would anyone be willing to read the Bible with me?

[wildflowers1996]

I know this sounds like a strange request but basically I want to read it before ctb - just in case /somehow/ I get an epiphany or actually feel God's love or something like that?

I don't think I even believe in God. But there's just a part of me that's like "what if". And people seem to say if you pray / read the Bible you might feel God's presence and idk I'm just desperate at this point and also I'm scared of going to hell and I want to show God I at least tried to connect with Him before ctb if that makes any sense

I want to read the Quran too (because if there is a God it's not necessarily Christianity which is the "right faith") but I don't know how I can do that with having such bad ocd and with reading the Quran requiring so many rituals

The problem is even with the Bible it's REALLY hard for me to read with ocd. I also have such terrible concentration atm
I'm just wondering if there's anyone in a similar boat to me who would like to read it with me? Like even if it's just going onto watch2gether and listening to an audio version with text at the same time
I feel if I had someone to read with me I might be more likely to be able to do it

 

[hibikikyuxx]

The bible is a waste of time. It was written by humans. Humanity is far more advanced and smarter now than they were all those thousands of years ago. There is no such thing as heaven and hell, nor a God. I was raised by catholic parents. I went to (more like was forced to) go to church every week as a kid. Christianity was shoved down by throat. I prayed to God every night as a kid. I NEVER felt God's presence, so all of that was useless and just them brainwashing me. Also, the bible condemns homosexuality. It is also written in the bible that the mother of Jesus was 12-14 when she gave birth to him, while the father was an old man, which is pedophilia.

I really hate religion and the bible has the most ridiculous bullshit written in it. It's a bunch of fairy tale stories and full of hypocrites. If we go by the bible, then God is a homophobic piece of shit who allows abuse, rape, and murder to happen because of "free will", yet he condemns same sex relationships.

FUCK. GOD.

 

[wildflowers1996]

The bible is a waste of time. It was written by humans. There is no such thing as heaven and hell. I was raised by catholic parents. I went/was forced to go to church every week as a kid. Christianity was shoved down by throat. I prayed to God every night as a kid. I NEVER felt God's presence. Also, the bible condemns homosexuality. It is also written in the bible that the mother of Jesus was 12-14 when she gave birth to him, while the father was an old man, which is pedophilia.

I really hate religion and the bible has the most ridiculous bullshit written in it. It's a bunch of fairy tale stories and full of hypocrites. If we go by the bible, then God is a homophobic piece of shit who allows abuse, rape, and murder to happen because of "free will", yet he only accepts same sex relationships.

FUCK. GOD.

I know what you mean I can't see how a loving God could allow suffering
It actually makes me scared though that God does exist, but I should be scared of Him
I guess I'm trying to avoid hell and I don't think I believe in it but I'm always just thinking what if I'm wrong
I know some Christians don't condemn homosexuality I've also been looking at Christian Universalism which says everyone's pain ends eventually and everyone goes to heaven eventually which I KNOW is probably wishful thinking but I have no other hope to cling onto

 

[hibikikyuxx]

I know what you mean I can't see how a loving God could allow suffering
It actually makes me scared though that God does exist, but I should be scared of Him
I guess I'm trying to avoid hell and I don't think I believe in it but I'm always just thinking what if I'm wrong

Epicurus:

"Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent.

Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent.

Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil?

Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?"

David Hume:

"If God is omnipotent, omniscient and wholly good, whence evil? If God wills to prevent evil but cannot, then He is not omnipotent. If He can prevent evil but does not, then he is not good. In either case he is not God."

I agree with both of these quotes of these wise men. A God who allows bad things to happen is not a God in my eyes. If God exists, where is he? If he does exist, why would he allow things like abuse, rape, and murder to happen? Is he able to prevent bad things from happening? No? Then he's not God.

I've also been looking at Christian Universalism which says everyone's pain ends eventually and everyone goes to heaven eventually which I KNOW is probably wishful thinking but I have no other hope to cling onto

I don't like that one bit. "Everyone" goes to heaven? Abusers, Rapists, and Murderers go to heaven? Then I would rather choose hell or nothingness instead.

 

[Proxycake]

I know this sounds like a strange request but basically I want to read it before ctb - just in case /somehow/ I get an epiphany or actually feel God's love or something like that?

