Abusive Ex's 'Suicide Attempt'

[Giraffey]

Yesterday, I found out that my abusive ex-partner had taken an overdose of paracetamol and had spent the last few days in the hospital as a result. One could be forgiven for having sympathy, but she has a long history of such 'overdoses' and has even been known to fake them for attention.

I recall with considerable embarrassment one episode in which I got a frantic call from my then-partner at work, she had overdosed on paracetamol and was drifting in and out of consciousness. I rushed home to discover several empty pill packets next to her, I promptly called an ambulance. Fast forward a few hours and I found myself arguing with a doctor over the results of her blood test, which had come back showing very low levels of paracetamol in her bloodstream which was roughly estimated to be the equivalent of her having ingested around three or four tablets. My reaction was a good example of what happens when you are being gaslighted. I won't detail the abuse I suffered at her hands, physical, emotional, sexual, I've done so at length in other threads; she is a nasty person.

Against that background, I hope you can forgive me for expressing my joy at the circumstances of my ex-partner's life taking such a downward turn, some may call it schadenfreude but I prefer to think of it as karma.

If you're still not convinced, here is a quote from the social media update she posted referring to the event:

Last week I took an almost fatal overdose in an attempt to take my own life. If it wasn't for paramedics and doctors I wouldn't be here now as the level of poison in my blood was extremely high. Please everyone check in those who are vulnerable.

Could this have been a genuine attempt? Given the history and circumstances, I doubt it very much; far more likely to be the latest histrionic manoeuvre from an abusive, narcissistic parasite; a tumour bitter at her excision from my life; desperate for the sympathy and attention of anyone ignorant of her true colours.

So I hope you'll forgive me for raising a glass this evening, to karma.

 

[Sk1n1M1n]

If she's spent a few days in hospital i clearly doubt it would a be a fake attempt and unless she's told she's at the hospital and she's actually with a friend or family member, even location details on Facebook can be faked.
but the doctors also would keep her in if she's attempted and if she displaying other behaviours i.e wanting to self harm further, end her life

 

[Giraffey]

If she's spent a few days in hospital i clearly doubt it would a be a fake attempt and unless she's told she's at the hospital and she's actually with a friend or family member, even location details on Facebook can be faked.
but the doctors also would keep her in if she's attempted and if she displaying other behaviours i.e wanting to self harm further, end her life

I wasn't implying this attempt was fake, just that she has faked attempts in the past as part of a continuing pattern of attention-seeking behaviour. I expect what's happened is that she's overdosed on paracetamol (as is her MO), called an ambulance herself or positioned herself where she would be readily discovered, and the paramedics and ward staff have administered the antidote.

My point being that she had no intention of ending her life, she wanted attention. Bear in mind this is from a woman who has faked having cancer on two occasions and faked being raped on at least two occasions - again, all for attention or emotional blackmail.

 

[TheQ22]

Faked having cancer. Oh My God!

 

[Giraffey]

Faked having cancer. Oh My God!

Once to try and get back with an ex-boyfriend, she faked having cancer and treatment during their relationship and later faked being in remission, and a couple of years later she pretended to have a terminal brain tumour to try and get back together with me. I think that gives you a sense of what kind of person she is. I know some people on this site make suicidal gestures and this post is definitely not a dig at them - my ex is just in a different league of manipulative.

 

[cyberlordsumit]

Things people do in life. I'd soon be dead and faraway from this mockery.

 

[Sk1n1M1n]

But perhaps she needs psychological support herself as there could come a time when she's overdosed so many times that she's damaged her liver and other organs that she needs an organ transplantation

 

[Giraffey]

But perhaps she needs psychological support herself as there could come a time when she's overdosed so many times that she's damaged her liver and other organs that she needs an organ transplantation

You may call me cold-hearted, but I really couldn't care what level of psychological support my abuser requires; nor if she leaves it too late one day and damages her liver. I don't wish harm upon anybody, but I certainly won't lose any sleep if the woman who destroyed my entire life and left me begging for death, is finally beginning to suffer the way I and others have suffered at her hands.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I've been reading a book about how to communicate with high conflict personalities. It's helping me understand when a criticism or conflict is about the issue or about the person.

