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Rational man

Rational man

Enlightened
Oct 19, 2021
1,485
Its strange when I wake to the fact that my family are dysfunctional. And yet hidden behind their false smiles are narcissists, hypocrites and abusers and when I say abuse I mean emotional abuse. No child should be bullied and deprived of basics needs of unconditional love. That ' wake up ' call hit me like a train !. NORMAL behaviour was in fact abusive and I only realised when I was 18 Years, and that was some Years ago..

My grandad gassed himself and my Father attempted to si by diving under a lorry.( He failed ) ...Not behaviour a child should want to see.

What im saying is I never let these experiences define who I am. As an adult , I felt the need to be independent and I survived, but of course, illness has forced me to consider options.

Whatsoever happens to you, Its not your fault if you have lived amongst the dysfunctional family. Afterall, we don't choose our parents.

My send off, when it arrives will be free of hypocrites and abusers. There will no-one crying politely.

Take care
 
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Smart No More

Visionary
May 5, 2021
2,734
I can relate to you. I had a mentally abusive parent. Oddly interspersed with loving moments. It's confusing to a child. I was an only child, only gaining a sibling after leaving home. I watched carefully in support of him and he had a better childhood than me which I'm happy for. It's dunny though, how these things shape us. I know you say you didn't let it shape you but ultimately I feel maybe it did inadvertently. In a positive way I mean. I say that for 2 reason. One is that I identify with you even down to your user name. I also, much like yourself left and found independence and found my place in a positive space. I don't think that's coincidence for us. Maybe more a tribute/indicator of where we've been and how we've handled. Many go the other way and pay it forward in the worst way so yay us I guess. I'm just sad that my final act will fly in the face of my values in regards to not negatively impacting people. Especially my brother and my cat. I cane even type thar without crying. I do knkw what you mean though, polite tears are also not welcome here. No going through the motion for the sake of appearances or shrouded guilt. People who don't practice what they preach and throw word around like they have no value. Fuckers!
 
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Rational man

Rational man

Enlightened
Oct 19, 2021
1,485
I can relate to you. I had a mentally abusive parent. Oddly interspersed with loving moments. It's confusing to a child. I was an only child, only gaining a sibling after leaving home. I watched carefully in support of him and he had a better childhood than me which I'm happy for. It's dunny though, how these things shape us. I know you say you didn't let it shape you but ultimately I feel maybe it did inadvertently. In a positive way I mean. I say that for 2 reason. One is that I identify with you even down to your user name. I also, much like yourself left and found independence and found my place in a positive space. I don't think that's coincidence for us. Maybe more a tribute/indicator of where we've been and how we've handled. Many go the other way and pay it forward in the worst way so yay us I guess. I'm just sad that my final act will fly in the face of my values in regards to not negatively impacting people. Especially my brother and my cat. I cane even type thar without crying. I do knkw what you mean though, polite tears are also not welcome here. No going through the motion for the sake of appearances or shrouded guilt. People who don't practice what they preach and throw word around like they have no value. Fuckers!
Thanks. I understand where you are coming from. Childhood abuse has affected me but it hasnt traumatised me utterly and completely, I think. I mean I carved out my own life, had a great love relationship for a few Years. If i hadn't broken free from my dysfunctional parents, i wouldn't have experienced aforementioned. Some stuff comes back to haunt me occasionally. I try to let it pass like a dark cloud.
 
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Smart No More

Visionary
May 5, 2021
2,734
Yeah, I guess I'm just saying you turned it into a positive so in that respect it shaped but it didn't get it's claws in you and that is testament to a strength of mind that many don't have.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,558
Some people are just so cruel. I'm sorry you had that experience, no child should have to go through that. I wish you the best, when the time comes for you to leave, I hope you find peace.
 
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Rational man

Rational man

Enlightened
Oct 19, 2021
1,485
Some people are just so cruel. I'm sorry you had that experience, no child should have to go through that. I wish you the best, when the time comes for you to leave, I hope you find peace.
Thanks. I send regards to you. ❤
 
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