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E

Endeavour

Mage
Dec 13, 2020
566
Yeah I found that out when I came back on the first of this month (been gone since a few days before new year's.) When I checked my profile page, that was a real "WTF?!" moment for me. Damn, never felt that bad before from something on here. I really hope she didn't do that just because of me. Her name wasn't crossed out so maybe she didn't go through with it after all?
I think she had a cascade of things in her life - work, doctors, etc that pushed her over the edge.

Part of the things she said were that she didn't want to be part of a world that took wonderful people like you & Woxi, so yes, her belief that you had gone will have played some part, but it isn't something you should beat yourself up over, if it wasn't you it would have been someone else.

In fact even if she knew you were still here, I still think she'd have done it, the entire 26 malarkey and all the other stuff I think had created a pressure cooker of emotions inside her that she couldn't control.

She is definitely gone, her obituary is online, and her letter to the media etc have been given air time.

She 100% caught the bus.
 
Wayfaerer

Wayfaerer

JFMSUF
Aug 21, 2019
1,938
I think she had a cascade of things in her life - work, doctors, etc that pushed her over the edge.

Part of the things she said were that she didn't want to be part of a world that took wonderful people like you & Woxi, so yes, her belief that you had gone will have played some part, but it isn't something you should beat yourself up over, if it wasn't you it would have been someone else.

In fact even if she knew you were still here, I still think she'd have done it, the entire 26 malarkey and all the other stuff I think had created a pressure cooker of emotions inside her that she couldn't control.

She is definitely gone, her obituary is online, and her letter to the media etc have been given air time.

She 100% caught the bus.

WOW, damn. Perhaps she still would've caught the bus if i were here but if she was that fragile then I would've stayed. Maybe I could've persuaded her? Who knows, but I won't beat myself up over it as I have a deterministic outlook on things. She was right that I was going to die but her timing was off by a matter of months.

She made it on the news?
 
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E

Endeavour

Mage
Dec 13, 2020
566
WOW, damn. Perhaps she still would've caught the bus if i were here but if she was that fragile then I would've stayed. Maybe I could've persuaded her? Who knows, but I won't beat myself up over it as I have a deterministic outlook on things. She was right that I was going to die but her timing was off by a matter of months.

She made it on the news?
Supposedly so, but surely you know this if you've, as I presume you must have, read her final post and the comments that followed.

Sorry if this is misplaced but your WOW I didn't realise, after you found out she ctb is somewhat disingenuous.

Which rather makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up a bit.
 
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Wayfaerer

Wayfaerer

JFMSUF
Aug 21, 2019
1,938
Supposedly so, but surely you know this if you've, as I presume you must have, read her final post and the comments that followed.

People say they are going to kill themselves all the time, doesn't mean that they do. <5% of people kill themselves on this board it seems even after saying "I'm TOTALLY GOING TO DO IT NOW!!1!11".
Sorry if this is misplaced but your WOW I didn't realise, after you found out she ctb is somewhat disingenuous.

Why? I meant it, it totally caught me off guard.
 
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E

Endeavour

Mage
Dec 13, 2020
566
You've been back for a bit. You were supposedly close to her. She ctb. But you didn't even think to read her final post, see what happened, and instead said maybe she didn't? You don't know she made the news?

Come on, even after i said she died you didn't go and look.

Sketchy, bordering on worrying.

When I'd had a few weeks off and saw she'd gone it was the first thing I did because I knew she was a big part of the community, I wasn't even in contact with her. But I was shocked and wanted to know what happened because she seemed a really nice person.

You a few days later - haven't even looked?

I'm not accusing you of anything, just feels odd to me.

I won't be commenting on it any more. Sorry if I've mis-categorised you or something.

Take care.
 
Wayfaerer

Wayfaerer

JFMSUF
Aug 21, 2019
1,938
You've been back for a bit. You were supposedly close to her. She ctb. But you didn't even think to read her final post, see what happened, and instead said maybe she didn't? You don't know she made the news?

Come on, even after i said she died you didn't go and look.

Sketchy, bordering on worrying.

When I'd had a few weeks off and saw she'd gone it was the first thing I did because I knew she was a big part of the community, I wasn't even in contact with her. But I was shocked and wanted to know what happened because she seemed a really nice person.

You a few days later - haven't even looked?

I'm not accusing you of anything, just feels odd to me.

I won't be commenting on it any more. Sorry if I've mis-categorised you or something.

Take care.

I did look but nothing confirming her death on her profile. What's your prob?
 
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W’ren

W’ren

Worthless
Oct 28, 2020
557
Death by fire. As a descendent of witches i just can't go there.

Death by drowning. Although i have almost drowned twice.... Though in hindsight i should have let the undertow take me the first time, and not struggled against the bastard holding me under the second time.
 
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I

Initiated

Is life worth living?
Dec 5, 2020
66
Electrocution, self immolation, jumping. Electrucution and self immolation are extremely painful. Jumping leaves a horrifying mess. These methods aren't worth it. Besides, any method with lethality below 90 percent is too risky.

