You ever wake up panicking?

[Mecha Man]

This question is mainly directed at people with a lot of anxiety and depression, but anyone can answer. I have no major physical problems. I'm unemployed at the moment, but I'm currently fully supported by my family. But lately I sometimes wake up suddenly feeling an enormous amount of anxiety. It almost feels like a mini panic attack. Sometimes I wake up feeling perfectly normal too (i.e. good), just FYI.

Most of the time when this happens I don't even know why I'm upset. I just wake up and the feelings are there; all I can think about are things like, "why is this happening to me," "somebody help me," "somebody kill me," etc. etc.

Just to clarify I have a few good personal reasons to get anxious, but in these cases when I wake up I'm not even thinking about any particular thing; I just wake up with those overpowering negative emotions. It's even worse when I wake up in the middle of the night, because I don't really have the option of talking to anyone, unless I really felt desperate enough I guess.

I know there's a lot of you that just suffer all the time. But for me, a lot of the time I spend going through my life I genuinely feel good, and while I'm forced to live I need to develop better coping mechanisms, so any advice would be helpful. I've tried meditation many times in the past, and either I'm not very good at it or it just doesn't help. But (here I am, saying it again) someone, please help me.

 

[RememberWhatUCameFor]

do you take any supplements or medications?

 

[21Neberg]

I have this all the time as well, exactly as you described. I too wake up in the middle of the night, anxious about a lot of things in my life. I often cut myself to calm down again, but I don't recommend it.

 

[siray]

I have this all the time as well, exactly as you described. I too wake up in the middle of the night, anxious about a lot of things in my life. I often cut myself to calm down again, but I don't recommend it.

I could never understand why people cut themselves. Is it a manifestation of self-hatred, are you trying to distract yourself from the crippling anxiety? Help me understand.

I do wake up at night sometimes, due to bladder mostly.And in a few seconds, I am engulfed by thoughts of death. I wouldn't call it panic per se, but the thoughts put me in a deep state of misery and I try to think which method is best for CTB but I am unable to proceed with my thoughts because I just feel so damn miserable and cold inside. Helpless and disgusted at the fact that I don't have a convenient means to CTB (shotgun, Nembutal etc.)

 

[Help_Me]

Right here with you, guys. I wake up in panic almost every single day. Probably this is a result of my anxious dreams as well. The worst part is waking up not knowing what exactly you were dreaming about..

 

[21Neberg]

could never understand why people cut themselves. Is it a manifestation of self-hatred, are you trying to distract yourself from the crippling anxiety? Help me understand.

I understand. It's incredibly hard for non-self harmers to understand why people do it. I'll try to explain why I do it, seeing as everyone's reason is a little bit different.

Personally, I cut not only because I hate myself, but also to cope with feelings of rejection and loneliness. Often times, whenever something slightly bad happens to me, my first thought is where I'm going to cut myself that night. Even if I have an OK day, I'll still feel the urge to cut myself before I go to sleep. It is a bit of an addiction in that sense. Aside from all this, I enjoy seeing myself bleed and I like seeing the scars - kind of as a punishment for myself.

 

[JustAboutDone]

Right here with you, guys. I wake up in panic almost every single day. Probably this is a result of my anxious dreams as well. The worst part is waking up not knowing what exactly you were dreaming about..

Totally with you here. I wake up panicky, heart pounding from nightmares both during the night and in the morning. I'd rather not sleep at all tbh. It takes me a good hour after waking to stop feeling scared and shaking and actually be able to do anything. Sad case I am!

 

[Mecha Man]

do you take any supplements or medications?

Yeah, I've been taking Zoloft and Valium since 2007, although about a or two ago my doctor switched me from Zoloft to Lexapro. I'm -supposed- to take 30 mgs of both every day, but over the years I've abused my valium prescription and gradually taken more and more at a time. These days my prescription runs out pretty fast most of the time, and so I have to go most of the month without it. I also have issues with alcoholism. Typically when a tangible thing triggers a lot of depression and misery, I get really really drunk.

