Uselessatbest

Uselessatbest

Student
Oct 9, 2019
147
Why did I have to be born? Wish I was dead already.
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
  • Love
Reactions: Flump, Deleted member 1465, Lost in a Dream and 12 others
Freedent

Freedent

art hoe
Apr 19, 2020
42
I wish my parents didn't meet each other at all, nothing good came out of it
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: Flump, Painpleasure, Jumper Geo and 7 others
TheSoulless

TheSoulless

I'd like to fly but my wings have been so denied
Jan 7, 2020
1,055
Same, still a long way to go unfortunately
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: Flump, Jumper Geo, Final Escape and 4 others
Genetics

Genetics

Member
Apr 8, 2020
92
Why did I have to be born? Wish I was dead already.
Words of wisdom to me (not my 2 brothers, EVER) throughout my life until he committed suicide was:

It's not too late for us to get an abortion.

Let the love wash all over you!

I wish my father had been aborted. Then maybe my mom would have screwed someone who wasn't a pedophile (females only).
 
  • Aww..
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: Partial-Elf, Final Escape, WinterFaust and 6 others
LMLN

LMLN

Paragon
Aug 10, 2019
929
I feel the same. My relatives had wanted my mother to abort me but she refused. I wish now that I was aborted. It would have saved me from a lot of pain.
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
  • Like
Reactions: Flump, Buffy5120, Jumper Geo and 3 others
Q

qwerty32

I tried.
Apr 13, 2020
96
My mom told me she just wanted my two siblings but then I came along. My mom didn't say it in a mean way as though she didn't want me. I sometimes think about it and wish I was never born. There are times when I was young I wish there was poison in my dinner so I could die or I was secretly adopted and be a good reason to leave my family and live a loner life.

If I could give my life up so 10 others could have a better life, I do it.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: LMLN, Flump, Lost in a Dream and 5 others
Uselessatbest

Uselessatbest

Student
Oct 9, 2019
147
My mom told me she just wanted my two siblings but then I came along. My mom didn't say it in a mean way as though she didn't want me. I sometimes think about it and wish I was never born. There are times when I was young I wish there was poison in my dinner so I could die or I was secretly adopted and be a good reason to leave my family and live a loner life.

If I could give my life up so 10 others could have a better life, I do it.
oh my God I feel the same way. Im such a dissapointment. My brother and sister are a year apart and 8 years later I was born. I was a mjstake. so I totally feel you.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: WinterFaust, Jumper Geo, Hopeindeath! and 1 other person
Blackpoolbootz

Blackpoolbootz

If it sounds too good to be true it usually is.
Apr 19, 2020
97
I get what your saying reminds me of an episode of red dwarf "the inquisitor" I think if another person had been born in my place how much they could of accomplished how much determination they could of had to make a go of things and how much it could of workered out for them. A different sperm fertilisering the egg and small difference that leads to a bigger change.
 
  • Love
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: itsamadworld, Jumper Geo, WinterFaust and 2 others
U

UnluckyFew

Member
Apr 1, 2020
49
Yeah, it would've been better if I had been aborted. It's been a shitshow since the very beginning.
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: LMLN, WinterFaust and Hopeindeath!
Klee

Klee

Never play cards with a magician.
Apr 19, 2020
136
I wish to hell that I hadn't been born. I can't think of a single useful thing that I've contributed to the world.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
  • Aww..
Reactions: x-Ace-x, LMLN, Cutepoison and 3 others
xalltoowell

xalltoowell

Loner, loser and complicated wreck
Nov 3, 2019
56
Same. Some people just shouldn't procreate.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: LMLN, Let'sgetoutofHERE, Soul and 2 others
InterstateFlowers

