loterius

loterius

Member
Sep 21, 2023
43
Do u have certain wishes or a list of things you wanted to finish or doing before you make you decision to leave the earth?.
Like a vacation, some games you wanted to play first before you go.
I for instance have a long steam game library in which i wanted to finish first as most as possible as i have paid for the games and i like the challenge of finish the games, even if it means i have to pauze everly like 30 minutes break of 10 minutes to rest because gaming is that intensive for my body.
 
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cscott

cscott

Awaiting for life’s end ☠️
Jun 22, 2023
250
Nothing at all .. I want nothing more, nothing can bring joy when ur dead inside.
 
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Death is my goal

Death is my goal

pathetic failure
Aug 25, 2022
473
no
 
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bpdbunnygirl

bpdbunnygirl

Member
Sep 19, 2023
40
I just want to outlive my pets. I feel like no one else could take care of them as good as I do especially since they're commonly misunderstood animals. I can't imagine leaving the world just for someone to take them and just shove them in a cage...
 
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loterius

loterius

Member
Sep 21, 2023
43
Nothing at all .. I want nothing more, nothing can bring joy when ur dead inside.
Looks like you pretty done here above ground, just like me. Its my euthanasia was rejected a few years back otherwise i wasnt even be here no more. It has makes things more complicated for me that rejection. But i have besides to finish a couple of video games too not much wishes after that and looking some explicit material i have on my pc then i want to make it definitive too. i get always that feeling to when you heard other people close to death want to do some quick joyful activity shortly before dying. drinking, sex that kind of stuff. That would be the only hard pill to swallow for me not be able to do that stuff no more when ur death. But i somehow can cope with that scenario already to as my body is fcked down enough due to self harm and my typical psychical man characteristics have plummet alot over the years so much sex wasnt on the cards anyway hahahh or a relationship. Stuff on the internet(explciit) either watching can still be an addictive slight of a joyful experience its all in 4k now what you see online. But all other then that i have nothing to live for too. I will go so far as that kind of sexual internet stuff addiction is holding me a bit back to not have already pull the trigger.
 
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retardkid

retardkid

StupidF*ckingDruggie
Apr 8, 2023
27
maybe see my brother once again for the last time, say goodbye to my boyfriend, and do a shit ton of acid.
i prob wont ctb but i been thinking about it, knowing me i would pussy out
 
loterius

loterius

Member
Sep 21, 2023
43
I just want to outlive my pets. I feel like no one else could take care of them as good as I do especially since they're commonly misunderstood animals. I can't imagine leaving the world just for someone to take them and just shove them in a cage...
If you can manage to outlife life too you should!. your pets would be grateful for it.
 
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cscott

cscott

Awaiting for life’s end ☠️
Jun 22, 2023
250
Looks like you pretty done here above ground, just like me. Its my euthanasia was rejected a few years back otherwise i wasnt even be here no more. It has makes things more complicated for me that rejection. But i have besides to finish a couple of video games too not much wishes after that and looking some explicit material i have on my pc then i want to make it definitive too. i get always that feeling to when you heard other people close to death want to do some quick joyful activity shortly before dying. drinking, sex that kind of stuff. That would be the only hard pill to swallow for me not be able to do that stuff no more when ur death. But i somehow can cope with that scenario already to as my body is fcked down enough due to self harm and my typical psychical man characteristics have plummet alot over the years so much sex wasnt on the cards anyway hahahh or a relationship. all other then that i have nothing to live for too.
Yh I don't even a slight desire. I don't want drink, sex, a chocolate. I don't ever feel I'll be missing anything. I have everything to gain pure freedom from this hell.
 
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リンさん

リンさん

Rina • she/her, lesbian
Sep 9, 2023
323
A ton of stuff, actually.

Visit as many countries as I can, see the ocean for the first time, go to a concert, get tattoos, dye my hair some crazy color lol. Fall in love. Replay my favorite games. Talk to people.

As many things as I can possibly fit in a few month-a year. Obviously I won't be able to do everything, but I wanna go out feeling like I have seen as much as I could.
 
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P

Princess Picta

Member
Sep 22, 2023
19
Find good homes for all my pets. Someone else said they want outlive theirs, but mine are mostly reptiles that can already outlive me even if I have a normal lifespan.
They are also the only thing keeping me alive for the most part so. It's just a lot.

I'd like to see a rainforest, give a public performance once in my life, find out what rabbit tastes like, maybe open up to my parents one last time. But what if it goes well and I get happy and I want to live again? It's happened before and I always ended up suicidal again after a year or two.

I would want to draft an actual will though, that seems important.
 
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fwompie

fwompie

pit rat
Aug 9, 2023
235
I'd say I have quite the list, it's moreso about whether or not I'll be able to stick around for that long.

I'd love to live with my partner, finish my education, get proper mental healthcare, finally get into gender dysphoria treatment and to finish a shit ton of books. Every day is just so hard.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
37,447
No, I personally don't see existence as being desirable or worth enduring at all, existing just doesn't interest me, I only wish for a peaceful, eternal sleep free from all suffering, existence just causes harm and it's tiring simply being conscious and aware. Existence is just so meaningless to me as well and it's comforting the thought of death erasing everything.
 