This substance abuse problem with alcohol and valium is obviously bad, but that's just one of many things I struggle with. I know there are ways to get better in the long run. At the very least, I know I could start trying to eat healthier, exercising, and losing some weight. But, as I've said in one or more other threads, I have severe self motivation problems. forget exercising; I have a hard time finding the motivation to shower and brush my teeth every day. I feel like I have absolutely no self control whatsoever. I feel like some kind of robot, just a slave to the whims of my body.

I spend all day on the computer, watching movies/t.v. series/anime, and playing video games. These are the things I've done my whole life, but now it's all in one place. I feel like I have the whole world at my disposal right here. It's SO incredibly hard to get up out of this chair and do something productive.

 

[dysfunctional]

Right here with you, guys. I wake up in panic almost every single day. Probably this is a result of my anxious dreams as well. The worst part is waking up not knowing what exactly you were dreaming about..

Yeah, I've been taking Zoloft and Valium since 2007, although about a or two ago my doctor switched me from Zoloft to Lexapro. I'm -supposed- to take 30 mgs of both every day, but over the years I've abused my valium prescription and gradually taken more and more at a time. These days my prescription runs out pretty fast most of the time, and so I have to go most of the month without it. I also have issues with alcoholism. Typically when a tangible thing triggers a lot of depression and misery, I get really really drunk.

This substance abuse problem with alcohol and valium is obviously bad, but that's just one of many things I struggle with. I know there are ways to get better in the long run. At the very least, I know I could start trying to eat healthier, exercising, and losing some weight. But, as I've said in one or more other threads, I have severe self motivation problems. forget exercising; I have a hard time finding the motivation to shower and brush my teeth every day. I feel like I have absolutely no self control whatsoever. I feel like some kind of robot, just a slave to the whims of my body.

I spend all day on the computer, watching movies/t.v. series/anime, and playing video games. These are the things I've done my whole life, but now it's all in one place. I feel like I have the whole world at my disposal right here. It's SO incredibly hard to get up out of this chair and do something productive.

Yeah its nuts. I can relate alot. I was highly productive and active before my severe depression hit. Could've never understood how it could become so hard to do basic things. For me, everything I try to do feels scattered and confusing and wrong, so I basically stopped doing most things. And that makes the depression worse ultimately. Don't have any solitutions yet. Supposedly excercise helps, but even that feels weird to me. I've gotten so out of shape from time in bend and compulsive drinking and eating, that I can barely do 10 pushups. So I just feel week and cuss myself the whole time. I was in really good shape before, and placed alot of my self confidence on that, now the hopelesseness makes me feel I'll never get back to where I was. Part of me knows it could be possible with alot of hard work, but the depression shuts that down. Fuck it sucks. Guess I'm just venting at this point but I relate alot.

 

[Dor]

I had a period where I would wake up from sleep screaming like a madman. But it was medication side effect.

 

[sneakysneaky]

Just the other night, I woke up from a nightmare. I panicked, reached for my phone, and tried to call my friend. She didn't answer, but I calmed down a few seconds later when I realized that I wasn't in my dream anymore. The nightmare: I was in an abandoned warehouse, in a social gathering of some sort. There were old friends, some newer/recent friends, a few family members, and a bunch of strangers. And people were literally leaving the venue one by one, and that came to me figuratively that people were exiting from my life. Like I was being left behind. That I'm going to be all alone soon. Which is ironic because I hate people, but the thought of people leaving me behind in my dream made me panic.

 

[Final Escape]

Oh yes, or wake up in middle of the night freaking out about the next day. I can't wait till this is over.

 

[wiIIow]

This question is mainly directed at people with a lot of anxiety and depression, but anyone can answer. I have no major physical problems. I'm unemployed at the moment, but I'm currently fully supported by my family. But lately I sometimes wake up suddenly feeling an enormous amount of anxiety. It almost feels like a mini panic attack. Sometimes I wake up feeling perfectly normal too (i.e. good), just FYI.

