Sleeper System

Sleeper System

Z z Z z Z z Z z Z z Z
May 5, 2022
766
Yeah I mean i think the best way is just to dumb yourself down and try to live in ignorance is bliss. I've been to many ideas and theories but I feel they're just making things worse in the end
Sometimes I kind of wish I was retarded or demented
As much as I curse my ability to understand the world for what it is... it's just one byproduct of the many that intelligence brings.
I like having common sense and being some what capable. Life would be harder being blissfully ignorant. Things would happen
and you wouldn't understand it because just being dumb doesn't stop bad things from happening in life in general. Imagine being dumb and
going through an eviction. Like... the fear of not understanding would be unfathomable to me.
 
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Shimidori

Shimidori

make me sad
Dec 22, 2023
39
I think it was how I first saw death, back when I was a kid: to see my grandfather die before me.

I remember not even crying back then, even when I was feeling sad about it. It would take me a very long time to understand it properly, mainly discovering more about his rough life, but when I did, I would think back to his expression as he died: that of peace. For the first time in nearly 50 years, he was something close to happy, and it took embracing death to achieve it.

If I ever die, whether by natural causes or my own hand, I will remember that expression, and try to be like him.
 
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Sleeper System

Sleeper System

Z z Z z Z z Z z Z z Z
May 5, 2022
766
I think it was how I first saw death, back when I was a kid: to see my grandfather die before me.

I remember not even crying back then, even when I was feeling sad about it. It would take me a very long time to understand it properly, mainly discovering more about his rough life, but when I did, I would think back to his expression as he died: that of peace. For the first time in nearly 50 years, he was something close to happy, and it took embracing death to achieve it.

If I ever die, whether by natural causes or my own hand, I will remember that expression, and try to be like him.

That's a beautiful prospective. Thank you for sharing it.
 
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MatrixPrisoner

MatrixPrisoner

Enlightened
Jul 8, 2023
1,628
The things that make me want to ctb are not so romantic.
The loneliness.
The economy.
The future.
My loved ones.
Housing.
Job.
Etc.

But like @MatrixPrisoner implied... how unfair the world seems to be. A lot of it is just luck of the draw and my luck sucks. So yeah.
I would consider it more of the downfall of society than anything associated with fairness or lack thereof. It's fair I suppose. That girl came from nothing, so I can only imagine that any one of us had just as much of a chance at that kind of luck as she did. It just irks me that the same country that is complaining about barely being able afford groceries and rent is the same country that just gave Taylor Swift a billion dollars, numerous pro athletes $40+ million dollars, a couple of completely worthless TikTok dancers and vile pieces of shit like the Paul brothers ten of millions of dollars last year. Drinking up the Brawndo posion they market as Prime Energy Drink.

Meanwhile, school ratings for counties all over the nation are mostly Ds and Fs. I'm not hating....or maybe I am. All I know is that my mind cannot grasp it and I don't see the point of living in an Idiocracy like this. Every year when I have to mail in a sizeable tax coupon to Uncle Sam, it's all I can think of and it makes my blood boil because I work my ass off. Shoot me now. Or give Japanese citizenship. The rest of the world is a landfill.

1703557643371
 
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NoOneLovesMiMi

NoOneLovesMiMi

Just Me
May 27, 2023
114
Im curious what make people become obsessed with death preferably without saying how its a natural thing
I watched 2 documentaries on YouTube.
One was about a 24 year old woman in Belgium who was ready to die.
It's called 24 and ready to die.
I was so in awe how the conversation about her life..what she tried...and what she didn't want was so natural.
Like they were talking about the weather.
She wasn't judged or lectured. She was supported.
The second one really touched me. It's a Aeon video titled A father stands by his daughter's choice to die Letting You Go.
Her father supported and comforted his daughter decision to die.
Could you imagine telling a parent...love or friend how you feel. And despite them not understanding or wanting to let go of you but love you so much they help you and enjoy their time with you.
Get to say goodbye.
I bet alot of people would actually keep trying knowing that if it really just gets to be too much they have this option.
After I saw those I realized suicide is just death. It's hard to understand choosing death because life is such a gift...right.
But a gift for who.
We all don't handle life the same and I think it's beautiful and humane to give the gift of death for those who know they can no longer live life.
 
