Why the wait?

[Cantbereal]

Maybe because i'm in horrific pain I can't see waiting. That's why i'm here. Waiting would make me think you couldn't possibly be in dire straits. Like I need to die now. I just can't find the way. I hate this.

 

[FuneralCry]

Your feelings of wanting to be free from this life are understandable, but of course suicide can certainly be very difficult even know we wish to leave. To me this is very unfair, and it really is such a cruel world that we live in where all this extreme suffering exists. I hope that you find the freedom that you are looking for.

 

[Sad_Sack]

Maybe because i'm in horrific pain I can't see waiting. That's why i'm here. Waiting would make me think you couldn't possibly be in dire straits. Like I need to die now. I just can't find the way. I hate this.

I'm sorry. Are you in physical pain, mental pain or both. I am in both and am trying to get into the proper mindset to finally end it within this week. I can't handle anymore of this. I wont be able to use gas as I had wanted because of financial reasons so I am down to two methods I have found most acceptable though neither is very comfortable at all. This is all just terrible.

 

[Cantbereal]

I'm sorry. Are you in physical pain, mental pain or both. I am in both and am trying to get into the proper mindset to finally end it within this week. I can't handle anymore of this. I wont be able to use gas as I had wanted because of financial reasons so I am down to two methods I have found most acceptable though neither is very comfortable at all. This is all just terrible.

Both. I have gadolinium POISONING and have been suffering benzodiazepines withdrawal syndrome for 3 years. Inhumane genocide worse every day. Bedridden 105 lb. Was 180 my entire adult life i'm 49. I need out now! I tried partial hanging today a d knelt down...I haven't done that in 2 years so now I screwed my back and hips. More pain no relief. I'm sorry for you too. This is all horrific! I'm out of my mind!

 

[jodes2]

Sorry you're suffering

 

[Cantbereal]

Yes.......Sorry you're suffering

Yes.... so am I. Thank you.

 

[MidnightDream]

I'm so sorry. Are there no methods available to you? If not SN, the peaceful death programme thing? Surely you would qualify given the extent of your physical suffering? Apologies, I don't know much about it. Wishing you peace <3

 

[Sad_Sack]

Both. I have gadolinium POISONING and have been suffering benzodiazepines withdrawal syndrome for 3 years. Inhumane genocide worse every day. Bedridden 105 lb. Was 180 my entire adult life i'm 49. I need out now! I tried partial hanging today a d knelt down...I haven't done that in 2 years so now I screwed my back and hips. More pain no relief. I'm sorry for you too. This is all horrific! I'm out of my mind!

I'm 48 and was on benzodiazepines from 17 to 36 years old withdrawal was hell. The prescribing doctor let me come off cold turkey at 34 years old and almost killed me. I went back on and found a doc that tapered me very slowly over a year and it went smoother but I am damaged by the use of them. Those and ssri's. Cant think anymore. Cant feel anymore. On top of that I have chronic illnesses and residual effects from years of prednisone and immunosuppresants.

Gadolinium poisoning sounds awful. Did you have a lot of scans done for this to happen may I ask? I'm sorry you hurt yourself with the partial hanging attempt. I've tentatively tested that and I personally could not go through with that method. I am 100% with you with being out of your mind with all of this. Its absolutely the worst and I just can't believe it all came to this!