Accepting death

[flutebloom]

For a long time I couldn't fully accept the fact that I need to CTB because there were certain things that I felt were worth living for. Like my pets, friends, a hope for the future, achieving things, experiencing things.

All of that is gone now and while I do have deep despair for the fact that I'll never achieve what I wanted in this life, there's a huge part of me that is actually quite thrilled and excited about dying. Like I'm so curious to see what happens after death. If it's just nothing or something more.

I think our bodies are hardwired to fear death even if we want to die. That itself makes me wonder why it seems like even against our will we are tied to this dimension. But I really feel like I'm beginning to unlearn that. I'm starting to really look forward to dying in an almost giddy way.

Is anyone else really curious and excited about what comes after death? If only the act of killing oneself wasn't so difficult or violent. Like to me jumping, hanging, poisoning… the common ways of suicide are gruesome and undesirable. I'm sure anyone of us would rather die peacefully but it's not really possible. So I think for most of us the suffering is so great that there's no choice really other than to pick a gruesome method… like I'm currently thinking of the jumping method.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm more dreading what comes after- if I'm honest. I can't see it as being good. In terms of- if this world had a 'designer', I don't want to experience anything else they created. I can sort of understand the fascination of exploring new worlds and having better experiences, not so limited as being on this world. Still again- same designer (presumably.) Why would they necessarily have made things better in the next world? Why did they enable so much suffering here? It points to human character traits I don't want to be subjugated to- again.

I am excited about ending this life though. Being free of responsibilities, expectations, never ending chores. I can't wait for a rest basically. Even if I don't get to fully comprehend or value it.

 

[Apathy79]

I suppose it brings forward the same excitement that might otherwise be delayed many years or decades. Like if you said I'm going to Greenland in 3 decades vs 3 days, the excitement levels are different, even though the destination is unchanged. But I'm still going to the same place. Tricky one. I assume it's energised by the excitement about ending the pain of this life.

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

I am excited to not exist forever

There is nothing after Death

1 micro-second after my brain dies its non-existence forever after that. Eternal non-existence is the only guarantee of never suffering so bad its a trillion times worse than u can imagine.

Only permanent non-existence can guarantee safety from extreme suffering. So only Non-existence forever is the only perfection. Eternal non-existence


We all will die anyway

Every organism descended from the same one cell ancestor

All Life on Earth Today Descended From a Single Cell. Meet LUCA. | Quanta Magazine

The clearest picture yet of our “last universal common ancestor” suggests it was a relatively complex organism living 4.2 billion years ago, a time long considered too harsh for life to flourish.

www.quantamagazine.org

A human is just cells, a machine, an animal, chemical reactions, a bug. Does a machine have an afterlife ? No. I am that first cell

A human is just a brain that can suffer unending constant unbearable pain

The brain cells connect to create the illusion there is something different from
Just cells

 

[cemeteryismyhome]

I long for death, I'm begging for it and can't wait. Not afraid at all. Don't care if or what comes after.

 

[dust-in-the-wind]

If there is something after death I don't want to be conscious to know about it.

 

[Griever]

I've accepted my own death, but I'll never be able to accept the death of my best friend

 

[Apokryphiel]

You don't ever really have to accept it. There's so much I refuse to accept in this life; even I struggle to accept the fact that this is my only option. It's not about acceptance, it's about having the strength to overcome that frustration and doing what you need to do. Killing yourself isn't just some easy way out; it's the culmination of all this suffering you have experienced throughout your life and the responsibility you have to take that final step. It was never our choice - this is what the world has made of us.

 

[flutebloom]

I long for death, I'm begging for it and can't wait. Not afraid at all. Don't care if or what comes after.

I feel the same way

If there is something after death I don't want to be conscious to know about it.

I really hope what comes after death is just nothing

You don't ever really have to accept it. There's so much I refuse to accept in this life; even I struggle to accept the fact that this is my only option. It's not about acceptance, it's about having the strength to overcome that frustration and doing what you need to do. Killing yourself isn't just some easy way out; it's the culmination of all this suffering you have experienced throughout your life and the responsibility you have to take that final step. It was never our choice - this is what the world has made of us.

Yes… I struggle to accept it as well but I think I'm finally accepting it. I think accepting it will make it easier for me personally to take that final step and let go.

 

[FuneralCry]

I just want to be free from all the suffering as well, I just wish for the peace of non-existence where all is finally gone, for me ceasing to exist would be the only relief as I believe death to simply be non-existence and I'd just never wish for this futile, torturous existence that just causes so much suffering, pain and problems that there were never a need for at all, I hope you find peace.

 

[LastDayOnEarth]

I accepted death and I found the peace I have always longed for

 

[Gustav Hartmann]

The curiosity about what happens after death is the worst reason to kill oneself as we will know it anyhow some day.
If I believe that there is nothing after death and that not existing is better than existing it might be a valid reason not to wait until natural death. Another reason could be, that I want to experience a certain way to die.

 

[polm]

My date can't come quick enough. Too much suffering. Joy has gone. The pain and torment that is my body will be over.

 

[2messdup]

I want to end my pointless painful existence and believe there is nothing after. Whenever I get into the tunnel vision that would make it possible to ctb I cling on to it with both hands but every time so far, SI or other people have disturbed the single mindedness. It'll come one day though.

 

[Mooncry]

I'm curious but terrified. I have an idea of what comes personally for me after death, but I'm so scared of it not being real, and that's what keeps me tethered here. It's a stupid reason because, truly, I win either way. If I die and it's real, I get what I've always wanted. If I die and it's not real, I won't even be conscious of it nor able to care, and my pain and uncertainty will be no more.

But somehow, my logical brain can't see through the fog wall of fear… As you can imagine, my SI weaponizes the hell out of my strong emotional ties to my spiritual beliefs. I know it needs to be done eventually though, and I feel like I'm getting closer to overcoming this hellish cycle.

 

[catfriend]

Is anyone else really curious and excited about what comes after death?

i'm 50% curious and 50% excited. i'm assuming that nothing comes after death -- just oblivion; the inverse of the time before i was born. but the living don't know anything for sure (much as they claim to!)

i've had several dreams about dying, over the years, and they all had a positive sentiment about them. there was the excitement of finally getting to 'find out', followed by a calm, peaceful slipping away into black. i'm hoping for something along those lines, when my time comes for real. :)

 

[JesiBel]

Death never seemed to me to be something evil or something to be feared. I was always very curious about what my last moments and thoughts will be like, when everything finally fades away and ends. Rather than a peaceful death, I prefer a quick one, which is why I chose a "violent method." I am a person of strong emotions and feelings, impulsive and aggressive. It will be a way to show how much I hate my existence and this world. After all, I haven't had a serene life either. So, I will "save myself" by seeking death.