Discussion Would liking who you are change anything?

[Ardesevent]

No one's happy with who they are, especially not here. I think the only people who are those who do terrible things on a regular basis just because it's fun, or think they're above everyone else.
If you loved yourself, would you still want to die? It doesn't have to be in the paragon way, maybe you'll just think you look good or aren't a mess.
I have no clue on how I would answer this one, honestly.

 

[GrumpyFrog]

It is a tough question, indeed.
I guess if I liked myself, I might've tried some things that could improve my life that I currently don't because "I will fail anyway" and "I am not worthy". But if those would not work, I would probably end up suicidal regardless.

 

[Toptock]

Honestly probably not because of all the mistakes. The objective failure that i am coupled with the knowledge that my broken existence is solely the byproduct of my self-destructive lack-of-processing childhood trauma and peter pan syndrome. If i liked myself I'd still be a bonafide failure. A nobody who has nothing to offer.

 

[fionasparks39]

No one's happy with who they are, especially not here. I think the only people who are those who do terrible things on a regular basis just because it's fun, or think they're above everyone else.
If you loved yourself, would you still want to die? It doesn't have to be in the paragon way, maybe you'll just think you look good or aren't a mess.
I have no clue on how I would answer this one, honestly.

this is an interesting discussion! short answer, yeah.

long answer: i already have some confidence gained recently, like, yeah, i know i have good friends, i have some talents worth something. but, since we are all human and stuff, i can't help but compare myself to others, y'know? be my own worst critic and stuff.

i can, for example, write books, but i will never make money off it. or i can maybe pass the board exam but i can't, for my life, find enough patients to prove my credibility. or yes, i am pretty, but it's such a niche definition of beauty i am still ugly by world standards! i even lowered my own standards so i stop self-criticizing and i'm still disappointed by myself.

it's as if despite loving myself, i will always look for the stuff that lacks, or compare myself to something, and then it's once again a spiral to wanting to die.

 

[sadworld]

I don't think it would change the fact that I don't belong here. Actually, it wouldn't change anything.

 

[Ren Elsie Jewelria]

It would change something, but not enough. I used to like myself much more than now, actually, but I was still depressed/suicidal. Now it's just getting worse every year.

 

[Marktheghost]

I like who I am.
It's nobody else liking me, or even making the effort to get to know me, that's the problem.

 

[Lupgevif]

No. I don't want to kill myself because of who I am.

 

[antigone_iris]

this is an interesting discussion! short answer, yeah.

long answer: i already have some confidence gained recently, like, yeah, i know i have good friends, i have some talents worth something. but, since we are all human and stuff, i can't help but compare myself to others, y'know? be my own worst critic and stuff.

i can, for example, write books, but i will never make money off it. or i can maybe pass the board exam but i can't, for my life, find enough patients to prove my credibility. or yes, i am pretty, but it's such a niche definition of beauty i am still ugly by world standards! i even lowered my own standards so i stop self-criticizing and i'm still disappointed by myself.

it's as if despite loving myself, i will always look for the stuff that lacks, or compare myself to something, and then it's once again a spiral to wanting to die.

Same! I can totally relate.

 

[Superdeterminist]

I don't really love or hate myself. Just like reality, there are some aspects of myself which I like, and others which I dislike and would do away with if I could. The problem is the mismatch between myself and reality. I actually think that it's neither me nor reality that are solely to blame, but the interaction between the two. It's this interaction that I seek to end.

 

[MrBlue]

I don't think liking myself would change how other people treat me. I've liked myself before and I was still very isolated, which is my main reason to ctb. If anything when I've shown confidence in who I am I was more prone to being antagonised, probably because I'll always be considered an easy/acceptable target, and confidence just make the target more obvious than when I try to blend in and go unnoticed.

 

[Lilacmoon]

No. When I like myself I become even more toxic. I don't want to delude myself into thinking that there's anything good about me. Rather be realistic than ignorant to the truth of how I am.

 

[woxihuanni]

Loving myself does not make me produce a dick to fuck myself with, or give me permanent residence, or give me a house or anything. The concept of self-love is a weapon used to gaslight people into thinking they deserve bad treatment if they don't prove they have it. And it is not possible to prove it.

 

[opiatedreamz]

i don't really hate myself per se. but i'm not so in love with myself i could do no wrong. i could always improve as a person, maybe some things are unchangeable, but i don't know. i don't really try much. change comes to me as natural as the earth turns it seems. i don't feel the same person even a year from the last.

 

[Womps]

I am one with myself. I am where i am and i am what i am. Learning to love yourself as you are is all you can do.

 

[Lupgevif]

Loving myself does not make me produce a dick to fuck myself with, or give me permanent residence, or give me a house or anything. The concept of self-love is a weapon used to gaslight people into thinking they deserve bad treatment if they don't prove they have it. And it is not possible to prove it.

Thank you so much for having said this.

 

[suicidal-raven]

I would like to think that liking myself would help. I don't know though. There's so much hatred inside of me that I don't know if liking myself would even do anything.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Maybe it would, but I don't think it should. I'd go from being an ugly, stupid asshole to being a cocky, ugly, stupid asshole.

 

[KleinerWolf]

the whole idea with who I am truly confuses me sometimes.
It depends on the perspective how others perceive me and how I perceive myself,
internally, also externally.

I basically disassociate my external self, but I do appreciate and praise my internal self, if that makes sense.

To answer your question, if things reach my final limit,
I prefer to be dead, stay true to myself,
than live and act/behave like someone I'm not.

at least talking about the internal side of things...

 

[Moegetaku]

I can write yada yada blah blah but let's cut down to answer - No
I was and prolly am suicidal even now because the girl I loved cheated on me for almost one year. Again to cut long story short, I just changed myself and get laid more often than not. It still hurts me because she is in relationship with someone else and I am unable to form any kind of relationship because I try to find the good side of her in every girl. If I'd kept on loving myself for who I am, I'd prolly be dead by now.

 

[Xocoyotziin]

the whole idea with who I am truly confuses me sometimes.
It depends on the perspective how others perceive me and how I perceive myself,
internally, also externally.

I basically disassociate my external self, but I do appreciate and praise my internal self, if that makes sense.

To answer your question, if things reach my final limit,
I prefer to be dead, stay true to myself,
than live and act/behave like someone I'm not.

at least talking about the internal side of things...

I think I might feel similarly-ish
I sort of like/am very familiar with my inner self but my outer self is basically a mystery to me, and what I do know or think I know about it I don't like. I've been told by some people that I'm not very self-aware and when I first heard that it made no sense to me because I'm super aware of the internal self but then I realized what they meant and it clicked.
I'd love to be disembodied and not have to worry about having an outer self at all

 

[greebo6]

I'd like to know what liking myself would actually feel like because I don't think I ever have. So yeah ,I'm curious about that.
Would it change anything....Who knows.

 

[_Kaira_]

Wish I knew how that felt. If I did, who knows? I might want to live. If I didn't think of myself so negatively and believe I'm so useless, then just maybe. Of course, hating myself is only one thing on the list of my many problems.

 

[Apep]

I would make me less likely to CTB but it would not remove my desire to kill myself entirely