Most of the time when this happens I don't even know why I'm upset. I just wake up and the feelings are there; all I can think about are things like, "why is this happening to me," "somebody help me," "somebody kill me," etc. etc.

Just to clarify I have a few good personal reasons to get anxious, but in these cases when I wake up I'm not even thinking about any particular thing; I just wake up with those overpowering negative emotions. It's even worse when I wake up in the middle of the night, because I don't really have the option of talking to anyone, unless I really felt desperate enough I guess.

I know there's a lot of you that just suffer all the time. But for me, a lot of the time I spend going through my life I genuinely feel good, and while I'm forced to live I need to develop better coping mechanisms, so any advice would be helpful. I've tried meditation many times in the past, and either I'm not very good at it or it just doesn't help. But (here I am, saying it again) someone, please help me.

I used to wake up every single morning in a sweat, clothes and sheets drenched, heart pounding, adrenaline coursing through my body, ridden with absolute terror and no idea why. I would experience pretty much what you described, and it just would. not. stop. I didn't think it would ever go away, and the peak of that period was about when I found SS in the first place. That was back in '16, and things have calmed down a bit since then.

I'm not sure how to help, because I'm not really sure what exactly has calmed things down. I do know that I was living with my dad temporarily at the peak of it, as well as dealing with a lot of unresolved and deeply embedded trauma which only got buried more deeply with the relationship that I had just ended. I do know that being jobless and isolated in my old bedroom all day was not doing wonders for my mental state.

I have been trying to practice mindfulness-type stuff during times when I'm not panicking, just observing things around me, being aware of my senses; the taste and temperature of my coffee, the feeling of cigarette smoke entering and exiting my lungs, the texture and sensation of the keyboard as I press down on the buttons. It might sound silly, and it did to me at first. But once I was able to really get myself into that meditative mindset, and simply observe what's going on around me, it has become a bit easier to do the same with my thoughts and emotions. Observe them rather than be consumed by them. S l o w everything down, feel every sensation, feel your breathing.

It's not that simple of course, and I'm still having many times where I'm NOT able to pull myself out of a crisis. But I've noticed an improvement since I started doing this kind of thing, and forcing myself to keep with it. I'm not sure if any of this makes sense, it's kinda hard to explain... but it is the first time that anything has had an actual, noticeable effect on my anxiety. I would consider my anxiety to be extremely severe, and it has been manifesting itself since I was 6 years old. So, take from that what you will I suppose.

I'm sorry you're going through this, and I understand that sometimes, in the end, there's just nothing you can do but wait it out. It's an awful way to live and you have my sympathy

 

[journeytotheend]

I experience this at least 2-3 times a week. Like last night just after 2 am I woke up in a panic, drenched in sweat, curled up in the fetal position shivering. Takes at least an hour or two before I have a chance of getting back to sleep if I can manage to go back to sleep again at all.

 

[KiraLittleOwl]

Yes, and that the worst feeling I have, it is like I wake up and nightmare is reality, I try to stay in bed as long as I can to avoid another day filled with anxiety, uncertainty and suicidal thoughts. Often I wake up crying because my life problems don't let me go even in my dreams.
I like to go to sleep though, it's like a little death.

 

[Mecha Man]

I used to wake up every single morning in a sweat, clothes and sheets drenched, heart pounding, adrenaline coursing through my body, ridden with absolute terror and no idea why. I would experience pretty much what you described, and it just would. not. stop. I didn't think it would ever go away, and the peak of that period was about when I found SS in the first place. That was back in '16, and things have calmed down a bit since then.

I'm not sure how to help, because I'm not really sure what exactly has calmed things down. I do know that I was living with my dad temporarily at the peak of it, as well as dealing with a lot of unresolved and deeply embedded trauma which only got buried more deeply with the relationship that I had just ended. I do know that being jobless and isolated in my old bedroom all day was not doing wonders for my mental state.

