bluupup
cronus
- Jun 7, 2026
- 105
I am so angry. I don't know why its just now, but I am so angry at my father. I adore him so much and that angers me so deeply. it fills me with such a rage, I don't know what to do with myself, other than run to his goddamn apartment and take his sword and stab him. he deserves it. I know he does. I know that I would be valid for doing such a thing. but I cant. not yet. I have to do it when I have nothing left. when I finally destroy everything I have. I long for the day that I am hated by everyone who knows me. I long for the day that they look down on me, not in pity, but in contempt. I need to be truly hated by every person who notices my presence. then, the day will come that I can finally kill my father, and then myself. it will be forever from now, I'm too much of a chicken to ruin these friendships I hold dear. I crave connection, and once I get it, I sever it. and once I do that, it'll be time. I cant wait for that day. that water tower will be waiting for me. I know it always will. I've known that tower for all my life. I could see it through my window when I was a baby. I can see it through my window now. the same white water tower, the one I climbed in junior high and couldn't bring myself to jump off. the one I long for. I know it wants me too.
