Whereabouts Do You Plan to CTB?

[Celerity]

I scoped out some state/federal parks, so combo of public place and out in the middle of nowhere. I plan to leave a note with my coordinates so they don't find my rotting body days/weeks later. I would hate to see what FL does to a corpse.

 

[Foogs]

I want my body to properly decompose and return to the Earth, so middle of nowhere in a forest. Ideally I wanna be propped up against a tree so it sucks me up. I just hope the initial nitrogen surge doesn't kill the tree :/

 

[Celerity]

I want my body to properly decompose and return to the Earth, so middle of nowhere in a forest. Ideally I wanna be propped up against a tree so it sucks me up. I just hope the initial nitrogen surge doesn't kill the tree :/

Nice, and I hope it's gradual enough that it works. I wish I could be buried in that tree slushie/organic burial pod thing that's a concept at the moment.

The biodegradable burial pod that turns your body into a tree | CNN

A greener alternative to coffins, Capsula Mundi is an egg-shaped pod that feeds a tree planted above it as it breaks down.

www.cnn.com

What tree would you want to feed? I'd aim for Japanese Maple or a tree native to my area, the Longleaf Pine:




We have a ton here. My home borders a reserve. I love their fluffiness and irregular shapes. Honest to god one of the last remaining joys of living.

 

[Foogs]

Nice, and I hope it's gradual enough that it works. I wish I could be buried in that tree slushie/organic burial pod thing that's a concept at the moment.

The biodegradable burial pod that turns your body into a tree | CNN

A greener alternative to coffins, Capsula Mundi is an egg-shaped pod that feeds a tree planted above it as it breaks down.

www.cnn.com

What tree would you want to feed? I'd aim for Japanese Maple or a tree native to my area, the Longleaf Pine:

We have a ton here. My home borders a reserve. I love their fluffiness and irregular shapes. Honest to god one of the last remaining joys of living.

Same! It's expensive though IIRC and available who knows where

 

[Celerity]

Same! It's expensive though IIRC and available who knows where

But about that tree….you got any in mind? Enquiring minds would like to know.

 

[Foogs]

But about that tree….you got any in mind? Enquiring minds would like to know.

The tallest, thickest, oldest I can find

 

[ReadyForIt]

Definitely at home. My method is a firearm so I wouldn't wanna risk traumatizing anyone by doing it in a public place, plus I don't think I'd have the guts to do it in front of anyone else.

 

[Celerity]

The tallest, thickest, oldest I can find

The biodegradable burial pod that turns your body into a tree | CNN

A greener alternative to coffins, Capsula Mundi is an egg-shaped pod that feeds a tree planted above it as it breaks down.

www.cnn.com

A few of these might be worth a trip!

****I swear I'm not a spam bot. Just tipsy.

My money would be on the Alerce in the Andes or the Jomon Sugi in Japan.

 

[Foogs]

The biodegradable burial pod that turns your body into a tree | CNN

A greener alternative to coffins, Capsula Mundi is an egg-shaped pod that feeds a tree planted above it as it breaks down.

www.cnn.com

A few of these might be worth a trip!

****I swear I'm not a spam bot. Just tipsy.

My money would be on the Alerce in the Andes or the Jomon Sugi in Japan.

Traveling far isn't an option for me and I'm happy with whatever is local. Plus I need to not be found for up to 2 months for the process to work, so I really gotta be waaaaaaaaaaay out there

 

[Celerity]

Traveling far isn't an option for me and I'm happy with whatever is local. Plus I need to not be found for up to 2 months for the process to work, so I really gotta be waaaaaaaaaaay out there

2 months? What process are we talking about? Full decomposition?

 

[Foogs]

2 months? What process are we talking about? Full decomposition?

Yes

 

[Celerity]

Yes

Yeah, good point. Idk what would be a good spot. Maybe near that tree in the Andes but then you need something local. Maybe up high in a national park? If you don't mind me asking, why do you not want to be found?

 

[Weary Soul]

At home. I am a creature of habit I suppose and want to go somewhere I am very comfortable considering the gravity of my decision. I live alone so I do not have the worry that a family member will find my body.

Although, the thought of my body enriching the earth really appeals to me. : )

 

[Celerity]

At home. I am a creature of habit I suppose and want to go somewhere I am very comfortable considering the gravity of my decision. I live alone so I do not have the worry that a family member will find my body.

Although, the thought of my body enriching the earth really appeals to me. : )

I would CTB at home if it weren't for family. I may ultimately do that provided I have closed the lease and paid for everything. It's kind of ridiculous. Like I'd owe a landlord shit and as if it matters after I die.

Definitely at home. My method is a firearm so I wouldn't wanna risk traumatizing anyone by doing it in a public place, plus I don't think I'd have the guts to do it in front of anyone else.