I don't think I even believe in God. But there's just a part of me that's like "what if". And people seem to say if you pray / read the Bible you might feel God's presence and idk I'm just desperate at this point and also I'm scared of going to hell and I want to show God I at least tried to connect with Him before ctb if that makes any sense

I want to read the Quran too (because if there is a God it's not necessarily Christianity which is the "right faith") but I don't know how I can do that with having such bad ocd and with reading the Quran requiring so many rituals

The problem is even with the Bible it's REALLY hard for me to read with ocd. I also have such terrible concentration atm
I'm just wondering if there's anyone in a similar boat to me who would like to read it with me? Like even if it's just going onto watch2gether and listening to an audio version with text at the same time
I feel if I had someone to read with me I might be more likely to be able to do it

Sometimes I use religion to make myself feel better, but I haven't read the bible in years. I'm not opposed to it if you'd like to listen to an audio version of it together, or we could read it to each-other (even though the English is very old) :-)

 

[DyingToDie123]

I'm planning to ctb tomorrow but just want to empathize with this, I've done 12 steps (Depressed Anonymous in particular) for the same reasons, hoping something spiritual could save me. It never did, but maybe it would for you.

 

[amb.boardman]

I will read it with you, but only if we read the funny bits and I get to do funny voices

 

[hermestrimegistus]

Would never tell someone not to read the bible, especially considering how a majority of people swear by it (when they haven't even read it themselves) but I would suggest maybe reading it and considering that God is malevolent. Whether you consider Him real or fictitious. "He" is not the one to worship. For example consider Genesis. The serpent is the one that is truly holy. Why would a deity that is supposedly good want you to live in the dark and punish you for wanting to be aware/conscious? I think if you consider them parables, you can learn a lot from the bible. Just not from literal interpretations. Or using them to fear damnation

 

[Myforevercharlie]

The bible is a waste of time. It was written by humans. Humanity is far more advanced and smarter now than they were all those thousands of years ago. There is no such thing as heaven and hell, nor a God. I was raised by catholic parents. I went to (more like was forced to) go to church every week as a kid. Christianity was shoved down by throat. I prayed to God every night as a kid. I NEVER felt God's presence, so all of that was useless and just them brainwashing me. Also, the bible condemns homosexuality. It is also written in the bible that the mother of Jesus was 12-14 when she gave birth to him, while the father was an old man, which is pedophilia.

I really hate religion and the bible has the most ridiculous bullshit written in it. It's a bunch of fairy tale stories and full of hypocrites. If we go by the bible, then God is a homophobic piece of shit who allows abuse, rape, and murder to happen because of "free will", yet he condemns same sex relationships.

FUCK. GOD.

Do you really think a reply like this helps? It's fine that you think it's a load of bs, OP just asked if there's anyone who wants to read with them.
If they can find an answer or a little piece of mind that's great.

 

[wildflowers1996]

Epicurus:

"Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent.

Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent.

Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil?

Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?"

David Hume:

"If God is omnipotent, omniscient and wholly good, whence evil? If God wills to prevent evil but cannot, then He is not omnipotent. If He can prevent evil but does not, then he is not good. In either case he is not God."

I agree with both of these quotes of these wise men. A God who allows bad things to happen is not a God in my eyes. If God exists, where is he? If he does exist, why would he allow things like abuse, rape, and murder to happen? Is he able to prevent bad things from happening? No? Then he's not God.


I don't like that one bit. "Everyone" goes to heaven? Abusers, Rapists, and Murderers go to heaven? Then I would rather choose hell or nothingness instead.

I agree with you - I've looked at so many possible "justifications" for suffering but can't find anything that I feel justifies it.
But I'm just so scared if I don't try to "seek God" that I'll go to hell, I know it sounds ridiculous but it's just so terrifying

I think the idea is that these people would all be changed and no longer evil but I can see why people might object to it

Sometimes I use religion to make myself feel better, but I haven't read the bible in years. I'm not opposed to it if you'd like to listen to an audio version of it together, or we could read it to each-other (even though the English is very old) :-)

That would be good; thank you. :) I'll pm you

 

[hibikikyuxx]

Do you really think a reply like this helps? It's fine that you think it's a load of bs, OP just asked if there's anyone who wants to read with them.
If they can find an answer or a little piece of mind that's great.

The bible was written by humans.

The bible supports homophobia, incest, and pedophilia. If we go by the bible, then God hates gay people, Joseph was a pedophile, and Adam and Eva, the first humans, performed incest to bring more people into the world.

