I haven't been on here in a couple months so I just wanted to give a random update about me for anyone who cares.
The main thing that has happened is that I've realized I'm not really depressed anymore. I was just thinking and reflecting and realized how much I've changed since last year and in general. I'm not as angry about things. I actually am not pissed at my parents as much as I used to be. I still have my moments with them and they still definitely were a main contributer to how my mental health has been but by this point they've improved and while I'll always have issues with how they raised me, I've changed and I'm trying harder to actually have a relationship with them. So that's a thing.
I don't know for sure if my depression is gone fully because I in the past have been fine mentally but then I just completely drop and go into a suicidal episode for a couple days to a week so I don't know if that's still a thing but when it comes to daily life I don't think I am. Or at least not as much as I used to be. (I'm someone who is really bad at being able to identify my emotions so that's why I'm like I dunno for sure however my mental health is at the best it's been)
As for suicide I don't know if it's still something on the table for me. I think it is because it's still been a big part of my life (that sounds weird but I mean I've dealt with suicidal thoughts and thought about suicide for 7 years so) and I kinda want to decide when I die.
The main thing I deal with now is anxiety. I'm thinking about taking anxiety meds for it but also I'm really bad at taking pills and I've always heard pretty bad things when it comes to meds for mental health. Has anyone tried anxiety meds and had it work for them?
Other small updates is that I got a job. It's just at a fast food place, nothing big. But my managers aren't bad (unlike my last job). There is one issue with the job but I still dunno if I'm gonna post about it yet but if I am I'll post it later.
I dunno this is a mostly positive post but when I'm typing this I'm actually pretty sad and I don't really know why? Emotions just be emotioning for no reason.
Anyways thank you if you read this.
The main thing that has happened is that I've realized I'm not really depressed anymore. I was just thinking and reflecting and realized how much I've changed since last year and in general. I'm not as angry about things. I actually am not pissed at my parents as much as I used to be. I still have my moments with them and they still definitely were a main contributer to how my mental health has been but by this point they've improved and while I'll always have issues with how they raised me, I've changed and I'm trying harder to actually have a relationship with them. So that's a thing.
I don't know for sure if my depression is gone fully because I in the past have been fine mentally but then I just completely drop and go into a suicidal episode for a couple days to a week so I don't know if that's still a thing but when it comes to daily life I don't think I am. Or at least not as much as I used to be. (I'm someone who is really bad at being able to identify my emotions so that's why I'm like I dunno for sure however my mental health is at the best it's been)
As for suicide I don't know if it's still something on the table for me. I think it is because it's still been a big part of my life (that sounds weird but I mean I've dealt with suicidal thoughts and thought about suicide for 7 years so) and I kinda want to decide when I die.
The main thing I deal with now is anxiety. I'm thinking about taking anxiety meds for it but also I'm really bad at taking pills and I've always heard pretty bad things when it comes to meds for mental health. Has anyone tried anxiety meds and had it work for them?
Other small updates is that I got a job. It's just at a fast food place, nothing big. But my managers aren't bad (unlike my last job). There is one issue with the job but I still dunno if I'm gonna post about it yet but if I am I'll post it later.
I dunno this is a mostly positive post but when I'm typing this I'm actually pretty sad and I don't really know why? Emotions just be emotioning for no reason.
Anyways thank you if you read this.