I don't have the whole picture of course, but your stories about your ex show that she definitely has a lot of conflicts and doesn't agree to resolution for them, because they're about her and not the issues. She's not capable of being satisfied a conflict is resolved until the person is destroyed, then there is no more conflict. After that, she'll find a new target she is dissatisfied with and start all over again, in addition to all the current people she has going who are conflicts. It's like their existence is perceived as an aggression toward her own.

I find it interesting that she made her social media post public rather than only shared with friends. It seems like virtue signaling, and that she is a martyr for the greater good, exposing her experience to educate others. There's automatic conflict set up with anyone of her social media contacts who doesn't rush to soothe her and and check on her. But I would be willing to bet that there's someone in particular she's targeting with that post to stealth shame, who didn't check in with her. There's so much fodder in that post for a variety of individual conflicts, and also for bolstering her public image in a narcissistic way as admirable and elevated.

There's an active thread regarding a quote about mental illness not being one's fault but being their responsibility. I get the impression she's making others responsible for comforting her and keeping an eye out, and if they don't, then they have responsibility for her attempts because she is helpless and they need to step up and step in. If they do, they are walking into a trap. If they don't, they are walking into a trap. Being anywhere in her sphere is a trap that can be sprung without warning at any time.

 

[puppy9]

I've been reading a book about how to communicate with high conflict personalities. It's helping me understand when a criticism or conflict is about the issue or about the person.

sorry for hijacking this thread.

Title of the book please? Thanks appreciate it.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

sorry for hijacking this thread.

Title of the book please? Thanks appreciate it.

The title is BIFF. It's an acronym.

 

[Eren]

Get away from that person as much as you can, use suicide as emotional blackmail, fake cancer and make up that you have been raped ... he is a really toxic person. I'm sorry you had to be with someone like that.

 

[woxihuanni]

I don't have the whole picture of course, but your stories about your ex show that she definitely has a lot of conflicts and doesn't agree to resolution for them, because they're about her and not the issues. She's not capable of being satisfied a conflict is resolved until the person is destroyed, then there is no more conflict. After that, she'll find a new target she is dissatisfied with and start all over again, in addition to all the current people she has going who are conflicts. It's like their existence is perceived as an aggression toward her own.

You have just described my partner.

 

[cyberlordsumit]

Guys, Might come off as bit too off from the opinions of this thread, But i believe we know better that we all have been having thorns in our lives that make us do many mistakes and the compunding 'persona' is often bullshit.. We may even become some kind of monster..

I do not know any solution, but i know everyone's got a struggle, and most people aren't born bad, their experiences make them that way.. I don't know what's the solution. But maybe that's why I'd rather CTB than subject myself to more Dehumanising circumstances.. These 'toxic people' may also be in similar circumstances wondering wtf is wrong with them trying to find the answers..

Idk what and why I'm saying.. just be kind. idk

 

[Giraffey]

Guys, Might come off as bit too off from the opinions of this thread, But i believe we know better that we all have been having thorns in our lives that make us do many mistakes and the compunding 'persona' is often bullshit.. We may even become some kind of monster..

I do not know any solution, but i know everyone's got a struggle, and most people aren't born bad, their experiences make them that way.. I don't know what's the solution. But maybe that's why I'd rather CTB than subject myself to more Dehumanising circumstances.. These 'toxic people' may also be in similar circumstances wondering wtf is wrong with them trying to find the answers..

Idk what and why I'm saying.. just be kind. idk

On one occasion I confronted my ex-partner about cheating, she picked up a sheet of glass and tried to murder me. I dropped to my knees and begged for my life. Mercifully, she settled for beating me with a board and nail.

I know many people on here who have been abused and have various kinds of psychological trauma and disorder. They have chosen not to abuse anyone.

@GoodPersonEffed hit the nail on the head with her insightful theory, my ex-partner thrives on conflict and will not stop until she has destroyed me and the others in her life.

No matter what her motivation, please don't try to justify or excuse her behaviour. I have had to fight this kind of prejudice for years, her psychological issues do not justify her abusive actions.

 

[LittleJem]

@SlowMo I am so pleased you are safely away from this woman. I am also so sorry to hear about everything you have gone through. I entirely understand your schadenfreude.

