wishing this didnt take so much planning

[gothfairy]

i want to die, i want to stop living, but i wish it wasn't so hard to ctb. it seems like every method is so difficult and takes so much planning and i'm so exhausted from this life i just wish there was a way to leave NOW.

 

[Fragile]

yea, it is exhausting.

having to write notes, making sure everything goes according to plan, obsessing over little details and about what's going to happen afer i'm gone.
oh well, at least all that suffering will also be gone.

 

[SuicidalSymphonies]

It's a small price to pay leading up to your final decision.

It might seem out of the way and an annoyance, but leaving behind why you did it and all of that stuff helps people move on and understand (hopefully). Unanswered questions would drive me insane, personally but.. That's why I'm writing a note. I don't mind taking the medication before the poison. I am glad to make amends and all of that.

However, I completely understand your frustrations. I have them as well. It feels like too much and it's stressful.

I think you will be just fine in the end, and the decision(s) you make will be the right ones. Have faith in yourself. You've got this and you know you better than anyone else. x

 

[mediocre]

I hear you. Before I go to sleep I always pray to please let me die in my sleep. Even though I don't really believe in a higher power. I have SN and I could easily cbt right now, but I am still afraid.

 

[LMLN]

I too pray every night God takes me home. And I too am too afraid to use my SN. But having it gets me through the day. Because when I'm really struggling I know it's there. Even if I'm afraid to go through with it.

I hear you. Before I go to sleep I always pray to please let me die in my sleep. Even though I don't really believe in a higher power. I have SN and I could easily cbt right now, but I am still afraid.

 

[gothfairy]

I hear you. Before I go to sleep I always pray to please let me die in my sleep. Even though I don't really believe in a higher power. I have SN and I could easily cbt right now, but I am still afraid.

i totallypray for that too. i wish i had SN its just the struggle of acquiring it along with meto and antacids and all that its just so much