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pthnrdnojvsc

pthnrdnojvsc

Extreme Pain is much worse than people know
Aug 12, 2019
2,737
When I understood that Death is non-existence forever . We've all experienced non-existence for 13.8 billion years all the time before I was born. All those billions of years I had no problems never suffered never felt any pain never had a need for anything nor worry, no old age no diseases none of 1000's of horrible things in life or this evil world. The big problems began for me when I was born, birthed into this evil world as an always hungry decaying fragile small animal always under the threat of extreme torture .... a small animal that can suffer unbearable constant pain

vladimir-nabokov-quote-lbr3y7r.jpg


quote-i-do-not-fear-death-i-had-been-dead-for-billions-and-billions-of-years-before-i-was-mark-twain-35-8-0825.jpg
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
9,829
At age 10, it seemed more preferable to living! I also sort of admired suicide as a choice in some TV series. The BBC series I Cladius- Claudius' mother and an episode of Bergerac where someone was paralysed and wanted to die. I just thought- fair enough really.

Plus, I've had family members suffer a great deal before they died. It was a release to them.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,878
In my case I've always felt comforted by the thought of ceasing to exist, as soon as I became aware of what death was. No matter what I'll see it as preferable to die, I see eternally ceasing to exist as the best outcome next to never existing at all, as after all one cannot suffer from the absence of everything.

For me ceasing to exist is the way to find peace from all unnecessary suffering in this undesirable existence there was never a need for. It disturbs me how there is no limit as to how much one can suffer as long as they exist in this hellish world which is why I certainly see death as a relief.

For me existence is the problem and I see death as the solution, all that's ideal to me is a dreamless and eternal sleep where all is forgotten about. I see death as something positive as I very strongly believe death to just be the absence of everything, death means freedom from the burden that is existing.
 
M30W

M30W

The bus is late?
Dec 7, 2023
29
I watched 2 documentaries on YouTube.
One was about a 24 year old woman in Belgium who was ready to die.
It's called 24 and ready to die.
I was so in awe how the conversation about her life..what she tried...and what she didn't want was so natural.
Like they were talking about the weather.
She wasn't judged or lectured. She was supported.
The second one really touched me. It's a Aeon video titled A father stands by his daughter's choice to die Letting You Go.
Her father supported and comforted his daughter decision to die.
Could you imagine telling a parent...love or friend how you feel. And despite them not understanding or wanting to let go of you but love you so much they help you and enjoy their time with you.
Get to say goodbye.
I bet alot of people would actually keep trying knowing that if it really just gets to be too much they have this option.
After I saw those I realized suicide is just death. It's hard to understand choosing death because life is such a gift...right.
But a gift for who.
We all don't handle life the same and I think it's beautiful and humane to give the gift of death for those who know they can no longer live life.
I love this so much and will definitely check out those videos. :heart:🙌
 
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Slow_Farewell

Slow_Farewell

Warlock
Dec 19, 2023
709
When I removed the emotions out of it and tried to look at things from as near pure-logic as I could.
So from a math's perspective? i guess. Like cost of continuing living vs cost of CTB. Death became more of a welcome ending when I crunched the numbers, kinda like the feeling of paying off a loan.
 
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isthisit?

isthisit?

The name's Cedrik
Jun 23, 2023
137
I think I became comfrotable and understanding of death when I started questioning god. Then that spiraled (with some other factors) into me becoming suicidal.
 