Hanging and fire arms are the best methods to CTB.
Hanging is something I'd be hesitant on trying. For one, I'd definitely get caught and end up brain dead in a wheelchair all my life. Secondly, the thought of me flopping around as I gasp for breath is mortifying. I also don't think I could jump off a tall building.
Hanging, when done correctly is quick and relatively painless.
 
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Mentalmick

Mentalmick

IMHOTEP!!!
Nov 30, 2020
2,049
Death by fire. As a descendent of witches i just can't go there.

Death by drowning. Although i have almost drowned twice.... Though in hindsight i should have let the undertow take me the first time, and not struggled against the bastard holding me under the second time.
Your a witch? I have sent the witch finder general a text. You're in for in now witch. You will be purified.
 
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J

JipJopMop

Member
Mar 6, 2021
96
Anything painful and messy, I am trying to avoid pain, not cause more of it.

If I got desperate enough I would consider anything though I guess but I'd prefer something quick and easy like shooting myself, taking n etc
 
L

Loser47

Student
Jan 14, 2021
130
I think I'll never be able to shoot myself also jumping on flat surface (maybe water I'll be able to do)
 
Mentalmick

Mentalmick

IMHOTEP!!!
Nov 30, 2020
2,049
I can't see myself ever sticking my head into a propeller.
 
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simpler-fy

simpler-fy

Member
Sep 15, 2020
10
Anything public. Buildings, Bridges, Trains, etc.
My suicide is not a big goddamned deal. I am not interested in causing great expense and inconvenience to others.
There need only be a firearm, and a forest.
 
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avoid_slow_death

avoid_slow_death

Ready to embrace the peaceful bliss of the void.
Feb 4, 2020
1,358
Self immolation, definitely. Probably the most horrible way to go. However, anything involving caustic chemicals also would be likely, if not more painful also, so no on those as well.
 
Taos

Taos

Student
Apr 19, 2021
119
Death by fire. As a descendent of witches i just can't go there.

Death by drowning. Although i have almost drowned twice.... Though in hindsight i should have let the undertow take me the first time, and not struggled against the bastard holding me under the second time.

What was drowning like?
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,602
Train for sure. It would just be an unpleasant way to go. The ones in my local area speed by really fast and it would have awful consequences if survived.
 
Moose.000

Moose.000

"Everything is meaningless" ~King Solomon
Apr 10, 2021
210
Fire, jumping or anything else that leaves more than a 10 second window of regret and results in a violent, gruesome death.
 
W’ren

W’ren

Worthless
Oct 28, 2020
557
What was drowning like?
Drowning was all panic and fight and confusion and feeling like my chest was going to burst. My lungs hurt and the air escaped and i needed to open my mouth to breathe but knew that if i did i was dead.
There was an instant, like a jolt of pins and needles, where i knew i was going to die *now* and i as i accepted that i stopped fighting him and gave in, and began to breathe in the water- and then i was out of the water somehow-

I can't exist through that terror again, and the water that i breathed in hurt like hell... It's not my way to go. I know my SI would kick in and i'd fight hard to swim and live-
 
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nightnightnitrite

nightnightnitrite

baby blues
Apr 17, 2021
483
Setting myself on fire(ouch and messy)
Drowning(always been my biggest fear)
Gun(messy and acquiring a gun is hard)
Train/Car crash(unfair to others)

Preferred method: hanging(tried once before-peaceful) and SN(have now might drink soon)
 
Toonloon

Toonloon

Experienced
Nov 17, 2020
253
Wrist cutting or any kind of bleeding out. I don't like being cold.

Setting self on fire. In case I survived I don't want to be disfigured horribly.
 
Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
21,378
Bojack Horseman successfully made me swear off jumping as a method, at least jumping while conscious. It's otherwise too scary to think about.
 
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J

Jack'sPain

Member
Jun 15, 2021
59
1. Jumping - heights are a no from me. I get sketched out standing on my apartment balcony :ahhha:
2. Gun - worried I'd mess it up somehow
3. Overdose on whatever pills - no guarantee to work and chance of long term problems if survived
4. Drowning - scared of what it feels like
What would you..?
 
L

LoveTakesManyForms

Student
Sep 9, 2021
175
Beaing stung by bull ants. Or maybe white room torture until I have a heart attack.
 
simpler-fy

simpler-fy

Member
Sep 15, 2020
10
Anything public where I traumatize someone or cause a huge disruption like jumping in front of a train or car.
 
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P

pseudoendotrizine

Member
Nov 14, 2021
5
I would never armed with a knife and charging towards US cops, which could then be found on some Youtube channels and enjoyed by millions.
 
Last edited:
S

Someone123

Illuminated
Oct 19, 2021
3,875
Partial hanging because it seems to almost never work, based on posts here, but it can leave marks on your neck that get you hospitalized.
 
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