Whys it gotta be this way

[JustfcknKillme]

There's only one person on this earth that's keeping me here and once they go that's it for me I'll literally have no hope and no reason to even try. This fucking sucks.
Why do I suck at living.

 

[First loss]

I understand you, friend. Life is stupid in general and I know how it is to fail in every aspect of it. Maybe it would help if you tried to live only for yourself, and not for others. It kinda helps me.

 

[JustfcknKillme]

I understand you, friend. Life is stupid in general and I know how it is to fail in every aspect of it. Maybe it would help if you tried to live only for yourself, and not for others. It kinda helps me.

I've tried everything. Things aren't just adding up and never make sense. Whenever I'm busy whether it be work or things I enjoy doing there's always something looming in the back of my mind. I'm just so empty.

 

[First loss]

I've tried everything. Things aren't just adding up and never make sense. Whenever I'm busy whether it be work or things I enjoy doing there's always something looming in the back of my mind. I'm just so empty.

That is just the way it is, unfortunately. Demon in your mind, if you will. You will always have something fucking you up like that. Try keeping yourself busy with some things and find some immersive activities to cope with.

 

[Sweet emotion]

I hate it when people ask me this but have you ever been to therapy and we're really honest about your feelings? If it's an emotional problem that you have there is a chance it can be helped. Even if it's a mental problem. I know because at age 15 my OCD was so basically I wanted to die but I found an amazing therapist who helped me with that particular problem and I've been rid of it ever since. I'm 34 now. I'm leaving this Earth because I have Complex Regional Pain Syndrome which is the highest ranking pain condition in medical history. I've had it for 14 years, ever since I was 20. I swear I never imagined pain like this could exist. People actually have their limbs amputated to try and get rid of the pain but surgery makes the condition worse. I'm the 1% situation where I have it inside the ears and head and face. So I can't talk or listen to others talk or any kind of noise. And you can't live life without listening to noise so I've been in solitary confinement in my home for 14 years. If there is anything you can do to better your situation I encourage it because life can be really wonderful. But if not I wish you a peaceful exit. The best of luck to you.

 

[JustfcknKillme]

I hate it when people ask me this but have you ever been to therapy and we're really honest about your feelings? If it's an emotional problem that you have there is a chance it can be helped. Even if it's a mental problem. I know because at age 15 my OCD was so basically I wanted to die but I found an amazing therapist who helped me with that particular problem and I've been rid of it ever since. I'm 34 now. I'm leaving this Earth because I have Complex Regional Pain Syndrome which is the highest ranking pain condition in medical history. I've had it for 14 years, ever since I was 20. I swear I never imagined pain like this could exist. People actually have their limbs amputated to try and get rid of the pain but surgery makes the condition worse. I'm the 1% situation where I have it inside the ears and head and face. So I can't talk or listen to others talk or any kind of noise. And you can't live life without listening to noise so I've been in solitary confinement in my home for 14 years. If there is anything you can do to better your situation I encourage it because life can be really wonderful. But if not I wish you a peaceful exit. The best of luck to you.

I've tried talking to a therapist but I got nothing from it. I know my post can be taken a certain way but life's been shit pretty much my whole life. To top it all of when I thought I'd have a chance at a family the day of my sons delivery when I arrived at the hospital I found out he was a still born just an hour later. After that my life spiraled out of control. I just wanted that family and it got ripped away for a reason we still don't know. I'm sorry to hear about that that sounds so painful. Thanks for the advice and hopeful words tho

 

[Sweet emotion]

I've tried talking to a therapist but I got nothing from it. I know my post can be taken a certain way but life's been shit pretty much my whole life. To top it all of when I thought I'd have a chance at a family the day of my sons delivery when I arrived at the hospital I found out he was a still born just an hour later. After that my life spiraled out of control. I just wanted that family and it got ripped away for a reason we still don't know. I'm sorry to hear about that that sounds so painful. Thanks for the advice and hopeful words tho

You're very welcome. What kills me is I'm going to die without ever knowing what love feels like. I'm sorry you had to go through that with your son. I never wanted children but I can't imagine how horrifying that must have been.