Venting ... :(

[enlightened_suicide]

I don't wanna live .. I know that is a common topic on this site .. but I have tried most options offered and without this forum to no avail..
I have finally ordered my SN today and I'm gonna take an ungodly amount just to make sure this actually works bc after so many years and them failing .. i AM OVER THIS SHIT AN WANT AN EFFECTIVE WAY TO LEAVE THIS SHITHOLE
I am hurting .. I hate this life... I hate psychwards ... I hate failing .. I am so numb .. I cannot stand myself.. I AM NUMB ... I have tried to die and I have tried to live and I am finally at peace with it ...I no longer want 2 live 120% and I cannot wait to feel the peace that I have felt momentarily but not long enough..
I cannot hardly wait to be apart f the spirit realm..

I'm sorry if it sounds stupid I have been drinking but that still does not numb me wanting to feel this I have felt when I have died and wanting to join the others.


..... Just wanting the afterlife to finally take me after all this suffering.

 

[_Minsk]

trueee!
do you had a nde? would be interesting to hear your story, love your signature btw!

 

[enlightened_suicide]

trueee!
do you had a nde? would be interesting to hear your story, love your signature btw!

I will make a thread on it, I just sat here starting to type it and I feel as if it is wayyy too much riiip
and thank you!! <3

 

[enlightened_suicide]

trueee!
do you had a nde? would be interesting to hear your story, love your signature btw!

I'm sorry how long it is in advance..

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/deaths-breath.29847/