So yes, I do think that my reply helps. I don't "think" that it is a load of bs, it IS a load of bs. The univeese as we know it, came to existence with the big bang.

But you're right, it is ultimately the decision of the OP of this thread, so I have no say in this. If they want to read the bible together with someone, then they can go on ahead. I was just making sure that they know what they're getting into.

I agree with you - I've looked at so many possible "justifications" for suffering but can't find anything that I feel justifies it.
But I'm just so scared if I don't try to "seek God" that I'll go to hell, I know it sounds ridiculous but it's just so terrifying

I understand your fear but at the same time, think about this rationally.

Why would you go to hell? You did nothing wrong. And now let's look at reality. Have you ever seen anything supernatural? No? Then why would something like "hell" exist? That's why, like I said, the bible and religion in general, are just there to control people. It's religious people controlling other people with fear and forcing them follow their rules.

Basically: "If you do this and that, you will end up in a bad place, but if you do what I like, then you will end up in a good place where you worship God."

It's like parents telling their kids that Santa came to bring them presents. It's all lies.

The bible was written thousands of years ago. The humans back then, all those thousands of years ago, were much dumber and less advanced than we are now. Why would they know about God and how earth was created. but not us? Just take a look at evolution and who the ancestors of us humans are. That disproves the "Adam and Eva were the first humans" bs that the bible is claiming.

I think the idea is that these people would all be changed and no longer evil but I can see why people might object to it

Well yeah because it basically means that they got away with their crimes. Like, I might not believe in heaven and hell, but if those places do exist then I'd rather pick hell for abusers, rapists, and murderers, than heaven.

 

[R_N]

Ngl I am disappointed by these replies. And I say that as an atheist.

If you don't have nice things to say to someones last request why even bother shitting on it? Rude af imo.

Sorry you experienced this op. It is usually not the case here which is why I am surprised.

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

If you really want to waste your time, have at it:


But I can tell you that God is not real. The devil rules this planet. If hell exists, believe me, it won't be any worse than our time here on earth.

 

[hibikikyuxx]

Ngl I am disappointed by these replies. And I say that as an atheist.

If you don't have nice things to say to someones last request why even bother shitting on it? Rude af imo.

Sorry you experienced this op. It is usually not the case here which is why I am surprised.

Look.

I didn't mean to be rude.

It's just that I was catholic myself, yet never felt God's presence, no matter how many times I prayed as a kid. It's all just brainwashing. And the older I got, the more I realized how fucked up the stuff in the bible was.

Adam and Eva performed incest, Joseph was a 90 year old pedophile who raped a 14 year old Mary to bring Jesus into the world, and God hates gay people, even though there is nothing wrong with a man liking a man and a woman liking a woman.

The bible sends a BAD message, alright? It's the reason why so many people get abused or are subjected to Discrimination.

If it wasn't for the bible and religion in general, then many people wouldn't have been abused, gay people wouldn't face Discrimination, and many children wouldn't be raped (there are SOOOOO many child sexual abuse cases occuring in churches).

 

[MiMif]

I mean if someone hasn't agreed to it yet I'm willing to read the Bible with you. I also want to finish it before I ctb....I'm a pseudo Christian but I fully believe God exists and that He's Jesus.

If your still interested you can dm me or reply.....

 

[FadingShadows]

I'm not a good candidate for doing anything WITH anyone because social interaction is one of my biggest stressors (so I don't do chats, calls, etc to begin with, and I live with a narcissistic family member who refuses to acknowledge my need for space because that would mean SHE wasn't getting what she wants, so I don't have anything left for anyone else even if I was more inclined to it), and I have a neurological disorder that sometimes interferes with how well I'm able to speak or read aloud, but if you have any short passages in mind that you want to hear (or even a specific prayer or the like), I'd be willing to try making a sound clip for you, if you think that could be helpful or comforting. I can't promise anything because it comes down to "Can I get the alone time necessary to do it?" (my housemate would probably LOVE to find me reading the Bible so that's not the problem; I just never know when she's going to demand my attention) and "How well can I words today?", but I can at least try.