I have been trying to practice mindfulness-type stuff during times when I'm not panicking, just observing things around me, being aware of my senses; the taste and temperature of my coffee, the feeling of cigarette smoke entering and exiting my lungs, the texture and sensation of the keyboard as I press down on the buttons. It might sound silly, and it did to me at first. But once I was able to really get myself into that meditative mindset, and simply observe what's going on around me, it has become a bit easier to do the same with my thoughts and emotions. Observe them rather than be consumed by them. S l o w everything down, feel every sensation, feel your breathing.

It's not that simple of course, and I'm still having many times where I'm NOT able to pull myself out of a crisis. But I've noticed an improvement since I started doing this kind of thing, and forcing myself to keep with it. I'm not sure if any of this makes sense, it's kinda hard to explain... but it is the first time that anything has had an actual, noticeable effect on my anxiety. I would consider my anxiety to be extremely severe, and it has been manifesting itself since I was 6 years old. So, take from that what you will I suppose.

I'm sorry you're going through this, and I understand that sometimes, in the end, there's just nothing you can do but wait it out. It's an awful way to live and you have my sympathy

Sounds like you've got it a lot worse than I do. Your symptoms sound more like my brother's; he's got panic disorder. I don't know how long you've been trying to maintain a meditative state, but it sounds like you've got a lot more self discipline than I do. Everything you say makes sense, although I've never thought of trying to be in that state of mind 'round the clock. As I said before, I have severe motivation problems. I have trouble doing the most basic things, like showering and brushing my teeth every day.

 

[wiIIow]

Sounds like you've got it a lot worse than I do. Your symptoms sound more like my brother's; he's got panic disorder. I don't know how long you've been trying to maintain a meditative state, but it sounds like you've got a lot more self discipline than I do. Everything you say makes sense, although I've never thought of trying to be in that state of mind 'round the clock. As I said before, I have severe motivation problems. I have trouble doing the most basic things, like showering and brushing my teeth every day.

trust me, it's a huge work in progress, and will be for the rest of my life. I can in no way maintain it round the clock, but it does seem to help when I'm able to stick with it for any length of time... which is more than challenging to do

 

[Hank]

This question is mainly directed at people with a lot of anxiety and depression, but anyone can answer. I have no major physical problems. I'm unemployed at the moment, but I'm currently fully supported by my family. But lately I sometimes wake up suddenly feeling an enormous amount of anxiety. It almost feels like a mini panic attack. Sometimes I wake up feeling perfectly normal too (i.e. good), just FYI.

Most of the time when this happens I don't even know why I'm upset. I just wake up and the feelings are there; all I can think about are things like, "why is this happening to me," "somebody help me," "somebody kill me," etc. etc.

Just to clarify I have a few good personal reasons to get anxious, but in these cases when I wake up I'm not even thinking about any particular thing; I just wake up with those overpowering negative emotions. It's even worse when I wake up in the middle of the night, because I don't really have the option of talking to anyone, unless I really felt desperate enough I guess.

I know there's a lot of you that just suffer all the time. But for me, a lot of the time I spend going through my life I genuinely feel good, and while I'm forced to live I need to develop better coping mechanisms, so any advice would be helpful. I've tried meditation many times in the past, and either I'm not very good at it or it just doesn't help. But (here I am, saying it again) someone, please help me.

Hello man, about 2 years ago I had this to. To me it did not happen in the middle of the night, but in the evening before sleep. It was hell. It got worse, and at the worst I even had it during daytime. True hell. Just like you, I was not thinking or worrying about bad stuff. The thing is, You actually are on a certain level feeling anxious about something. But not really on the surface, but below.

I thought I could never get rid of it, but I did. I asked the doctor for meds because I could not take it anymore. But I never took those meds. Instead I tried to find my own solution without any meds. Because I knew meds would only suppress it, and while that is a quick fix, it will hit you harder in the end.

Meditation won't help much, because for something like that severe you need something more physical. I fixed it myself by doing yoga. I never believed that lightheaded crap, but I was really prepared to do anything to get rid of it.

