Why should I live

[Prime0]

Why should I live I don't get the point to get all of that stress and stuff, to chase materialistic desires? I bought myself a few "cool" things that most people would probably dream of but they didn't really give me a pleasure or whatsoever at all, I mean what's even the point of life especially after turning 18 and starting to earn money, to chase money? To chase materialistic desires? What's really the point why should I live? I don't think I would even want to be rich tbh this life seem very futile to me and I don't really get why people live either, like, is the whole point to distract myself with meaningless stupid things until I die? Is the whole point to chase desires desires desires and desires until we die? What if it's worthless for me, that I don't take any kind of pleasure? I would kill myself if I could but I'm scared of failing, espescially considering that I'm an adult and all now I would have problems.
Non existence seem so damn peaceful to me, I really cannot support this life anymore and most importantly wouldn't want to, I don't like anything anymore that I used to like when I was a child, now I can possibly achieve anything "I want", that I couldn't when I was a child, but they seem so futile to me... I would kill myself I could but it's very hard to leave this existence.
Please help me, please help me, please help me, and stop saying bullshits like go to therapist and all, they're merely distractions and nothing but nothing changes the fact that our existence is pointless and we go all of these hardships for nothing, I don't get the point of this existence and probably never possibly could, what's even the point of continuing to live when you don't like anything anymore?
Please help me, how can I kill myself, I want it to be peaceful.
I wouldn't even want to be rich from this miserable life, it's really so pointless... I just want to be in peace forever.

 

[Elle]

I don't want to encourage you but I do hope you can find peace either by living or CTB, <3

 

[Prime0]

I don't want to encourage you but I do hope you can find peace either by living or CTB, <3

Thanks, no amount of materialistic comfort or whatsoever can bring peace to me, to be honest happiest days of my life were when I used to be a child and a teenager, but now... Since I've turned 18 and started to work everything started to seem pointless and boring, I don't get what's the motivation of people to live, let's assume that I've become rich (which, doesn't interest me at all), then what? Escapism used to be waaaaaaay more fun than this "real life".
I don't see a single good reason to keep living honestly, I don't get why I shouldn't kill myself despite the fact that I'm gonna be in peace eternally, and these suicidal thoughts come and go, especially when I'm having a good time, but deep inside of me, what I want the most is to die, I don't get the point I just don't get the point and I'm not enjoying this ride it's not a fun one.
You can encourage me as well, I would prefer it instead of a "don't kill yourself because you shouldn't.
Like, I should participate to the rat race? Is this what life is about? Chasing money and materialism? I mean they can be fun for a while sure but that's only temporary.
I don't want to succeed, I want to be in peace.

 

[Elle]

Thanks, no amount of materialistic comfort or whatsoever can bring peace to me, to be honest happiest days of my life were when I used to be a child and a teenager, but now... Since I've turned 18 and started to work everything started to seem pointless and boring, I don't get what's the motivation of people to live, let's assume that I've become rich (which, doesn't interest me at all), then what? Escapism used to be waaaaaaay more fun than this "real life".
I don't see a single good reason to keep living honestly, I don't get why I shouldn't kill myself despite the fact that I'm gonna be in peace eternally, and these suicidal thoughts come and go, especially when I'm having a good time, but deep inside of me, what I want the most is to die, I don't get the point I just don't get the point and I'm not enjoying this ride it's not a fun one.
You can encourage me as well, I would prefer it instead of a "don't kill yourself because you shouldn't"

Honestly, it's up to you. On this site is many ways, but I wouldn't encourage suicide. But like I said, with whatever you decide, I hope you can find some sort of peace from all this pain you're in.

 

[FuneralCry]

Your feelings towards existence certainly are understandable, to me existing is completely unappealing and undesirable, it's just a futile process of waiting around to die. To me there could never be a point to any of this, we are just enduring meaningless existences, destined to decay until somehow death will free us of this burden, eternal non-existence also sounds so ideal to me as well and it's the only relief.

I could never see any benefit to being conscious and aware, having the ability to suffer so extremely all while aware of how truly pointless it all is. But anyway I hope that you eventually find what you search for, I hate how suicide is purposely made so difficult in this world, to me it's inhumane denying people the right to die in peace.

 

[Cute_&_Loving]

I'm with you. Rich or not, I don't wanna be a part of this wretched world But. Tnh, I wouldn't mind having tons of money to give myself 3-4 or less years to hang out, to see the world, possibly help animals and people in need and then to f**k off using Sarco pod or something. If you're adamant to leave, it's one of the best places to look for method info. I'm not advertising anything, but good luck with whatever you decide to do!! I'm sorry you'ree in such emotional pain. I know how hard it feels.

 

[way_of_meatgrinder]

Maybe my attitude towards physical things influenced by parenting and environment, but I always felt spending money on things was my coping mechanism. And past few years I stopped caring about material world too much, you know, everything is so volatile. Forget about material things, feelings are so unstable! I noticed it with physical pain, it hurts but when you like dive deeper into it, it start feeling like a wind or a growing grass. Hunger is very strange too, at some point it is unbearable but after some time it just settles somewhere inside. Desires are the same, you can just wait it out and it is gone!
I dont know where im going with it, but your post reminded me about volatility of physical world.

 

[Elle]

*hugs*

 

[way_of_meatgrinder]

Your feelings towards existence certainly are understandable, to me existing is completely unappealing and undesirable, it's just a futile process of waiting around to die. To me there could never be a point to any of this, we are just enduring meaningless existences, destined to decay until somehow death will free us of this burden, eternal non-existence also sounds so ideal to me as well and it's the only relief.

I could never see any benefit to being conscious and aware, having the ability to suffer so extremely all while aware of how truly pointless it all is. But anyway I hope that you eventually find what you search for, I hate how suicide is purposely made so difficult in this world, to me it's inhumane denying people the right to die in peace.

Yeah, totally agree about existence. Especially if you aware of it. Like this flow of stuff. Kinda scary))))