I've veered off the "straight" path of Christianity, so this probably isn't useful for anyone who's still walking it (or similar religions), but in the primary faith I follow now, there's a line of thought that acknowledges that our gods are more powerful than us, but aren't actually omnipotent. Evil came into the world by accident and it causes suffering because it itself is suffering. It isn't something that can be unmade, only fought against, but when people commit evil acts, it gains an even stronger hold. So you look at the world the way it is now, and the evils we perpetuate... There you go. Our gods don't WANT there to be suffering, but there's only so much They can do, especially when there are people actively fighting FOR evil and suffering.

 

[Cloud Busting]

The bible is a waste of time. It was written by humans. Humanity is far more advanced and smarter now than they were all those thousands of years ago. There is no such thing as heaven and hell, nor a God. I was raised by catholic parents. I went to (more like was forced to) go to church every week as a kid. Christianity was shoved down by throat. I prayed to God every night as a kid. I NEVER felt God's presence, so all of that was useless and just them brainwashing me. Also, the bible condemns homosexuality. It is also written in the bible that the mother of Jesus was 12-14 when she gave birth to him, while the father was an old man, which is pedophilia.

I really hate religion and the bible has the most ridiculous bullshit written in it. It's a bunch of fairy tale stories and full of hypocrites. If we go by the bible, then God is a homophobic piece of shit who allows abuse, rape, and murder to happen because of "free will", yet he condemns same sex relationships.

FUCK. GOD.

Dude

The op has ocd and the Bible triggers her obsessions/fears. She's trying to get to the root of her irrational worries by making peace with the Bible.

You should commend her for trying to overcome her obsessions, rather than talk about how worthless religion is.

This isn't about religion. It's about overcoming anxiety.

 

[hibikikyuxx]

Dude

The op has ocd and the Bible triggers her obsessions/fears. She's trying to get to the root of her irrational worries by making peace with the Bible.

You should commend her for trying to overcome her obsessions, rather than talk about how worthless religion is.

This isn't about religion. It's about overcoming anxiety.

Doesn't the bible consider suicide as a sin? What's the point in reading the bible when it would only worsen her fears? Not to mention that again, the bible was written by humans and sends bad messages. Not only is the bible a waste of time, but I feel like it would only make her OCD worse. But again, it is her decision. I just hope she doesn't get the wrong idea after reading the bible (that suicide and homosexuality are bad, but that incest and pedophilia are fine).

 

[tiger b]

Op, it's not a strange request. I've know staunch atheists ask for something similar.

PM me if you think I can help somehow.

'I just hope she doesn't get the wrong idea after reading the bible (that suicide and homosexuality are bad, but that incest and pedophilia are fine).'

I'm not thinking there's a likelihood that the op is about to go on an incestual paedophilic spree before she CTB, do you? Also, I'm not sure that they want to read all the Bible.

 

[hibikikyuxx]

I'm not thinking there's a likelihood that the op is about to go on an incestual paedophilic spree before she CTB, do you? Also, I'm not sure that they want to read all the Bible.

OP is scared that she will go to hell. The bible states that suicide is a sin, meaning that if we go by the bible, people who commit suicide go to hell. That's why, even besides the incest and pedophilia bullshit that's written and supported in the bible, I wouldn't recommend the OP to read the bible. It would only make her fears worse. And again, the bible was written by humans, like you and me, so the bible stating "do this and you will go to hell" is no different than a religious person in real life gaslighting and guilt-tripping you with the same lies of how you will go to hell if you do this and that. Religion was created by people to control other people and I don't think it would help the OP of this thread to read a book that's discriminating people like her.

 

[tiger b]

OP is scared that she will go to hell. The bible states that suicide is a sin, meaning that if we go by the bible, people who commit suicide go to hell. That's why, even besides the incest and pedophilia bullshit that's written in the bible, I wouldn't recommend the OP to read the bible. It would only make her fears worse. And again, the bible was written by humans, like you and me, so the bible stating "do this and you will go to hell" is no different than a religious person in real life gaslighting and guilt-tripping you with the same lies of how you will go to hell if you do this and that. Religion was created to control people and I don't think it would help the OP of this thread to read a book that's discriminating people like her.

You've already put your point across, numerous times.

I read your posts. I agree with some of the points but that's irrelevant in this context.

The Bible is a big book. The Bible states many things.

Very few people believe and live by every word in the Bible.

You have your opinions on religion. I grew up in Northern Ireland, don't lecture me on discrimination and control. Or the failures of the book. You're sounding as aggressive as some of the so-called Christians - some - I knew.

What always struck me is the need for some to insist what others must think, and insisting they are right. And what that led to.