 

[cyberlordsumit]

On one occasion I confronted my ex-partner about cheating, she picked up a sheet of glass and tried to murder me. I dropped to my knees and begged for my life. Mercifully, she settled for beating me with a board and nail.

I know many people on here who have been abused and have various kinds of psychological trauma and disorder. They have chosen not to abuse anyone.

@GoodPersonEffed hit the nail on the head with her insightful theory, my ex-partner thrives on conflict and will not stop until she has destroyed me and the others in her life.

No matter what her motivation, please don't try to justify or excuse her behaviour. I have had to fight this kind of prejudice for years, her psychological issues do not justify her abusive actions.

i have never tried justified anyone's action on here.

rather i myself was sexually assaulted, and i see how people are just victims of this "Chaos Theory" or "Cause and Effect". It makes me feel nothing. I no longer feel either compassion or hatred or aversion towards anyone..

This is a vicious cycle which will never stop because The eye for an eye continues.. Forever and ever, like a rollercoaster.

It's as if nobody is trying to solve the maze and the maze gets complicated more and more..

After i have been through 7 abusive relationships, Sexual Assualt, Molestation, Bullying, Physical abuse, I now come to a conclusion that there is no answer to solve this..

Utopia itself means "No Place" in its root form..
I personally believe this is hell, There's only one way out. But that is my answer. To let go once and for all..

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Guys, Might come off as bit too off from the opinions of this thread, But i believe we know better that we all have been having thorns in our lives that make us do many mistakes and the compunding 'persona' is often bullshit.. We may even become some kind of monster..

I do not know any solution, but i know everyone's got a struggle, and most people aren't born bad, their experiences make them that way.. I don't know what's the solution. But maybe that's why I'd rather CTB than subject myself to more Dehumanising circumstances.. These 'toxic people' may also be in similar circumstances wondering wtf is wrong with them trying to find the answers..

Idk what and why I'm saying.. just be kind. idk

i have never tried justified anyone's action on here.

rather i myself was sexually assaulted, and i see how people are just victims of this "Chaos Theory" or "Cause and Effect". It makes me feel nothing. I no longer feel either compassion or hatred or aversion towards anyone..

This is a vicious cycle which will never stop because The eye for an eye continues.. Forever and ever, like a rollercoaster.

It's as if nobody is trying to solve the maze and the maze gets complicated more and more..

After i have been through 7 abusive relationships, Sexual Assualt, Molestation, Bullying, Physical abuse, I now come to a conclusion that there is no answer to solve this..

Utopia itself means "No Place" in its root form..
I personally believe this is hell, There's only one way out. But that is my answer. To let go once and for all..

If you have such a history, then it makes sense that you seek to protect abusers from our anger and rejection. It makes sense that you were conditioned to enable them and be a flying monkey for them. I'm glad you have answers for yourself, but I will determine for myself when kindness is required, and what that looks like. I've had enough shame from both abusers and fellow victims. I don't hate you, I just want to point out that your exhortations are negating and are off the mark in this conversation.

 

[cyberlordsumit]

@GoodPersonEffed again, I have not protected anyone, I have only stated what i feel for myself, (that hatred is being compunded), and that I'm freeing myself.

I do not know why you needed to take it personally or why you had to say you didn't hate me, because I didn't address it to anyone but stated that We should know how it must feel.

It's true what happened to The OP was bad taking the words, But Maybe we all know hate gets us nowhere..

Indeed walking away and having justice is one way. I never denied that.

But hating is not the answer. That's all I said.

let me know if anyone wants my mesages taken down if speaking a little about kindness is an offense here.

 

[Acopia]

Sure a lot of people on here know this but..

Treatment for paracetamol OD lasts for 21 hours minimum. The threshold for needing the treatment is quite low, because of how toxic paracetamol is.
Therefore, one could take a relatively low amount in OD (it depends on the person's weight - for me it's about 32 tablets/ 16 grams) and still require a few days in hospital to be treated.
-A.

 

[Sherri]

Paracetamol? That's that evil harm you? I agree with other people here, you should get away.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

let me know if anyone wants my mesages taken down

Letting you know that I want them taken down.