All that’s left is to pull the trigger

[isthisthingon]

That's it, that's all it takes. Place the firearm to my head and pull the trigger. Yet, I sit in my sorrow attempting to muster up the courage to take action. Every waking thought is consumed by the exit waiting on my countertop. I load and unload the chamber like a ritual. The ruger talks, it taunts me, "kill yourself, it will all be over, I'll take your pain away."

I've told myself time and again, "if I just had a firearm it would be an easy pull". I dry fire over and over in preparation. The cold steel rattles my head. Practice doesn't make perfect. I remain totally paralyzed waiting for the right moment that will never come.

That's it, that's all it takes. Place the firearm to my head and pull the trigger. Will tomorrow be the day? Or will god answer my prayers and take me in my sleep tonight? God are you listening? Isthisthingon?

 

[bruised_reed]

I keep praying asking God to take me in my sleep too.... I'm sorry you're going through so much pain.

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

i've had the same problem. i haven't been able to pull the trigger

what kind of gun , ruger? i guess it's a 9mm handgun ?

what ammo?

these pro-life and normie brainwashed creeps say it's easy to kill yourself and cowardly . no it takes inhuman courage to kill yourself especially with a gun shooting your own head.

 

[isthisthingon]

i've had the same problem. i haven't been able to pull the trigger

what kind of gun , ruger? i guess it's a 9mm handgun ?

what ammo?

these pro-life and normie brainwashed creeps say it's easy to kill yourself and cowardly . no it takes inhuman courage to kill yourself especially with a gun shooting your own head.

A .357 magnum with 158grain semi-wadcutters. Slightly behind and above the ear will be my shot.

What do you have? How long have you been holding out? It's been a week for me.

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

i have a shotgun and rifle . it's been a while.

 

[isthisthingon]

i have a shotgun and rifle . it's been a while.

it's day by day for me, I can see it becoming an hour by hour thing soon. When it feels right.