Thread is about op, not a critique of the Bible.

You, and I, are not the op.

 

[hibikikyuxx]

You've already put your point across, numerous times

You quoted my comment. All I did was answer to it.

I agree with some of the points but that's irrelevant in this context

Irrelevant how?

The bible is a big book. The Bible states many things

And? I don't understand what you're trying to tell me by saying that.

Very few people believe and live by every word in the Bible

It's not about whether they believe every word in it or not. You and me know that the OP is scared of going to hell. She said so herself.

You have your opinions on religion

Well yeah? After all, it causes wars, abuse, etc, and that's without me even into how it supports incest and pedophilia but subjects suicidal and homosexual people to discrimination.

I grew up in Northern Ireland, don't lecture me on discrimination and control

I'm not lecturing you and I don't know how you being from that place has to do with anything here.

Or the failures of the book

What failures?

You're sounding as aggressive as some of the so-called Christians & some - I knew

Huh? Aggressive? You sound very passive aggressive yourself.

What always struck me is the need for some to insist what others must think, and insisting they are right. And what that led to

Except that Christians are homophobic, support incest (Adam and Eve) and pedophilia (Joseph and Mary), and hate suicidal people, while I support same sex relationships and suicidal people, and don't view incest as okay. Both of my parents are catholic and both of them are abusive, homophobic, and racist, because their catholic upbringing brainwashed them into having those views.

Thread is about op, not a critique of the Bible.

You, and I, are not the op.

OP is afraid of going to hell. How is her reading a book that says that she will go to hell if she commits suicide, going to ease her mind? That's only going to make her fears worse.

 

[tiger b]

You actually sidestepped my comment by redirection and didn't answer it directly but hey ho.

And you repeat what you said yet again.

I think you just want an argument - from someone - and your reaction seems akin to that of some fundamentalist Christians to me. You are lecturing and preaching. You are welcome to believe what you want to.

Atheists are just as capable as being homophobic, racist and abusive as Christians. I'm glad you are different.

Blaming religion for the world's problems is a simplistic cop-out.

No passive aggression in me at all. Project away. I'm not insulting anyone. And I wish you well.

 

[amb.boardman]

OP js not going to hell! The book contradicts itself so many times, about what hell even is. God made us sick if hes real, he isnt gonna punish us for that.

 

[hibikikyuxx]

You actually sidestepped my comment by redirection and didn't answer it directly

I gave an answer to every point of yours.

And you repeat what you said yet again

And you disregard it yet again.

I think you just want an argument

I don't. You're the one who started our discussion, I never asked for this.

your reaction seems akin to that of some fundamentalist Christians to me

Is pointing fingers at others the only you dicuss with someone?

You are lecturing and preaching

No I'm not.

Atheists are just as capable as being homophobic, racist and abusive as Christians

I never said otherwise.

I'm glad you are different

Thank you.

Blaming religion for the world's problems is a simplistic cop-out

I'm not blaming religion for the world's problem, but it is a fact that religion has caused a lot of pain on earth. From the many wars because of religion, to the abuse many children have to go through at home due to their religious parents, to the many child sexual abuse cases in churches.

No passive aggression in me at all. Project away. I'm not insulting anyone.

You keep accusing me of doing things so I was wondering. I'm sorry if I'm wrong.

And I wish you well.

Thank you, I wish the same to you. I apologize if I came off as rude. I won't comment on this thread anymore.

 

[SpencerSees]

I'm in a similar boat. I'm a believer I guess, but it's been years since I read the Bible. Maybe it'd be easier with an accountability buddy of sorts lol

 

[tiger b]

I gave an answer to every point of yours.

And you disregard it yet again.

I don't. You're the one who started our discussion, I never asked for this.

Is pointing fingers at others the only you dicuss with someone?

No I'm not.

I never said otherwise.

Thank you.

I'm not blaming religion for the world's problem, but it is a fact that religion has caused a lot of pain on earth. From the many wars because of religion, to the abuse many children have to go through at home due to their religious parents, to the many child sexual abuse cases in churches.

You keep accusing me of doing things so I was wondering. I'm sorry if I'm wrong.

Thank you, I wish the same to you. I apologize if I came off as rude. I won't comment on this thread anymore.

