Wishes

[Braindead Atheist]

I wish:
I had a brain that could give me what I need
I didn't have pcos
I was skinny
I was taller
I had money
My efforts would actually pay off
I never went to Holy Spirit Elementary
Or Oak Park-carpenter/I never met Sister Petra, Mrs. Watson or Ms. Gill
I was an only child
I didn't have a good for nothing art talent

But since I don't have ANYTHING on this list, I want to either be someone else with a different life/set of circumstances or just dead.

Ik I'm here to make others happy, but I can't do that if I'm not happy. And why aren't i happy?! NONE of my efforts EVER pay off and I'm literally the only one, I'm also stuck watching other people's dreams come true, I get bullied and fired at every job, I have no money to enjoy life with and my STUPID pcos body won't shed a single pound no matter what I do and if I enjoy food like AT ALL I gain weight.

I'm so SICK of this life. I HOPE my next CTB attempt is successful. I've attempted 4 times already, 5 if you count when I got scammed. This life is BEYOND redemption or help. There is just NOTHING here for me. And people want to shit me about "intelligent design" if that were real I'd have what I need to provide for myself in this crappy world.

My body would do its fucking job and I would have interests in things that are actually needed like construction, medical, financial, HR, Law, Education. Etc but no. I'm a "creative" which is just useless. I hope somehow by heaven's grace I DIE in my sleep tonight.

 

[MrDarkness]

I'm sorry to hear life has been extremely unbearable for you. Also sorry you got scammed. I hope you find peace in life or death

 

[Braindead Atheist]

I'm sorry to hear life has been extremely unbearable for you. Also sorry you got scammed. I hope you find peace in life or death

Death. Life is just impossible to work with.

 

[MrDarkness]

Death. Life is just impossible to work with.

Same, I'm using ctb as a last resort when life is fucked for me, I'm just trying to enjoy and hope life gets better, but I ain't got my hopes up

 

[WorthlessTrash]

I wish:
I was an attractive/average looking cis female.

 

[FuneralCry]

This world certainly is such a dreadful and hellish place, it's so horrible how people suffer all through no fault of their own and I get that it's so tiring feeling trapped here. But anyway I hope that you eventually find freedom from all the suffering as it's really understandable so desperately wishing to leave, I hate how suicide isn't as straightforward as just deciding to never wake.