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f1f7y8yoL053r

f1f7y8yoL053r

Member
Nov 14, 2023
21
I became comfortable with death when I almost drowned at age 10. I panicked at first, kept trying to reach the surface of the lake but always sank. Got so tired. Then suddenly I felt calm, I faced death and accepted it. I told myself I'd try one last time and if someone didn't pull me out I was done. So tired.
So tired.
I used all the rest of my strength, got to the surface, and as soon as my hand came up out of the water, someone grabbed my wrist, pulled me out.
Now I regret it. I think I was supposed to die then. Would've been better off.
 
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O

outrider567

Visionary
Apr 5, 2022
2,591
Death is not a 'good thing', its the only thing--Seeing Patti in the hospital dying before my eyes made me realize that right away, no reason for me to survive in this world anymore
 
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ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
5,177
I liked the idea of death ever since I was young and this is because I believe that death is just permanent non existence and this has always been peaceful to me. No responsibilities, no thoughts, no emotions.. just nothing and pure ignorance. And that's what makes me like the idea of death so much. It's impossible for me to suffer being dead but it's guaranteed for me to suffer being alive. I never liked living
As much as I curse my ability to understand the world for what it is... it's just one byproduct of the many that intelligence brings.
I like having common sense and being some what capable. Life would be harder being blissfully ignorant. Things would happen
and you wouldn't understand it because just being dumb doesn't stop bad things from happening in life in general. Imagine being dumb and
going through an eviction. Like... the fear of not understanding would be unfathomable to me.
I agree with you. I know the world is cruel but, beyond that, I lack the common sense and intelligence to be capable. When you used eviction as an analogy here, I got spooked as that sounds exactly like what I would do in that situation
 
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L

luciole

Member
Dec 28, 2023
26
I have always wanted to leave but my suffering has lasted so long that I am starting to become more and more comfortable with death. I just need to master the instinct for survival.
 
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O

outrider567

Visionary
Apr 5, 2022
2,591
Death is not a 'good thing', its the only thing--Seeing Patti in the hospital dying before my eyes made me realize that right away, no reason for me to live or survive in this world anymore
 
Necrosis

Necrosis

En bokstavelig bjørn som later som om han er menne
Feb 23, 2023
69
I was comfortable with it from a young age because I was born with health problems that were kept private but my family helped me work through it. I guess even had a lot of time to develop a fear of it because I had adults comforting me before I had fully comprehended it. I grew more angry about it as a young adult but after studying my religion more the anger settled. I have been both actively and passively suicidal bu between those moments I've still been comfortable with it.
 
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M30W

M30W

The bus is late?
Dec 7, 2023
29
When I removed the emotions out of it and tried to look at things from as near pure-logic as I could.
So from a math's perspective? i guess. Like cost of continuing living vs cost of CTB. Death became more of a welcome ending when I crunched the numbers, kinda like the feeling of paying off a loan.
oooo I see. I sometimes wish I could just separate the feelings as well, I"m glad to see that people actually think like that. It gives hope to also think like people like you.
I think I became comfrotable and understanding of death when I started questioning god. Then that spiraled (with some other factors) into me becoming suicidal.
oh yea that can tend to be where it all starts is the questioning of god :\. But in a way im happy to see people not uncomfortable with something that's supposed to be natural. thank you for sharing!
I became comfortable with death when I almost drowned at age 10. I panicked at first, kept trying to reach the surface of the lake but always sank. Got so tired. Then suddenly I felt calm, I faced death and accepted it. I told myself I'd try one last time and if someone didn't pull me out I was done. So tired.
So tired.
I used all the rest of my strength, got to the surface, and as soon as my hand came up out of the water, someone grabbed my wrist, pulled me out.
Now I regret it. I think I was supposed to die then. Would've been better off.
wow I remember I had a bad experience with water once (I got trapped under water) and seeing this I guess I did face death. Im glad to see you not uncomfortable. I hope you know you were pulled out for a reason and hope you keep looking and understanding all your options! :)
 
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