Resource After enduring and living with quadriplegia for a decade, he has chosen and been approved for medical assistance in dying

[TAW122]

I just found this Reddit thread, will link it below as well as quote it and it brings me hope to know that there are people who are granted a dignified, peaceful exit especially suffering really long. Keep in mind that while the author wrote it, his friend and caretaker also helped finish with the edits as it is difficult for the author to type due to his ailment and impairment.

I will choose a few questions and answer them on video.
Anything goes. Ask away. I will be available only for a few hours, then will be going to bed to wake up early for the airport.
Accident - mountain biking accident doing a jump. When - in December it will be 10 years. Where am I going? To Switzerland where all this is legal. Reason for going? Tired of life, tired of being taken care of by others. My care has been phenomenal, and has nothing to do with my reasons for wanting to go forward with this decision. I am 40 years old. living in Los Angeles ca. I live with 2 roommates and 2 dogs of which one is my 24 hour caretaker and also my friend of almost 30 years.
Shoutout to the VA spinal cord injury team for all the awesome things they do.
Edit I'm going to sleep. My last night at home. To those who said I was brave, I'm not. If I were brave, I'd push through the adversary and stick around for those who love me. I know I'm running away.
Sorry for the short replies. Typing is a bitch and i had visitors
Last edit. I don't think I can get around to making that video. Sorry. I have to get to the airport soon. Tried to answer as many questions as I can. Like I said, typing is a bitch. I think I read almost all the comments. thank you all. So long and thanks for all the fish
made a quick vid. aram2525 will post later

Edit: April 22, 2024. Aram here: Video link:

What I have to say:

My dear friend Eddie, a constant presence in my life for three decades, drew his final breath on the morning of April 19th in Zurich, Switzerland. Our bond was forged thirty years ago when we first met as neighbors. From those early days, our friendship grew, evolving as we navigated the various stages of our lives together. We were more than just friends; we were schoolmates, military buddies, and eventually, roommates at the time of the fateful accident that would forever change the course of Eddie's life.

Eddie was the epitome of an adrenaline junkie. Among our entire group of friends, he stood out as the most talented and daring rider. Off the road, his trusty Toyota truck was his daily driver and off-roading companion, modified to handle any terrain. He often joked it was ready for the zombie apocalypse, a scenario he eagerly anticipated while watching shows like The Walking Dead. Shooting guns in the desert was one of Eddie's greatest passions and all-time favorite hobbies. On weekends, he could be found playing hockey on his roller blades, showcasing his active and adventurous spirit.

On December 7th, 2014, Eddie went on his last ride. We were mountain biking, a new hobby for the both of us. We attempted a simple log jump, not higher than a couple of feet, but he made a small mistake and went flying over the handlebars and landed on his head. Despite wearing a full face helmet, the impact was too much. In that instant, Eddie was paralyzed from the neck down. In the medical terms, he was a C3 complete quadriplegic.

Eddie was initially optimistic, but as the gravity of his situation became clear, his hope began to wane. Driven by a passion for helping others, he had been working in the ER and was just weeks away from becoming a licensed RN. This made his keen understanding of the severity of his condition all the more heartbreaking.

He eventually returned to live with his parents after spending several months in the hospital, requiring constant 24 hour care. As time passed, he slipped into a deep depression diagnosed with an "adjustment disorder." He completely withdrew from the world, finding solace in Netflix and games like Magic: The Gathering, which he played using a device attached to his head and the device was controlled by his eyes and mouth.

After years of struggling with his condition, Eddie made the decision to travel to Switzerland for medically assisted death. It was the most straightforward path, and he was exhausted from the daily challenges he faced. While there were options available in the US, they required him to establish residency in a specific state for several months before he could proceed. Ultimately, he chose Switzerland. One aspect that deeply saddened Eddie was the fact that he could not donate his organs, as this was not possible through the medically assisted death program. It was a bitter pill to swallow for someone who had always been driven by a desire to help others.

Eddie's decision weighs heavily on all of our hearts, but expecting him to endure such a challenging existence for our sake would have been selfish. Once fiercely independent, he found himself completely reliant on others for even the most basic needs, like scratching an itch—a simple act that never quite felt the same when done by someone else. According to Eddie, it was this total dependency that was the hardest part of his new reality. I believe that if he had retained even a little mobility, like the use of one arm, he would have found the strength to carry on. But the complete loss of his autonomy was a burden too great to bear.

