Why can’t I?

[farakini]

I've heard of multiple suicides in the news this week and instead of feeling concerned about it, I was moreso jealous that their attempts were successful and I've been trying to hang myself for months……MONTHS!!!! What the actual fuck!!

 

[FuneralCry]

I always envy those who have left this world as well. They are lucky as they cannot suffer anymore. It makes hanging sound so much easier than it actually is when you hear of all these people who ctb that way. Suicide certainly shouldn't be this difficult.

 

[jodes2]

I get jealous too. Wish I could just be gone!

 

[Littlewittlelight]

I can't cry but I only know how I managed to get only meto today I am feeling dizzy again super dizzy. I rode bike for so long it sucks that I still have to do this. I visited around 40-50 shops in total for all the things SN, propranolol, meto. These motherfuckers denied to give SN and propranolol but I atleast got meto and I feel bad that I got only one strip at first chemist then the other one asked me how many you want so I again said only 1 10mg strip of 10 tablets now I have 200mg which sucks that's the required quantity I will try to get SN atleast from online and check again at local shops because they kept giving me directions or raising eyebrows or getting fed up so quick when I asked they denied to even tell if I can get it somewhere but I found a couple so good people who said If we had I would give it they gave me names of shops I felt so weak so I got home today I will go someday and try to get them and also asked if I can come back to them for help or info they said sure and a couple people told they also used to get SN 20 years ago but now they aren't sure if those shops would give it's somewhere close my college I will look for it. I will anyhow get these I can't go living in this world without the will and feeling dizzy half the time. I am done I just want to be gone anyhow by next year as soon as possible and I will make my way this country has people who are poor and good they could help me get it, I could get it from online hoping because I found some websites and even one on a famous e-commerce so yes I will even try to make connections get prescription anything and get extra supplies for two attempts in case I fail and I think I will do something to get better control over my instinct I think I will pass out quicker as I am weak and my disease so I really hope I just get these. I feel so bad today I wish someone strangled me.

I get jealous too. Wish I could just be gone!

 

[jodes2]

I can't cry but I only know how I managed to get only meto today I am feeling dizzy again super dizzy. I rode bike for so long it sucks that I still have to do this. I visited around 40-50 shops in total for all the things SN, propranolol, meto. These motherfuckers denied to give SN and propranolol but I atleast got meto and I feel bad that I got only one strip at first chemist then the other one asked me how many you want so I again said only 1 10mg strip of 10 tablets now I have 200mg which sucks that's the required quantity I will try to get SN atleast from online and check again at local shops because they kept giving me directions or raising eyebrows or getting fed up so quick when I asked they denied to even tell if I can get it somewhere but I found a couple so good people who said If we had I would give it they gave me names of shops I felt so weak so I got home today I will go someday and try to get them and also asked if I can come back to them for help or info they said sure and a couple people told they also used to get SN 20 years ago but now they aren't sure if those shops would give it's somewhere close my college I will look for it. I will anyhow get these I can't go living in this world without the will and feeling dizzy half the time. I am done I just want to be gone anyhow by next year as soon as possible and I will make my way this country has people who are poor and good they could help me get it, I could get it from online hoping because I found some websites and even one on a famous e-commerce so yes I will even try to make connections get prescription anything and get extra supplies for two attempts in case I fail and I think I will do something to get better control over my instinct I think I will pass out quicker as I am weak and my disease so I really hope I just get these. I feel so bad today I wish someone strangled me.

Pm me for SN / propranolol sources. Sorry you've had to do so much hunting around *hugs* I'd strangle you if I could lol

 

[chloramine]

It's really frustrating when you try and can't while other people manage it yeah. Some people just happen to get the right set of circumstances to make it work. Some of them may have been where you are- super frustrated and not being able to get it to work- until that one time it did. It's not you being incapable. Seeing the end result without any context makes it look easier than it is.