When they don't think about you at all

[derpyderpins]

Say someone hurt you, wronged you, abused you, etc., and it's sticking with you. You will keep thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and it changes your behavior.

They moved on immediately. They don't regret. They have no guilt.

Say you care for someone who's indifferent to you. You think about them, wonder how they're doing, wonder who and what they're thinking about, and it hurts to know they don't think about you, and it changes your behavior.

They don't hurt, at least not for that reason. They're probably unaware it's an issue.

It sucks to be insignificant.

 

[foreverfalling]

I suffer from this, having the abuse constantly float in my head everyday. Lately I've been trying to separate the experience of hurt and abuse from the person that caused it. The experience will stick in my head and as you say, change my behaviour. But thinking about the person behind it causes suffering, makes the ego feel diminished, makes me want to get back at them. I imagine that the abuse could have been caused by anyone, not that particular person. That way I accept how the experience has changed me, learn from it, but minimise unproductive emotions like anger from building up. I remove my attachments to that person, whether they be positive such as care, or negative such as resentment, and treat them like an NPC. Build and cultivate that same indifference towards that person.

 

[AbusedInnocent]

The axe forgets but the tree remembers.

 

[eatantz]

He wronged us but now he's acting like the biggest victim in the world and gets sympathy for it, its so frustrating. I hate feeling like this

 

[theboy]

true. Is dark

 

[Havnis]

You will keep thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and it changes your behavior

Yeah and they call it survival instinct "learn to protect us next time"

it hurts to know they don't think about you, and it changes your behavior.

Not necessarily, if the love is unconditional or you prefer to love than to be loved, you would enjoy thinking about them even tho they don't care.