In the last few weeks of his life, Eddie imparted a powerful message to us all: "Don't take anything for granted." His words served as a poignant reminder to appreciate the little things in life, the moments we often dismiss as mundane. Eddie's journey and his ultimate decision to end his suffering underscore the immeasurable value of personal autonomy and the countless daily blessings we frequently fail to recognize. His story is a testament to the importance of cherishing our independence and finding gratitude in the simplest aspects of our lives.

In his final moments, as he lay in the bed where he would take his last breath, Eddie reached for the shot of Pentobarbital with an eagerness that spoke volumes. A liberation from the chains that had bound him for so long. With a grin on his face, he uttered his final words: "I love everybody." I am told there was no hesitation, no second-guessing in his actions. "Life is Good" by Flogging Molly filled the room, Eddie drank the solution, a peaceful smile etched upon his face, and he drifted off to the oblivion he had so often mentioned, finally finding the solace he had been seeking. Rest easy, my dear friend. Though my heart is heavy with your absence, I take comfort in knowing that you are at last free from the burdens that weighed you down. Your memory will be forever cherished by all of us who had the honor of knowing and loving you. Until our paths cross again, I will carry you in my heart, celebrating the beautiful life you lived and the indelible mark you left on this world.

-Aram

This story has a good ending as he is no longer suffering. He is fortunate to have friends and caretakers who respect his wishes and ultimate choice with bodily autonomy. Then also the fact that the medical assistance in dying organization (they didn't name it but I would guess it could be either Dignitas or Pegasos) actually approved him for the service. I recall it is very difficult to get approval for these things and such narrow criteria, even those who have serious physical debilities and ailments still run into hoops and possibility of denial even if they met the criteria. I don't know nor could I say that this would be the case with all people in this or similar predicaments. (Note: I'm not glorifying death or nor am I pushing for people to choose death over living if that's what they want. As a pro-choicer, I respect the wishes of people's bodily autonomy including on whether they wish to (continue to) live or wish to end their suffering. I personally would have chosen what the author, Eddie did, perhaps much sooner and I respect the fact that he endured a whole decade, (10 years) living with this condition and putting up with what difficulties he may face.) Furthermore, reading some of the comments in the AMA thread on Reddit, it seems like quite a few people understood his position and predicament, some even giving their own stories to relate. Most replies in that thread also supported his decision which is a good sign that people are more understanding and relatable when it comes to severe physical debility and impairment.

At any rate, I thought this would be a good thread that I found and brings me some confidence that there are indeed people who do get accepted for medical aid in dying for severe predicaments. I would certainly hope that if I were ever Eddie, that I would be afforded the same treatment and respect towards my choice to exit suffering and avoid an intolerable existence on my own terms. Let me know your thoughts on this article or AMA reddit thread.

 

[anastenka]

Seeing situations like this I can't help but wonder if my suffering is enough to even contemplate ending it. People out there have it so much worse than me and it just makes me feel like such a fraud. I hope he was at peace with himself when he died, it must have been hard living inside your head

 

[FuneralCry]

Rest in peace, at least now that individual is finally unable to suffer and was able to exit peacefully, sounds beyond hellish what he went through, it's so disturbing how humans can suffer to such extreme amounts in this existence.

 

[Jorms_McGander]

I think it's unfortunate that individuals still have to be champions for the right to die, and I think it's fantastic that this one chose that path. It's also unfortunate for somebody to have to leave their country, but Switzerland is a beautiful country so at least you can have coffee with a view on your last day.

I'm very lucky to be Canadian. I'd have access to MAiD in his condition.

 

[TAW122]

Seeing situations like this I can't help but wonder if my suffering is enough to even contemplate ending it. People out there have it so much worse than me and it just makes me feel like such a fraud. I hope he was at peace with himself when he died, it must have been hard living inside your head

Yeah I cannot see myself enduring for over a decade, let alone more than maybe a year or two in this condition. His injuries is quite severe too, enough that he has no use of either arm. As someone who could not simply just be a spectator to existence and also very highly independent as a part of my personality and disposition, I will ALWAYS seek to end suffering than to rot away in that state of existence. This isn't to shame anyone who manages to find solace or end up adapting (or even accepting) such predicaments, but it's simply not for me.

Rest in peace, at least now that individual is finally unable to suffer and was able to exit peacefully, sounds beyond hellish what he went through, it's so disturbing how humans can suffer to such extreme amounts in this existence.

Indeed, and I wished all people who really wish to exit (not limited to those in his predicament or similar ones) are given the peaceful and dignified option to do so.

I think it's unfortunate that individuals still have to be champions for the right to die, and I think it's fantastic that this one chose that path. It's also unfortunate for somebody to have to leave their country, but Switzerland is a beautiful country so at least you can have coffee with a view on your last day.