InterstateFlowers

Experienced
Apr 16, 2020
236
I'm sorry. I saw the title of this thread and laughed because god damn it. I feel the same way too. It's a shame that I live a perfectly healthy life only for me to kill myself while others live with good parents that can provide for them, in a good stable home, and people that love them only to be shat on and have cancer or tuberculosis.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Deleted member 4993, Oyoy and xalltoowell
itsamadworld

itsamadworld

i wanna die somewhere like up there
Mar 15, 2020
410
I also wish the same...life is mostly suffering, then if one makes it too old age, it's humiliation on top of more suffering... Humans are so looks- centric, the system forces us to get old and whithered...to humiliate, and degrade the elderly, so they can sell their false anti-aging crap and medicines...They throw the bone to those they no longer see as young and beautiful to milk us like cash-cows...it's a discusting, shallow...It's a dog-eat-dog world....
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: x-Ace-x, xalltoowell, Painpleasure and 2 others
Shinbu

Shinbu

Shiki
Nov 23, 2019
477
I feel the same as well. Couldn't I at least be born in a society. That accept people for wanting to leave because being human, and experiencing reality sucks?. I'm always lost in some fictional book, video game, music, or anime because reality is that unappealing to me.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Lost in a Dream, itsamadworld and Uselessatbest
Jumper Geo

Jumper Geo

Life's a bitch and then you die.
Feb 23, 2020
2,910
My mum is from Ireland she told us when she was young she was going to emigrate to New Zealand and her father wouldn't sign the guardianship papers as it was to far away so instead she came to the UK where her brothers and sister were, what a bloody mistake that was.

I picture myself running through the fields chasing the sheep and lambs, lol.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: LMLN, Blackpoolbootz and Uselessatbest
Partial-Elf

Partial-Elf

Eternal Oblivion
Dec 26, 2018
461
Story time on this one. My parents have repeated this over the years: during the pregnancy, doctors told them I looked like some kind of abnormality and advised an abortion. My parents decided to roll the dice despite not being Catholic or otherwise particularly religious. They rolled well and I was born healthy (then immediately circumcised of course, but that's another story...). I guess I developed something of an abnormality over the years in the form of a death wish. I was that close to not being born and it frustrates me when I think about it because I don't want any of this. I just want to leave, preferably on good terms.
 
Last edited:
  • Aww..
  • Like
Reactions: Cutepoison, Blackpoolbootz and Uselessatbest
Painpleasure

Painpleasure

Student
Apr 9, 2019
108
My parents are out right CUNTS for consciously and deliberately subjecting me to this sick, cold and evil world. I vow to return the favour and make them experience unthinkable pain before I kill myself. I will certainly kill myself before they die. How cruel of them to expect me to witness their death but for them to not witness mine. I will make them atone for their grave mistake and open their eyes to the despicable reality of the world we live in.

They will suffer, immensely. I can only guarantee this. This is all I want.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Lost in a Dream and itsamadworld
P

PDAnnie2610

Waiting for my bus.
Oct 27, 2019
701
I wish the same thing too. Greatest mistake made was to be alive.
 
  • Like
Reactions: x-Ace-x
Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,704
My parents had no business having children.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gonegirl90, Painpleasure and Lost in a Dream
faust

faust

lost among the stars
Jan 26, 2020
3,138
I could actually be aborted. My mother always wanted a daughter and when she was checking the sex of the future baby, doctors told her it was going to be a girl.
Father was against one more child and agreed only because mother wanted a daughter.
That's why I am still wandering on this planet.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Lost in a Dream
Lost in a Dream

Lost in a Dream

He/him - Metal head
Feb 22, 2020
1,771
My parents are out right CUNTS for consciously and deliberately subjecting me to this sick, cold and evil world. I vow to return the favour and make them experience unthinkable pain before I kill myself. I will certainly kill myself before they die. How cruel of them to expect me to witness their death but for them to not witness mine. I will make them atone for their grave mistake and open their eyes to the despicable reality of the world we live in.

They will suffer, immensely. I can only guarantee this. This is all I want.

What you have described is exactly what I want to do to my dad. My mom has passed away, so I couldn't say the same about her, but the fact is I totally agree with you about all of this. It also does not help that my parents wanted me to exist for the purpose of exploiting me. The only good thing that I can say is that I wasn't used for terrible things, but it is still the case that when I was a kid I overheard a private conversation between my dad and a friend of his where he said he wanted a son so he could use me to help him with all of his pet projects and doing chores.