So I did. Every time I had that panic attack, I did yoga in the living room, or wherever I was. Sometimes 6 or 7 times a day. And it helped. I no longer have it. I knew nothing about yoga, and always thought it's for idiots. But it really helps. It's the combination of physical, breathing and the focus that does the trick. It won't solve it in one session. But after each session you will feel slightly better. And it will give the confidence, because you know for yourself you have a method to beat that panic attack.

Back then I found this video "" . Only takes 20 minutes to do it, after some practice. It really saved me. If you take it serious, it will help. Good luck!

 

[15dec]

This happened to me again last night, over something that had happened during the day that's on my mind. I only managed to calm down and get back to sleep by thinking about ctb and what I'll write in my note (if I leave one), which feels weird to admit. The only advice I can really offer is to try really hard to think of something else, or to find sine hobby or activity to do to help you stop focusing on your anxiety.

 

[Pan]

For me,this feeling of primal dread makes me wish I could run away from myself

 

[mesohappy]

This question is mainly directed at people with a lot of anxiety and depression, but anyone can answer. I have no major physical problems. I'm unemployed at the moment, but I'm currently fully supported by my family. But lately I sometimes wake up suddenly feeling an enormous amount of anxiety. It almost feels like a mini panic attack. Sometimes I wake up feeling perfectly normal too (i.e. good), just FYI.

Most of the time when this happens I don't even know why I'm upset. I just wake up and the feelings are there; all I can think about are things like, "why is this happening to me," "somebody help me," "somebody kill me," etc. etc.

Just to clarify I have a few good personal reasons to get anxious, but in these cases when I wake up I'm not even thinking about any particular thing; I just wake up with those overpowering negative emotions. It's even worse when I wake up in the middle of the night, because I don't really have the option of talking to anyone, unless I really felt desperate enough I guess.

I know there's a lot of you that just suffer all the time. But for me, a lot of the time I spend going through my life I genuinely feel good, and while I'm forced to live I need to develop better coping mechanisms, so any advice would be helpful. I've tried meditation many times in the past, and either I'm not very good at it or it just doesn't help. But (here I am, saying it again) someone, please help me.

Ive been having a lot,for awhile,my friend..Mostly around the early morning hours(3-5)..I dont what the hell it is,Ive had it when I was rolling in money and Im having it now as Im dead broke.I just wake up,terrified.Seems to have gotten worse as Ive gotten older.

 

[Tempeste]

Frequently. Sometimes from nightmares
Sometimes from noises outside. Sometimes just bc I fell asleep and let me guard down

 

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

Sometimes. I experienced fast heartbeats yesterday

 

[k75]

This happened to me all night long. Some of it I could trace to PTSD nightmares, but other times were a mystery. Finally I had a sleep study done. It turns out I have severe sleep apnea and was suffocating. My study showed I was waking up to 90 times per hour. I never remembered a lot of them, but they could be violent.

I've apparently had it since I was little, but nobody thought to mention it. My mom says sometimes they'd have to monitor me all night to make sure I didn't stop breathing.

 

[Trisolaris]

Yes. Every morning the anxiety hits me bad. These days I usually wake up at 4:30-5AM, an hour before I actually need to wake up, and lie in bed with horrible anxiety.

 

[ImsooDone1N]

I have this feeling about 5 days a week, where as soon as I wake up and realize I've to get up soon I'm instantly hit with what I can only describe as a tsunami of anxiety and panic. Sometimes my body begins to tremble & shake. When I stand my knees feel like they will buckle. Coursing thru my Mind are 1000's of things, all that bring me anxiety in someway or another. I feel as if I'm being crushed by my own fearful mind. A truly horrible feeling & thing to have to experience and most certainly an awful way to wake up.

