

[yearofluigi]

I'm transfemme :3 I came out publicly and changed all my legal info last summer, and I honestly think I did it too soon. I don't pass, I don't fit in, and it hurts so badly when someone refers to me by my old name or pronouns but I can't can't just roll with the misgendering because all of my documentation says I'm a woman. (This is especially bothersome at work, where my email uses my chosen name, so I can't really boymode.) I also feel like I'd be bad representation for trans people if I detransition, even temporarily.

I'd give anything to be cis. Obviously I'd prefer to be a cis woman, but if there was a way to somehow make me okay with being a man, I'd gladly take that over feeling like a freak like I do now.

 

[belladyne]

Edit: The fact that I wasn't born female or at least transitioned earlier (even though I started "early") is a trauma in it of itself that I don't believe is resolvable.

same here. the way i heard so many older ppl talk about their regrets & wishes made me almost delusional for a brief moment, you really do believe having that "teen transitioner" badge would save you, keep you safe, protect you from ever ending up here. & then you wake up, and you're left with nothing. too late to save yourself and no learned numbness from adult repression to let you power thru. maybe statistically your age bracket has "better chances", but if you're one of the ones that still ends up with a shit dice roll, you might crash even harder.

 

[natthebrat]

i am. been on hrt for just over 3 years, came out 8 long years before that. it took me so long partly due to my parents not taking it seriously when i was younger, and mostly bc of me being too scared to assert myself in response. my dysphoria is rare nowadays, and im not planning to have any more done other than maybe hair removal and/or an orchiectomy eventually. thus, i wouldnt say its the main reason i want to ctb, thats mainly due to finances/employment issues. the main trans related struggles i have now are of course fear of losing my hrt with the political situation, and sadness over the fact that i never got to be myself during my teen years. although, it is in a way related to my main reason, in that i ended up in the situation im in part, to put it simply, due to unhealthy coping mechanisms when i was younger to deal with social dysphoria.

 

[NormallyNeurotic]

Transman here who is a (C-DID) system host with other alters who identify as trans too! My dysphoria has absolutely affected my urge to CTB. I still remember finally realizing that I want to medically transition and feeling such relief when a doctor told me it's possible... until a rule was passed that made it impossible for me to at the time. I had gone from making huge leaps and bounds in my mental health at the time to just crying all day.

Nowadays, I'm too disabled to medically transition yet. I'm 20, and I understand that's still young, but I'm terrified I won't get better "in time." My dysphoria has been Hellish lately too.

 

[bitcrush]

I am a trans woman. I've been on hrt for almost 7 years but I still struggle with a lot of dysphoria. I feel like being trans has robbed me of living a normal life and it contributes a lot to wanting to ctb. I have parents and friends that are supportive though so things could be a lot worse I guess

 

[NormallyNeurotic]

Transfem Jew reporting in. To be honest, those two parts of my identity have made it so hard for me to find friends. I take pride in being both transfem and Jewish but I also acknowledge that many of those around me aren't proud of me and decide to have those parts of my identity affect what they think. If I were to get my dream body tho I think it might convince me not to. At least I will be more comfortable. Funny enough I get the most dysphoria and get a bit shy when I'm participating in stuff like the girls' traditions in theatre as when I do them I don't see myself fitting in but rather insecure due to some past experiences.

I've been on blockers for the past few years and it has caused me to develop some breast tissue which can be really obvious without a shirt on but otherwise just makes me look fitter than I am by making it look like I have muscle (I've gotten undeserved compliments for being fitter than I am xd). I have the option to go on estrogen as well but I'm waiting for when I graduate soon and go to college because the one I chose is majority queer. I also did voice training over the summer bur I've had to abandon it because I have literally no free time due to the heavy workload I'm getting, but I digress.

In short, if I were to get my dream body and voice it might steer me off my current course

Transmasc Jew here! Some of the stuff you said is unfortunately relatable <3

 

[Kadaver]

I'm trans too. My dysphoria is a big reason for me wanting to end things too

 

[TheHolySword]

fellow trans here! female, 20s.
it's kinda complicated for me. because in some ways being trans is a core and important part of me and saved my life when i realized who I was. but now it's slowly killing me I think. every time I look in a mirror, I see everything that I'm not. I go most days without seeing myself because when I do it fills me with an overwhelming urge to ctb. but unfortunately even if i could fix my looks like it were the sims and achieve what i think my perfect body would be, i would still want to die. it goes so much deeper than that and i cant escape it

 

[onlyforever1]

I'm technically trans but I'm too fat to be trans really so it's just online

 

[smolder]

trans guy here. dysphoria is a big reason but not the main one. even if i was born a cis man i would still be the same ugly me

 

[Eudaimonic]

i have dysphoria (i take hrt but that's it) and it's the main reason tbh

 

[broken_doll]

im a trans woman in my late 20s andd yeah dysphoria kills me sm. it's been a decade since i started transitioning and just. i'll never be able to afford the surgeries or anything and i cant handle looking in the mirror