Of course, I have no interest whatsoever in any of the things he is interested in, which are the very same things he always tried to make me help him with. When doing so, he wasn't doing it for the purpose of teaching me important life skills that could benefit me, it was all about doing things he wanted and doing them his way, otherwise he would get pissed off because I did something wrong. I almost attempted to murder him with a weed whip once when I was about 10 or 11. I didn't do it of course, but the thought was there because he was standing over my shoulder and screaming at me because I was not doing it right. The reason that I wasn't learning how to do things properly is because I expected him to overreact if I did it wrong, so I didn't want to do it at all, and my expectations turned out to be 100% correct. Perhaps if he hadn't even been around, I could have taught myself how to do it and everything would have been great.

Now days he seems to have changed from back then. He isn't as much of an asshole as he used to be (at least not to me). At first I thought the reason was because he felt bad for the way he behaved in the past and that he wanted to make up for it, but I've come to realize that this might not be the case at all. I recently discovered that he is involved in some family drama and his sudden character change only occurred at the peak of it. It seems like he only wants me to take his side (he mentions the drama more often than I would like), so he's suddenly acting nicer because he thinks that might work. I could be wrong about his intentions, but given the circumstances, it's really difficult for me to be sure. All I know is, I don't want to get anywhere near that drama and I sometimes feel like cutting everyone out of my life would be beneficial, but I don't yet have the ability to do it.

I have often felt like it would have been better if I had either been aborted or miscarried. I have also thought that it would have been better if I had died when I was a baby, which is something that almost happened due to a hemorrhage, but I somehow survived that. At the current moment, I've made the decision to give life another shot, but I will only be doing it for me, rather than other people, most of whom only ever seemed to be interested in me as long as I kept doing favors for them (there are only a couple of exceptions to this). When the time comes that I feel like I am ready to CTB, I really hope my dad is still alive because I want him to be the one to read my note. I'll explain my reasons and the exact ways in which he contributed to it. Maybe I am an asshole in my own way for wanting to do that, but it doesn't stop me from thinking about it and he will realize that he brought it on himself.

Also, I want to mention that some of the posts in this thread are from people saying that their existence was a mistake, but I often think that existing because your parents wanted you to is no better. Most parents (if not all of them) only make the decision to have children for selfish reasons. If they were going to make a decision that was going to benefit the child then they wouldn't have any! When we are born, all of us end up getting dragged into this world kicking and screaming, so what does that tell you? The best thing anyone could do for their kids is not forcing them to exist in the first place. I totally understand that if everyone felt this way, the human race would go extinct, but why would that be a bad thing? Just something to think about.

I didn't intend on writing a novel, but when I find a thread that makes me want to say something, I end up ranting lol.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: Painpleasure and Deleted member 1465
D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
I was a mistake. Premature by a month. On birth the docs said I wouldn't survive the night. So get this...being Catholics, who diD my parents call in? An emergency priest! So I could be baptised.
But I have a strong survival instinct and made it through. I was christened later and so have been baptised twice. I also had two crowns of hair on my head, though these days that hair is gone where I scratch out of anxiety and ocd.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: Epsilon0, Blackpoolbootz and Lost in a Dream
Blackpoolbootz

Blackpoolbootz

If it sounds too good to be true it usually is.
Apr 19, 2020
97
I was a mistake. Premature by a month. On birth the docs said I wouldn't survive the night. So get this...being Catholics, who diD my parents call in? An emergency priest! So I could be baptised.
But I have a strong survival instinct and made it through. I was christened later and so have been baptised twice. I also had two crowns of hair on my head, though these days that hair is gone where I scratch out of anxiety and ocd. Think to myself what if I died, thought alot when I was young.

Sounds like my birth was christened after I was born just incase I didn't survive born prematurely had to goto a specialist baby care unit that was 40 miles away.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Deleted member 1465

Similar threads

C
Replies
71
Views
2K
Suicide Discussion
Leiot
Leiot
depressedstupidgirl
Replies
26
Views
611
Suicide Discussion
Gustav Hartmann
Gustav Hartmann
Sunghoon
Replies
0
Views
154
Suicide Discussion
Sunghoon
Sunghoon
UnnervedCompany
Replies
4
Views
214
Recovery
BoulderSoWhat
BoulderSoWhat