I'm very lucky to be Canadian. I'd have access to MAiD in his condition.

As someone in the US and living in a state that doesn't even have death with dignity on it's books (not that it would have helped unless one is terminally ill with 6 months or less to live), I wished I lived in countries that have such policies and programs in place. While they may not accept those whose sole underlying condition is mental illness, severe, chronic and debilitating illnesses such as the person in that reddit thread would likely been approved for MAID if he were a Canadian citizen. Sadly, even in his state (California), which has death with dignity, he wouldn't qualify for it because his physical illness is not terminal.

 

[karmaisabitch]

I just found this Reddit thread, will link it below as well as quote it and it brings me hope to know that there are people who are granted a dignified, peaceful exit especially suffering really long. Keep in mind that while the author wrote it, his friend and caretaker also helped finish with the edits as it is difficult for the author to type due to his ailment and impairment.


This story has a good ending as he is no longer suffering. He is fortunate to have friends and caretakers who respect his wishes and ultimate choice with bodily autonomy. Then also the fact that the medical assistance in dying organization (they didn't name it but I would guess it could be either Dignitas or Pegasos) actually approved him for the service. I recall it is very difficult to get approval for these things and such narrow criteria, even those who have serious physical debilities and ailments still run into hoops and possibility of denial even if they met the criteria. I don't know nor could I say that this would be the case with all people in this or similar predicaments. (Note: I'm not glorifying death or nor am I pushing for people to choose death over living if that's what they want. As a pro-choicer, I respect the wishes of people's bodily autonomy including on whether they wish to (continue to) live or wish to end their suffering. I personally would have chosen what the author, Eddie did, perhaps much sooner and I respect the fact that he endured a whole decade, (10 years) living with this condition and putting up with what difficulties he may face.) Furthermore, reading some of the comments in the AMA thread on Reddit, it seems like quite a few people understood his position and predicament, some even giving their own stories to relate. Most replies in that thread also supported his decision which is a good sign that people are more understanding and relatable when it comes to severe physical debility and impairment.

At any rate, I thought this would be a good thread that I found and brings me some confidence that there are indeed people who do get accepted for medical aid in dying for severe predicaments. I would certainly hope that if I were ever Eddie, that I would be afforded the same treatment and respect towards my choice to exit suffering and avoid an intolerable existence on my own terms. Let me know your thoughts on this article or AMA reddit thread.

Do we have to be physically disable to be approved?

 

[TAW122]

Do we have to be physically disable to be approved?

I have never applied for any assisted death programs so I wouldn't know. But if I recall, it's very, very unlikely that those programs would accept applicants whose sole underlying condition is mental illness or a non-physical one. Even those with debilitating physical illnesses may/not always get approved and is still a hard, uphill battle to get the green light for the process. I do think that those whose condition is extremely debilitating and quality of life extremely poor (like the guy in the reddit thread) stands a very high chance of approval.

 

[karmaisabitch]

I have never applied for any assisted death programs so I wouldn't know. But if I recall, it's very, very unlikely that those programs would accept applicants whose sole underlying condition is mental illness or a non-physical one. Even those with debilitating physical illnesses may/not always get approved and is still a hard, uphill battle to get the green light for the process. I do think that those whose condition is extremely debilitating and quality of life extremely poor (like the guy in the reddit thread) stands a very high chance of approval.

Oh ok! Thank you

 

[valentineisbackyall]

I just found this Reddit thread, will link it below as well as quote it and it brings me hope to know that there are people who are granted a dignified, peaceful exit especially suffering really long. Keep in mind that while the author wrote it, his friend and caretaker also helped finish with the edits as it is difficult for the author to type due to his ailment and impairment.


This story has a good ending as he is no longer suffering. He is fortunate to have friends and caretakers who respect his wishes and ultimate choice with bodily autonomy. Then also the fact that the medical assistance in dying organization (they didn't name it but I would guess it could be either Dignitas or Pegasos) actually approved him for the service. I recall it is very difficult to get approval for these things and such narrow criteria, even those who have serious physical debilities and ailments still run into hoops and possibility of denial even if they met the criteria. I don't know nor could I say that this would be the case with all people in this or similar predicaments. (Note: I'm not glorifying death or nor am I pushing for people to choose death over living if that's what they want. As a pro-choicer, I respect the wishes of people's bodily autonomy including on whether they wish to (continue to) live or wish to end their suffering. I personally would have chosen what the author, Eddie did, perhaps much sooner and I respect the fact that he endured a whole decade, (10 years) living with this condition and putting up with what difficulties he may face.) Furthermore, reading some of the comments in the AMA thread on Reddit, it seems like quite a few people understood his position and predicament, some even giving their own stories to relate. Most replies in that thread also supported his decision which is a good sign that people are more understanding and relatable when it comes to severe physical debility and impairment.