I can respect that. I'm shooting myself in what we like to call Bum Fuck Egypt down here in FL. Still haven't settled 100% on a place, but I have some candidates.

 

[Weary Soul]

Yeah - if I had family who actually cared, I would probably go to a hotel or out into nature.

If they cared, I would not want to cause them any more potential pain, but they do not care, at all.

I hear you on the things that matter after one dies - you are sooo right.

Ultimately, the material things really do not matter and frankly, I don't care much anymore about material things. (I have had to work at this and still do to some extent).

All I want is peace - and preferably to live - but that is hard to do with absolutely no money and the hoops I have to go through with my government to get benefits because of my health. By the time I get approved, I suspect I will be long gone.

< 3

 

[Celerity]

Yeah - if I had family who actually cared, I would probably go to a hotel or out into nature.

If they cared, I would not want to cause them any more potential pain, but they do not care, at all.

I hear you on the things that matter after one dies - you are sooo right.

Ultimately, the material things really do not matter and frankly, I don't care much anymore about material things. (I have had to work at this and still do to some extent).

All I want is peace - and preferably to live - but that is hard to do with absolutely no money and the hoops I have to go through with my government to get benefits because of my health. By the time I get approved, I suspect I will be long gone.

< 3

Where are you located, if you don't mind me asking? I'm in FL.

 

[Weary Soul]

I don't mind you asking, I am in the northeast of the US. More than that, I am cautious about saying for safety reasons. : )

 

[Celerity]

I don't mind you asking, I am in the northeast of the US. More than that, I am cautious about saying for safety reasons. : )

Gotcha. Yeah, the US is a fucking shit hole. I wish you all the best. If you get Medicaid, be very cautious and double check which docs take it. A lot of the Medicaid lists include inpatient (resident hospital) services, which really makes a whole lot of shit confusing. As a patient in the hospital, Dr. Bob or Jen Smith could be covered but the minute you step outside the hospital, you're fucked.I schedule people's office visits with docs, and it's a constant problem.

 

[Weary Soul]

Yeah, I hear you. I have a condition that is supposed to be auto-approved for benefits from the government. And yet, here I am, still trying to jump though hoops to get help.

The other caveat - I really do not want to go into the system - once there (from what I have observed), your life is no longer your own. The government owns you and can dictate to you - not my cuppa.

I was able to get healthcare through the government, but I have been so traumatized by doctors, that I am extremely hesitant to go to one. I do not need inpatient, long-term care - I need some specific medicines.

The kicker?

I used to work in medicine and know exactly what meds I need, but the docs will not listen to me. I have severe, intermittent pain but because the gov't health care does not cover pain clinics I cannot get help for that.

As far as my other symptoms, I have to be very careful with any type of psych meds because I have had seizures from them - there are antiseizure meds that might help (not with all symptoms but with some), and yet my quack of a doc refuses to prescribe them because of their addiction potential.

I cannot, for the life of me (literally), figure out what they or he is thinking.

Yes - the US sucks in many, many ways.

 

[Celerity]

Yeah, I hear you. I have a condition that is supposed to be auto-approved for benefits from the government. And yet, here I am, still trying to jump though hoops to get help.

The other caveat - I really do not want to go into the system - once there (from what I have observed), your life is no longer your own. The government owns you and can dictate to you - not my cuppa.

I was able to get healthcare through the government, but I have been so traumatized by doctors, that I am extremely hesitant to go to one. I do not need inpatient, long-term care - I need some specific medicines.

The kicker?

I used to work in medicine and know exactly what meds I need, but the docs will not listen to me. I have severe, intermittent pain but because the gov't health care does not cover pain clinics I cannot get help for that.

As far as my other symptoms, I have to be very careful with any type of psych meds because I have had seizures from them - there are antiseizure meds that might help (not with all symptoms but with some), and yet my quack of a doc refuses to prescribe them because of their addiction potential.

I cannot, for the life of me (literally), figure out what they or he is thinking.

Yes - the US sucks in many, many ways.

Yeah, pain medicine is a clusterfuck. Huge stigma. Lots of regulation. A lot of people who legitimately need meds are treated like drug-seekers. I don't know what the answer is, but it's not this. The only positive thing I can say about our system is that your records don't always follow you completely for good and ill.

 

[Foogs]

Yeah, I hear you. I have a condition that is supposed to be auto-approved for benefits from the government. And yet, here I am, still trying to jump though hoops to get help.

The other caveat - I really do not want to go into the system - once there (from what I have observed), your life is no longer your own. The government owns you and can dictate to you - not my cuppa.

I was able to get healthcare through the government, but I have been so traumatized by doctors, that I am extremely hesitant to go to one. I do not need inpatient, long-term care - I need some specific medicines.

The kicker?

