You should be thankful, some people have it worse

[brokeandbroken]

Why do people say this? Is the fact that the majority of people on earth are poor supposed to comfort me? Am I supposed to say "You're right, thank god I'm not like those people. Thank you for reminding me that the majority of people are poor, live under an authoritarian regime, or both. The fact that so many people are suffering really makes me happy." Do people who think like this have no empathy?
It's such a stupid thing to compare people's issues. Just because one isn't as "dire" as the other doesn't mean it's not a problem anymore.

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I feel like it depends. I think there's a point where it's different levels of suffering. Where you go from living and/or thriving to just suffering. At the point does it matter?

 

[Plato'sCaveDweller]

Oh I fucking hate this one.

I can say little about it except that Schopenhauer absolutely annihilated this remark:

The best consolation in misfortune or affliction of any kind will be the thought of other people who are in a still worse plight than yourself; and this is a form of consolation open to everyone. But what an awful fate this means for mankind as a whole!

So if you're simply an unenlightened self-interested individual, with little care for anything but yourself, then this very well may be a good way to cope. But anyone whose concerns extend beyond their own should immediately recognize that this is a laughable form of a consolation, and is more like rubbing salt in one's wounds. Other people have it worse than me? Fuck! Go ahead and make me feel worse, why don't you? That's supposed to make me want to stick around longer in this hellhole?

 

[Morte]

most people have it better than me, even if the quality of their life is worse, because I'm sure most people are not depressed. I shouldn't be grateful at all for a life I didn't ask for and that is more miserable than most others.

Besides, this logic is psychopathic, as you expect people to be in worse situations than you , so you can feel better about yourself.

 

[Darkover]

bump

 

[SoulWhisperer]

Even if one year late, yes, I agree with you. Just because a problem isn't as bad as another doesn't mean it's not a problem anymore... :(

 

[L'absent]

The phrase "You should be grateful, some people are worse off" is one of those comments that makes your skin crawl. The person who says it isn't trying to help, comfort, or give any useful advice. No, they're just trying to put you down, minimize what you're going through, using the excuse that someone else has it worse. The reality is that the person saying this is just satisfied knowing someone else is suffering because somehow, they feel better knowing they're not the only one unhappy.
This phrase isn't about empathy; it's a sneaky way to make you feel guilty for your pain, as if it's not serious enough to deserve attention. The person saying it doesn't want you to get better, they just want you to stop complaining and feel bad for even feeling upset. In their head, the pain of others is just a way to tell you to shut up and stop feeling so bad, because, after all, someone has it worse.
But the truth is, the person who uses this phrase has no intention of listening to you, understanding you, or helping you. They're just trying to put themselves above you, probably to feel luckier or "stronger" than the situation. Their happiness depends on someone else suffering more than them. It's a petty mentality that feeds off seeing others down to feel better, as if suffering is some sort of competition where you need to prove you're doing better than others.
If they really wanted to be supportive, all it would take is a "I understand" or just listening without making comparisons. But no, with this phrase, they just want to make it seem like your pain doesn't count. It's a phrase that should be completely eliminated, because every time it's said, it only undermines your experience and perpetuates a way of thinking that is anything but empathetic.

 

[singingcrow]

I try everything I can to be grateful for what I have