At any rate, I thought this would be a good thread that I found and brings me some confidence that there are indeed people who do get accepted for medical aid in dying for severe predicaments. I would certainly hope that if I were ever Eddie, that I would be afforded the same treatment and respect towards my choice to exit suffering and avoid an intolerable existence on my own terms. Let me know your thoughts on this article or AMA reddit thread.

"I just kill time, that's all I do." Whew, that resonated with me when he said that.

Did you happen to post the link to the Reddit or did I overlook it?

 

[TAW122]

It is there in my original post. I hyperlinked the word 'thread' after the word Reddit.

 

[J&L383]

Seeing situations like this I can't help but wonder if my suffering is enough to even contemplate ending it. People out there have it so much worse than me and it just makes me feel like such a fraud. I hope he was at peace with himself when he died, it must have been hard living inside your head

I agree. Many suffer worse than I can imagine, and yet somehow they do. There are many with quadriplegia who manage to live out their lives, it's all a matter of perspective and what an individual is capable of dealing with.

I have never applied for any assisted death programs so I wouldn't know. But if I recall, it's very, very unlikely that those programs would accept applicants whose sole underlying condition is mental illness or a non-physical one. Even those with debilitating physical illnesses may/not always get approved and is still a hard, uphill battle to get the green light for the process. I do think that those whose condition is extremely debilitating and quality of life extremely poor (like the guy in the reddit thread) stands a very high chance of approval.

Yes, it is not a hard science. Mental illness alone is tricky but not impossible (longstanding, untreatable is what they look for). Physical illnesses are subject to reviews, but if a patient is claiming severe debilitating conditions and there is at least some medical objective evidence supporting that, then generally there's a good chance you'll get approved. And age shouldn't be an issue but the older you get, the easier it is. (There was the hundred-year-old man who basically was "healthy" (for his age) but had just grown tired of life).

Do we have to be physically disable to be approved?

No. But some of the main reasons are motor neuron diseases (ALS, MS), cancer, cardiovascular and pulmonary diseases. Even diabetes, blindness, and deafness are mentioned.

 

[Sooverit]

Truly amazing story, may he rest in peace

 

[J&L383]

Seeing situations like this I can't help but wonder if my suffering is enough to even contemplate ending it. People out there have it so much worse than me and it just makes me feel like such a fraud. I hope he was at peace with himself when he died, it must have been hard living inside your head

It gave me pause, too. Eddie gave it a go. But the quadriplegia just eventually wore him down, I don't know if I could have lasted that long.

 

[maniac116]

I just found this Reddit thread, will link it below as well as quote it and it brings me hope to know that there are people who are granted a dignified, peaceful exit especially suffering really long. Keep in mind that while the author wrote it, his friend and caretaker also helped finish with the edits as it is difficult for the author to type due to his ailment and impairment.


This story has a good ending as he is no longer suffering. He is fortunate to have friends and caretakers who respect his wishes and ultimate choice with bodily autonomy. Then also the fact that the medical assistance in dying organization (they didn't name it but I would guess it could be either Dignitas or Pegasos) actually approved him for the service. I recall it is very difficult to get approval for these things and such narrow criteria, even those who have serious physical debilities and ailments still run into hoops and possibility of denial even if they met the criteria. I don't know nor could I say that this would be the case with all people in this or similar predicaments. (Note: I'm not glorifying death or nor am I pushing for people to choose death over living if that's what they want. As a pro-choicer, I respect the wishes of people's bodily autonomy including on whether they wish to (continue to) live or wish to end their suffering. I personally would have chosen what the author, Eddie did, perhaps much sooner and I respect the fact that he endured a whole decade, (10 years) living with this condition and putting up with what difficulties he may face.) Furthermore, reading some of the comments in the AMA thread on Reddit, it seems like quite a few people understood his position and predicament, some even giving their own stories to relate. Most replies in that thread also supported his decision which is a good sign that people are more understanding and relatable when it comes to severe physical debility and impairment.

At any rate, I thought this would be a good thread that I found and brings me some confidence that there are indeed people who do get accepted for medical aid in dying for severe predicaments. I would certainly hope that if I were ever Eddie, that I would be afforded the same treatment and respect towards my choice to exit suffering and avoid an intolerable existence on my own terms. Let me know your thoughts on this article or AMA reddit thread.