will my friends actually miss me

[angelana]

i literally cause so many problems and i everyone always leaves me so i feel like it would just make everyone happier and take a weight off their shoulder if i cbt so would they actually miss me?

 

[oneofakind]

I'm pretty sure if they're your friends they will miss you. They're friends with you for a reason, whatever you may think

 

[Lulzacruel]

Think about why you are friends.

If it's because your relatable, nice to them, open, and freely speak to your issues, then i heavily doubt they will think negatively about you.

 

[gulp]

depends what kind of friends they are. the only real life ones i have just like me because of the personality i rarely have, they've never asked if i was feeling right when i clearly wasn't.

if u have friends like those, then i think they won't miss much

 

[Cloud Busting]

How do you cause problems?

I cannot say with any certainty. Neither can you. Just be prepared for the fact that people may miss you when you're gone. Remember that you're not responsible for the feelings or reactions of others. It's up to you to decide if you want to take the risk of people grieving or not.

What you've described is how I felt before my attempt. People's reactions proved that I was dead wrong. Personally I am not holding on for others. It's selfish to expect someone to sacrifice their pain for others. If my loved ones truly love me, they would understand and make peace with their grief. They'd be sad, yet relieved I'm free of suffering.

What made me hold off is realizing I wasn't thinking clearly, as everything I believed ended up not being true. Im trying to recover, and if I cannot, well I'll ctb then. I at least have to try.

In retrospect, I think I convinced myself I was a terrible person who destroyed people as justification. I am not implying this is you. Im just offering this possibility so you can entertain it for yourself.

You seem uncertain about CTB. If this is true, mull it over. CTB is a weighty decision to be taken seriously. If you hold off for now, you can always CTB later. If you CTB now, you can't take it back.