shantyizlit

shantyizlit

Really, what was the point?
Jul 7, 2023
189
Brain be like: Yeah bro but like what if, yeah? You could somehow even live a single day by yourself in your apartment. And I mean then we could like start going on a carnivore diet, remember back when we did that shit we felt good, maybe that can help.
And then bro we can like drop acid and shit, what if our mindset just completely changes and we somehow have the motivation to do anything with our life at all. Like just anything. We could like learn yoga from a pro and then that could become our life, just doing yoga daily imagine how good that shit would be for your body.
Now I know things seem bleak right now, most you can muster right now is waste 90% of your day in front of the computer distracting yourself with parasocial relationships. Maybe if someone pressures you into going for a walk that's on the table as well..
But what if we took those drugs and by some miracle that changed? We would have the motivation to train yoga, we'd have motivation to cook our own meals.
Yeah nah bro but for real, I know in all likeliness we're either just gonna have a bad trip or go batshit insane again because we can't deal with reality, but bro trust me, don't fucking kill yourself, we haven't tried it yet. Yeah I know we might get institutionalized again if we go batshit off a trip to the fractal realm on DMT, but how can you know for sure? You know what I don't even want to think of the risks involved.. let's just fucking do it. Life could be so great we just gotta get out there and do all those things, that at least have a chance of making us want to live. What do you mean it would just be easier to kill yourself? Ok actually now I'm kind of malfunctioning I don't have a proper response, but here's a hopeful feeling in your gut.. I hope you like it. Seriously bro let's hang in there even though we've been through this a thousand times and tomorrow you're just going to feel like offing yourself the second you wake up once again. Sorry bro but I really just can't cope with having come to a logical conclusion that life would be worth forfeiting, I gotta keep coming up with literally anything that we can do to prolong this life.
What do you mean I'm complicating things? You're saying there is a simple solution to everything and that is death, and that once that happens literally nothing is ever going to matter to me ever again? Nah bro I can't believe it. You gotta be kidding me.
Do I think life goes on after death? Well I'm not really sure.. I don't know. But I don't want to find out. Honestly I'm just really scared of the thought of non-existence.. It's literally the one-thing I have never known and can not comprehend nor process.. Please don't take me there I'm scared of the unknown.
Honestly bro at this point you've exhausted my capacity of mental gymnastics as to why you should keep going, but remember that hopeful feeling in your gut I gave you? It's still there..
Just follow it bro!
 
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