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W

wCvML2

Member
Nov 15, 2021
452
my life is great and I have everything that I need, but no matter what - I'll always be stuck as the same person, doing the same mistakes over and over again.

I wanted to kill myself for a really long time, just to cut my life off and not have to deal with people anymore...

I think I'll ctb tomorrow in the morning. I'll text to work that I'm sick and then just hang myself when I'm home alone.
 
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C

CommitSudoku

never interfere with a lifespan reaping
Feb 12, 2022
524
I hate myself and that's definitely part of why I want out of life. Between that, depression, and anxiety and others, every day is torture and effects me physically now. From an outside view my life probably seems good to others. It's all faking, covering up the reality. As you said as well I'll always be stuck as the same person or worse since I become less of anyone I want to be as time goes on. I'm sorry you feel the way you do, it's hard to deal with and so painful to be mentally tortured. Best wishes whatever you decide to do.
 
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D

downndone2

Living in misery
Jan 23, 2022
1,270
Absolutely 100%
 
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Huntfish34

Huntfish34

Enlightened
Mar 13, 2020
1,619
Yep,. Because of my extreme hatred towards myself/ others, and numerous other things. I wish I could let things Go and hold my head high but I can't seem to do it. All is easier said than done. Fml -
 
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W

wCvML2

Member
Nov 15, 2021
452
Yep,. Because of my extreme hatred towards myself/ others, and numerous other things. I wish I could let things Go and hold my head high but I can't seem to do it. All is easier said than done. Fml -
yeah, I've tried everything from east to west and I've tried to look at things from endless different perspectives, but I still feel the same and can't let go of my hatered.

It would have been a lot easier to just not have existed in the first place... god dammit.
 
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WorthlessTrash

WorthlessTrash

Worthless
Apr 19, 2022
2,430
Me 100%.
 
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Achlys

Achlys

So tired...
Apr 23, 2022
143
<--
 
Last edited:
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.............

.............

Experienced
Mar 5, 2022
226
Definitely one of my main reasons.
 
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C

Cactuscraze

Member
Apr 29, 2022
23
I don't hate myself, just my circumstances since I have a chronic pain condition. I feel so trapped because it's not something you can just move on over time from like some other issues I had in the past could be
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,776
I hate being myself, but to me life is the problem rather than me. Life is what I hate instead, it is horrifying that this life is even a thing in the first place. Existence itself is the cause of all suffering, I never asked to be here and I never should have been born. I hope you find relief from your pain in whatever happens. This life really can be so awful as our thoughts can torture us.
 
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O

outrider567

Visionary
Apr 5, 2022
2,866
Just the opposite, I like myself, am in perfect health and financially secure--But with my girlfriend deceased, nothing means anything to me anymore....and now my only brother dying of lung cancer just makes it worse--At least I had the thought that my money would go to my brother(he has none and is still working)but now that scenario is gone
 
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thedaywillcome

thedaywillcome

I will leave soon
Apr 2, 2022
358
Absolutely 100%

I am a total failure by nature.
 
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T

Treeline589

Experienced
Dec 14, 2021
234
Yep, it's my main reason
 
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adesertrose

adesertrose

18. Feel free to PM me !
Apr 28, 2022
14
Self-hatred is my main reason. I don't like anything I was born into, except maybe my gender, and date of birth. There are things I was born as but could never change
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
9,001
Wouldn't we all have to hate ourselves a bit to cash our lives in? If you go through with ctb tomorrow, I wish you the best, and may you find the pain-free, peaceful place that you seek.
 
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H

Hurt

Paragon
Nov 13, 2020
905
Me. I cant face another year
 
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sunsetting

sunsetting

Student
Jun 9, 2021
100
Yeah, I hate myself for my condition. Being born in the wrong country where I can't identify myself with nothing over here. I hate the culture, the people, even the damn weather lol. I wish I had the power to just leave and be somewhere else far away, maybe if I abandon it all I'll have some respite.
 
Weebster

Weebster

Everyone is alone. Everyone is empty.
Mar 11, 2022
1,683
I like me but I hate how the abuse altered me making me insecure and pathetic. Women who show interest are always confused when I seem awkward. I look like I talk well all the time.
 
Alcoholic Teletubby

Alcoholic Teletubby

Rip in piss
Jan 10, 2022
452
Yes. I can't stand living with myself every day.
 
Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
21,387
Yup. I hate myself so much for how much I hate myself. I've gone so far down that the thought of success fills me with disgust. They say you shouldn't have to forgive your abusers and as my biggest abuser, I'd rather kill him, that is, me, even if it takes me down too.
 
J

Journeytoletgo

Broken and hated 7-14 years long overdue
May 14, 2018
1,608
Yeah I hate myself before even the abuse I endured from those men because of my biological skin disorder
 
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S

stupid little girl

always sad
Nov 28, 2019
35
Me! I can't seem to remember a time when I ever liked myself. I've always hated myself even if I didn't outright say it. Regardless of my academic "accomplishments", I don't feel proud of myself. No matter how much weight I lose I never look in the mirror and think I'm attractive. At best I look and say to myself, "I look less ugly today" and that's on my best days. I have terrible intrusive thoughts and I can be so selfish and horrible. I'm just sucking the life and resources out of others and I'd be better off dead. I truly hate myself and I don't understand why I was born. I think I'm disgusting, useless, and replaceable. So, yeah I have a lot of self-hatred and it's one of my reasons for wanting to ctb.
 
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