
Cloud Busting
Formerly pinkribbonscars
- Sep 9, 2023
- 481
What the hell… does that even mean?
I mean I've certainly entered recovery to avoid consequences or to get people off my back, and most certainly it wasn't what I truly wanted at the time.
Even now though, as a person who genuinely wants to recover, and increase my wellbeing, this still leaves me dumbfounded. Who even am I? Do I even matter as a tiny speck in the universe? Why would I do things for me? I do things because all people are the fabric of the universe. My bothers and sisters, my family, my tribe, the earth, the cosmos… these are grander for me. I want to live for these things, not for myself. I'm nothing special. To live for myself seems… sad and shallow
Yet I hear it all the time- especially in the context of addiction- that I ought to recover for me. It feels like such a neoliberal, capitalistic "pull yourself by your bootstraps" mentality to me. I live for a grander purpose, for the collective greater good, not for myself… individualism doesn't appeal to me. Yet if I say this to normies it's as if I've grown two heads.
I don't think these are bad reasons to acquire motivation at all. I wonder what yall think, since you guys seem to dig a lil deeper than the average populace
I mean I've certainly entered recovery to avoid consequences or to get people off my back, and most certainly it wasn't what I truly wanted at the time.
Even now though, as a person who genuinely wants to recover, and increase my wellbeing, this still leaves me dumbfounded. Who even am I? Do I even matter as a tiny speck in the universe? Why would I do things for me? I do things because all people are the fabric of the universe. My bothers and sisters, my family, my tribe, the earth, the cosmos… these are grander for me. I want to live for these things, not for myself. I'm nothing special. To live for myself seems… sad and shallow
Yet I hear it all the time- especially in the context of addiction- that I ought to recover for me. It feels like such a neoliberal, capitalistic "pull yourself by your bootstraps" mentality to me. I live for a grander purpose, for the collective greater good, not for myself… individualism doesn't appeal to me. Yet if I say this to normies it's as if I've grown two heads.
I don't think these are bad reasons to acquire motivation at all. I wonder what yall think, since you guys seem to dig a lil deeper than the average populace