 

[Pan]

I have this feeling about 5 days a week, where as soon as I wake up and realize I've to get up soon I'm instantly hit with what I can only describe as a tsunami of anxiety and panic. Sometimes my body begins to tremble & shake. When I stand my knees feel like they will buckle. Coursing thru my Mind are 1000's of things, all that bring me anxiety in someway or another. I feel as if I'm being crushed by my own fearful mind. A truly horrible feeling & thing to have to experience and most certainly an awful way to wake up.

It is rare indeed when I wake up without anxiety about EVERYTHING. Facing the morning is like putting on armor, girding myself for the day to come.Out comes my "normal" mask and i'm on with the day. Xanax, Zoloft and vitamins get me up and going; if it were'nt For Xanax, i'd be the equivalent of burnt toast by the afternoon. I can hardly wait to get home so I can remove normal mask. Truly, a hell of a way to live, huh?

 

[Backwood_tilt]

i have chronic PTSD (CPTSD) and yeah i get nightmares and night terrors as one of my primary symptoms.

Taking benzodiazepines which also help me fall asleep, are helpful, but the ones i have are short-duration and i end up redosing as i wake up throughout the night.

 

[Razor's Edge]

I could never understand why people cut themselves. Is it a manifestation of self-hatred, are you trying to distract yourself from the crippling anxiety? Help me understand.

I do wake up at night sometimes, due to bladder mostly.And in a few seconds, I am engulfed by thoughts of death. I wouldn't call it panic per se, but the thoughts put me in a deep state of misery and I try to think which method is best for CTB but I am unable to proceed with my thoughts because I just feel so damn miserable and cold inside. Helpless and disgusted at the fact that I don't have a convenient means to CTB (shotgun, Nembutal etc.)

I, also, am a cutter. You asked about trying to understand why people cut themselves.
This is my reasoning.
I feel an absolutely insane NEED to cut or punish myself in some way when something or someone hurts me in some bad way, to feel physical pain is Extremely necessary to Distract myself from extreme emotional pain. I haven's cut in quite a few years, however, the thought is there quite there! It's never completely far from my mind, especially when I am in any downward spirals. I do not think this urge or need will ever go away.

I suffer from quite a lot of mental issues you might say.
I suffer from PTSD, Borderline Personality Disorder, Depression, Anxiety, Panic Disorder, Sleep Disorder, etc.

I, also, have awoken many times with this sense of panic, which is most likely due to my dreams and nightmares...A LOT of PTSD!!! For that matter, I have many times, throughout my whole life (for I have been an Extreme Dreamer my entire life), that I have been running from something or someone chasing me, in a nightmare, and I will wake up with the feeling that I lived the whole experience, and will wake up So exhausted, as if I Was Actually there!
I would be so burdened by this, and so exhausted, as if I had not slept at all...restful sleep, I mean, that my whole day would be ruined, and any chance of going back to sleep, or for even wanting to for that matter,

As for the continuous thoughts of CTB, and I mean all the time, (even when I'm smoking weed with friends or, hell, even while watching porn with my fiance'. It has consumed every waking thought. I figure that when it even interferes with these...it might just be THAT time!

I am on this site to talk to other lost souls, like me, about so many mutual feelings that you can't find anywhere else but here. As odd as this sounds, (I have been under psychiatric treatment since 2007), and I honestly feel that this site is more therapeutic than most therapy sessions. I want to communicate with others, who are on the same side of couch as me. That actually understand these feelings and emotions, and not just from something they read in a book. That is NOT nearly the same!

I am also wanting to know which way is the Best way to CTB and Do I have the means to get what I need or the Ability to get it.
Everything is so confusing! My despair, combined with my mental illness, makes it hard to even think straight! This causes great difficulty absorbing all of the information I am reading. But I refuse to give up on using this site for help!

I wish I had all the answers. I wish I could help you in some way.

Good luck on discovering the right answers for you.
If you ever need to talk to someone...I'm here.

 

[Pan]

My docotor is retiring; I don't know if the new, incoming physician will prescribe me. I have been on Xanax for some thirty years...should I consider suing the bastard. As patient with a history odiopathic epilepsy,I feel anxious about driving, etc, any helpful hints?