As I said, there are many things I agree with you on regarding organised religion, I just don't want to go into detail as I feel whatever the op wishes is paramount and I'm sorry if I distracted from that. I apologise if I didn't find the right way to engage with you. I also certainly recognise you believe strongly in what you do and support your right to do so and can see how you were trying to support the op by cautioning her on the toxicity in the Bible that many would agree is plain to see. I'm not sure it's the right context for the way you did it, and that was my concern - although I'm certainly not any authority on that - but there you go.

I am pleased that the thunderbolt from the Lord missed the mark when you effed him, yes I am being facetious here!

Am I babbling? Probably. Enough from me.

 

[Cloud Busting]

Doesn't the bible consider suicide as a sin? What's the point in reading the bible when it would only worsen her fears? Not to mention that again, the bible was written by humans and sends bad messages. Not only is the bible a waste of time, but I feel like it would only make her OCD worse. But again, it is her decision. I just hope she doesn't get the wrong idea after reading the bible (that suicide and homosexuality are bad, but that incest and pedophilia are fine).

You realize that a large part of treating ocd is exposure to your fears right? Avoiding what you're afraid of makes ocd worse

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

OP is scared that she will go to hell. The bible states that suicide is a sin, meaning that if we go by the bible, people who commit suicide go to hell. That's why, even besides the incest and pedophilia bullshit that's written and supported in the bible, I wouldn't recommend the OP to read the bible. It would only make her fears worse. And again, the bible was written by humans, like you and me, so the bible stating "do this and you will go to hell" is no different than a religious person in real life gaslighting and guilt-tripping you with the same lies of how you will go to hell if you do this and that. Religion was created by people to control other people and I don't think it would help the OP of this thread to read a book that's discriminating people like her.

OP is scared that she will go to hell. The bible states that suicide is a sin, meaning that if we go by the bible, people who commit suicide go to hell. That's why, even besides the incest and pedophilia bullshit that's written and supported in the bible, I wouldn't recommend the OP to read the bible. It would only make her fears worse. And again, the bible was written by humans, like you and me, so the bible stating "do this and you will go to hell" is no different than a religious person in real life gaslighting and guilt-tripping you with the same lies of how you will go to hell if you do this and that. Religion was created by people to control other people and I don't think it would help the OP of this thread to read a book that's discriminating people like her.

It's never mentioned in the bible that suicide is a sin. Suicide as a sin wasn't introduced into Christianity until 6AD, AFTER the bible was written. The Christians regard suicide as a sin because it is self - murder. It's all man - made bullshit.

I know what you mean I can't see how a loving God could allow suffering
It actually makes me scared though that God does exist, but I should be scared of Him
I guess I'm trying to avoid hell and I don't think I believe in it but I'm always just thinking what if I'm wrong
I know some Christians don't condemn homosexuality I've also been looking at Christian Universalism which says everyone's pain ends eventually and everyone goes to heaven eventually which I KNOW is probably wishful thinking but I have no other hope to cling onto

I personally don't believe in God, but if reading the bible brings you comfort then I honestly don't see the problem with reading it, and think it wrong that anyone would judge you for doing so.

 

[TraumaEscapee:)]

I know this sounds like a strange request but basically I want to read it before ctb - just in case /somehow/ I get an epiphany or actually feel God's love or something like that?

I don't think I even believe in God. But there's just a part of me that's like "what if". And people seem to say if you pray / read the Bible you might feel God's presence and idk I'm just desperate at this point and also I'm scared of going to hell and I want to show God I at least tried to connect with Him before ctb if that makes any sense

I want to read the Quran too (because if there is a God it's not necessarily Christianity which is the "right faith") but I don't know how I can do that with having such bad ocd and with reading the Quran requiring so many rituals

The problem is even with the Bible it's REALLY hard for me to read with ocd. I also have such terrible concentration atm
I'm just wondering if there's anyone in a similar boat to me who would like to read it with me? Like even if it's just going onto watch2gether and listening to an audio version with text at the same time
I feel if I had someone to read with me I might be more likely to be able to do it

Hi!

Firstly, how are you today? I see you weren't feeling to great the other day. How are you feeling today? If you need a chat my inbox is open. I am more than happy to read the bible with you. I don't have a Quran but I'd be happy to read a verse with you if it made you feel any better. I only want to do it with the intention of making you feel better. I don't want to do it if it will encourage you to ctb. I'm not about encouraging others even though I totally understand how people feel as I suffer myself. Please just reach out. I've been sober from harming myself for a week now. So just reach out x