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loterius

loterius

Member
Sep 21, 2023
43
I decided to buy only a few more video games so the backlog of my videogames wont entlarge no more. Once these games are or the most finished and watch some vids a last time and get good drunk&high then i might finish it off with a lethal dose of prescriptions. I fucked it up myself very early in my life with shit that butched my body to the point were im in constant pain. Tried enough shit to fix it with supplements stretching therapy, medicines you name it. But it dont adding up.
And still i dont did it yet amazes me quite well. i choose to live isolated without contact expect my parents once in the few weeks. I just need to do it as soon most of my games are finished and get good drunk one last time. Its for me suicide like... ive bringing myself to this point/situation impossible wise. I tried to explain all this shit to these people of the expertisecentrum euthanasie in the netherlands den hague. But these cunts rejected me right away saying i dont suffering enough. i only had non official illness who give no validation of euthanasia. As of somebody else shortly have taken place into my body like a ghost and can decide this for me!. They must know where im going tru any day.
 
icantSleep

icantSleep

Member
Aug 1, 2023
53
Do u have certain wishes or a list of things you wanted to finish or doing before you make you decision to leave the earth?.
Like a vacation, some games you wanted to play first before you go.
I for instance have a long steam game library in which i wanted to finish first as most as possible as i have paid for the games and i like the challenge of finish the games, even if it means i have to pauze everly like 30 minutes break of 10 minutes to rest because gaming is that intensive for my body.
idk i think i will go to the park sit there and staring as Always then i'll buy vodka then i will go on my method with livestream
 
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swagattack

swagattack

Member
Sep 12, 2023
16
I just want to ride a motorcycle for the first time
 
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D

deep_end

How've you been?
Sep 9, 2023
32
The only thing I wanted to do was reach out to my sister and reconnect with her. I've sent her a few messages on FB to try and talk on her again but didn't get anything back. Since I tried everything I feel like I could, I'm content with that being my last thing I try to do.
 
silentcicada

silentcicada

Silhouettes on the ceiling
Aug 2, 2023
120
I'm visiting my ldr partner for the last time before I go.
 
girlsboysthems

girlsboysthems

no i dont have a gun
Dec 19, 2022
417
i want to change my name and try getting a new job and go to 3 concerts of bands and people that i absolutely adore and havent had the chance. and go to a concert of my favorite band again becuase i love them so much, theyve been with me through thick and thin and i just want to see them one last time.
 
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strawb12

strawb12

Student
Mar 26, 2023
184
I've wanted a motorcycle for a while but it never happened because starting that hobby would be expensive. But I have two achievable goals. I want to play Omori, & I want to read The Goldfinch. I think once I've done that I'll truly be complete & ready to go.
 
MatrixPrisoner

MatrixPrisoner

Enlightened
Jul 8, 2023
1,420
IMO, anyone who still has wishes or thoughts of the future isn't truly trying to CTB.
 
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Ashe

Ashe

Born to suffer for others
Sep 20, 2023
112
I've actually thought about this quite abit and most of it is in regard that I wish for people to respect my identity as I am now using my prefered name not dead naming or misgendering me in death. Along with communicating my passing to those who I hold dearly and for most of my possessions to be given to charity.
 
kelimackie

kelimackie

bleh
Sep 22, 2023
128
I want to die beautiful, so I'm working on losing some weight and toning up, play some games and read or watch my favorite books and movies
 
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lwlaiet8887

lwlaiet8887

Embodiment of failure/Doom poster/Compassionate
Sep 14, 2023
288
I'm bored of everything except alcohol and pizza/blind hedonism. I've done everything else an it's too boring for me to care.
 
アホペンギン

アホペンギン

Jul 10, 2023
2,199
I need to give some cats belly rubs and give all my friends a big hug before I ctb
 
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Blahhh

Blahhh

Member
Dec 13, 2022
69
I'd like to clean my home so others don't have to. Oh and travel! I wanna seet turquoise water
 
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G

Garboard

New Member
Sep 22, 2023
3
I'd like to apologise to an old best friend of mine for being the person I am and maybe write a biography if I'm not lazy so people can understand why I am the way I am, I have some secrets I probably shouldn't die with.
 
ClownCringe

ClownCringe

Know thy self
Jan 18, 2020
222
I want to beat survival instinct not fuel it lol
Ctbing is going to be a harrowing enough experience as is I don't need more obstruction in the form of desire.
 
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DragonWingsOnFire

DragonWingsOnFire

Living on hope that i will be happy some day
Mar 8, 2023
29
Idk, i just want to see what life can give me, maybe someday i would find my purpose or never, but i would not just die because, what if there is really nothing after death or something worse.
 
ClownCringe

ClownCringe

Know thy self
Jan 18, 2020
222
Idk, i just want to see what life can give me, maybe someday i would find my purpose or never, but i would not just die because, what if there is really nothing after death or something worse.
Pointless excuse for fear of death. What if the ultimate reward comes after CBT specifically? It's all nonsense copes to justify our reasoning.
 

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