I used to work in medicine and know exactly what meds I need, but the docs will not listen to me. I have severe, intermittent pain but because the gov't health care does not cover pain clinics I cannot get help for that.

As far as my other symptoms, I have to be very careful with any type of psych meds because I have had seizures from them - there are antiseizure meds that might help (not with all symptoms but with some), and yet my quack of a doc refuses to prescribe them because of their addiction potential.

I cannot, for the life of me (literally), figure out what they or he is thinking.

Yes - the US sucks in many, many ways.

Are you using an attorney? Basically if you wanna get approved you need one. Many do it where if you're denied you owe them nothing, if you're approved they take 10-15% of the initial lump sum as payment

 

[Celerity]

Are you using an attorney? Basically if you wanna get approved you need one. Many do it where if you're denied you owe them nothing, if you're approved they take 10-15% of the initial lump sum as payment

That's some sad shit. Not arguing with you but damn. Who needing government assistance can afford that?

 

[Foogs]

That's some sad shit. Not arguing with you but damn. Who needing government assistance can afford that?

Well, everyone. It only costs if you win, and then instead of getting a 10k lump sum or whatever you get a 9k lump sum. It's not bad at all, doesn't affect your monthly benefit in any way

It's what I did, I highly recommend it! It also means no paperwork to fill out! Attorney does everything

 

[Celerity]

Well, everyone. It only costs if you win, and then instead of getting a 10k lump sum or whatever you get a 9k lump sum. It's not bad at all, doesn't affect your monthly benefit in any way

It's what I did, I highly recommend it! It also means no paperwork to fill out! Attorney does everything

Damn. Still sad though. Glad it worked for you. You shouldn't need a lawyer to get benefits. Our system is fucked. The fact that you need an overpriced bureaucrat to navigate our government is fucked.

 

[Weary Soul]

Are you using an attorney? Basically if you wanna get approved you need one. Many do it where if you're denied you owe them nothing, if you're approved they take 10-15% of the initial lump sum as payment

I am glad it worked for you.

I did consult an attorney, but was told I needed to apply twice and get turned down twice before I can get a lawyer involved.

In my area, depending on the amount you get in the initial lump sum, the lawyer gets either a 6k flat fee or up to 25% of what you do get - and this can be charged across your payments until the lawyer is paid.

It is a complete and utter farce as far as I am concerned. I am currently on round 2 and should have been (according to curret laws), approved on round 1. Four TBIs. Four. SMH (gently shaking my head, ha!).

This is why it typically takes about 2 years. Because of Covid, I still have a roof over my head, I was able to get healthcare, and help with paying for heat. I am past due on water and sewer though - more phone calls this week too try and get some kind of help there. I am not sure why I bother though. I am so very tired of all of this and what little money I have left will soon be gone. I may be able to sell some more gold, but I already sold most of it.

The funny thing about food stamps? Before Covid, you got 200$/month for food, and it ONLY covers cold food. It does not cover hot (or pre-cooked food), other necessities, dog food. It has since gone up I think (since Covid). But you still have to be very frugual with that 200$/month here - the cost of living where I am is outrageous.

Not only that, there is absolutely no aid if you have pets. So I have been sharing that $200/month in food with my dog (good thing I don't eat a lot). I was told I would probably have to surrender her - which would kill me, she is the only being in my life that loves me unconditionally.

Sighs, I know I will have to surrender her when my money runs out and have been searching for a good home for her. But because she is Rottie, it has been tough.

Thank you so much for providing the information. If you have any other ideas I would love to hear them.

And @Celerity, you are absolutely right. I don't even need chronic pain management. The pain I have hits out of nowhere, and all I can do is curl up into a little ball until the pain breaks (usually takes a week or two - but with pain meds it would take a day or two). After the pain breaks, it takes me about a week to get back to normal - it completely wipes me out. The thing is, it happens about every 2 months or so. So all I would need is pain management for about 5 days at most every 2 months or so. And I do not get addicted to pain meds - I actually do not like them. I hated morphine when I had my craniotomy.

The insomnia is a whole other beast.

The US is so extreme sometimes - where is the common sense?

 

[FuneralCry]

I will probably end up ctb in my house at a time when family members are not around. I haven't really planned it all out yet really. However in an ideal world, I would like to do it somewhere isolated in nature.

 

[Johnjohn1]

Where are you located, if you don't mind me asking? I'm in FL.

I am in Naples

 

[Celerity]

I am in Naples

Naples, FL?

 

[Bedrock48]

Since I'll likely be using CO and don't want to accidentally kill people in the adjoining flats I'll be doing it out in nature. Just off a nature walk area but as people wild camp there I doubt I'll draw much attention.

It also overlooks the sea which is nice since I'd love to die on a beach but without n or sn that'd be tricky to accomplish.

 

[sadbadpsychogirl]

with any luck, in a lounge chair under a lilac tree on a beautiful day