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Gray Wounds

Gray Wounds

A Phantasmagoria
Jun 27, 2018
575
If you are given a chance to recover, what would you want to enjoy to do, become, or accomplish?

I want to pursue my writing career to the fullest and without much intervention. And also I want to get myself a proper violin teacher and improve my playing. Perhaps, I will be a teacher too.




.... All but wishful thinking, I know. There's no turning back from what I am now. But this thought just struck me lately.
 
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T

typx

Specialist
May 4, 2018
381
During my last two gasps for air I wrote pretty furiously and I really enjoyed the process. It's one of the few things that I really enjoyed.
 
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Gray Wounds

Gray Wounds

A Phantasmagoria
Jun 27, 2018
575
ooof i'd so like to reply to this thread but i'm afraid that if anyone's been stalking me and extracting info from all my posts they'd very easily figure out who i am, so i'll say: astronaut and professional dildo-maker

@Gray Wounds , are you already a writer?

astronaut's cool while prof-dildo maker entertains the very human nature, incongruous yet bloody hell, it's kinky which is fun
 
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Gray Wounds

Gray Wounds

A Phantasmagoria
Jun 27, 2018
575
ooof i'd so like to reply to this thread but i'm afraid that if anyone's been stalking me and extracting info from all my posts they'd very easily figure out who i am, so i'll say: astronaut and professional dildo-maker

@Gray Wounds , are you already a writer?

Yeah. I'm a writer and an author of several articles and a novel.
 
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T

typx

Specialist
May 4, 2018
381
Sometimes I daydream about another world where things went differently. I know it's pathetic but it helps me feel a little more sane. Like maybe whatever potential I had existed no matter how things turned out. That there was a time when things could have gone forward to a good life. Maybe that possibility lives on somewhere else.
 
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Gray Wounds

Gray Wounds

A Phantasmagoria
Jun 27, 2018
575
During my last two gasps for air I wrote pretty furiously and I really enjoyed the process. It's one of the few things that I really enjoyed.

i'm glad you enjoy doing it too.
 
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Gray Wounds

Gray Wounds

A Phantasmagoria
Jun 27, 2018
575
Sometimes I daydream about another world where things went differently. I know it's pathetic but it helps me feel a little more sane. Like maybe whatever potential I had existed no matter how things turned out. That there was a time when things could have gone forward to a good life. Maybe that possibility lives on somewhere else.

possibilities are endless, and I agree on that.
 
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Gray Wounds

Gray Wounds

A Phantasmagoria
Jun 27, 2018
575
Sometimes I daydream about another world where things went differently. I know it's pathetic but it helps me feel a little more sane. Like maybe whatever potential I had existed no matter how things turned out. That there was a time when things could have gone forward to a good life. Maybe that possibility lives on somewhere else.

i guess it's the least that we can do, daydream i mean
 
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T

typx

Specialist
May 4, 2018
381
i'm glad you enjoy doing it too.

There was a lot of satisfaction in creating something out of nothing. I saved all of it to a USB and I'm planning on putting in a binder of other stuff I wrote. So when I go the only things I really ever did even half-assed well can go to someone that was close to me.

I had a paper published once. That was a pretty cool feeling. I lectured in a psychology 200 class once as well. That was a good time.
 
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Gray Wounds

Gray Wounds

A Phantasmagoria
Jun 27, 2018
575
There was a lot of satisfaction in creating something out of nothing. I saved all of it to a USB and I'm planning on putting in a binder of other stuff I wrote. So when I go the only things I really ever did even half-assed well can go to someone that was close to me.

I had a paper published once. That was a pretty cool feeling. I lectured in a psychology 200 class once as well. That was a good time.

that's so nice to hear. i really know how that feels but I do not know to what amount in your case.
It is indeed an uplifting feeling to publish. With all the hard works and coffees... it's like having an award.
 
T

Tiburcio

Guest
Fortunately all my wishes were destroyed long time ago. They were a scourge, forcing me to fight this lost war.
 
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BurningLights

BurningLights

He killed himself with his own mind
Jul 2, 2018
709
I would have like to progress further with photography, even making some kind of money from it would have been nice, but even going out with my camera seems pointless these days, I wish I had the enjoyment back that I used to get.
 
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M

Maggotymaggots

Member
Apr 18, 2018
54
I had (I mean, still have, I suppose) some artistic ability. Not anything to write home about, but maybe in some fantasy land I could've done something relating to that.

I could spend all day dwelling on impossible what-ifs. It doesn't do me any good.
 
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agreement

agreement

Mage
Mar 26, 2018
544
Sometimes I daydream about another world where things went differently. I know it's pathetic but it helps me feel a little more sane. Like maybe whatever potential I had existed no matter how things turned out. That there was a time when things could have gone forward to a good life. Maybe that possibility lives on somewhere else.
I "believe" in the multiverse theory and so on, so I think sometimes that there's somewhere another me that have been a little bit more lucky and smart than me.
 
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agreement

agreement

Mage
Mar 26, 2018
544
Reading more books

Know all the things \o/
 
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D

Deleted_9cKnXB34QG

Mage
Jun 26, 2018
501
If I didn't have crippling anxiety and wasn't physically and mentally retarded and my outlook on life and working was different I'd love to be a truck driver. Or a bus driver but dealing with people kinda sucks.

Yeah, I'm not very talented or ambitious xD
 
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T

typx

Specialist
May 4, 2018
381
I always wanted to be a counsellor or a therapist. Maybe a teacher. I was in school for a BSW a lifetime ago.. but just kept on fucking up. That.. plus I'm a miserable asshole and was just better at hiding it when I was young. I can remember when I was pursuing the BSW.. secretly knowing in the back of my head I couldn't do it.
 
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D

Deleted member 847

Guest
Absolutely nothing. Winning at life is just a form of escapism and delaying the inevitable which is that everything you represent here has no real importance because your meaty body is gonna die.
0512fdf525b8584690804109ef9e1f90b38c95-wm.jpg
 
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M

Morning Angel

Useless Broken Wings
Aug 8, 2018
618
Before my life was ruined I wanted to be in academia. My fantasy job was always a private investigator though.
 
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stellabelle

stellabelle

ethereal
Dec 14, 2018
3,919
Sadly, I don't think there is recovery.

If there was a perfect world, I guess I'd just want a profession that paid well and didn't make me hate life and every aspect of it.
 
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W

Walilamdzi

.
Mar 21, 2019
1,700
Self-sufficiency and stability doing something worthwhile.
 
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Orin

Orin

Experienced
Apr 16, 2019
253
to become a Buddhist monk

or

to be involved with a group of people who are dedicated to figuring out how to transform our world into a utopia or near-utopia, or at least a world where extreme forms of suffering are absent... a world where no one will ever wish for or consider ctb.
 
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Midnight

Midnight

Beyond solace
Jun 30, 2018
624
Nothing anymore ... It's been too long in a state of mind like this. I used to have dreams but now these seem stupid and futile/joyless.
 
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Scribble Fan

Scribble Fan

I'm out!
May 30, 2019
815
A composer, writing music for whatever comes my way, but at the same time having a good degree of choice and freedom to express.

Either that or maybe an author, I used to enjoy writing when I was younger.
 
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F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
I don't know. I never had dreams or goals lol!
 
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H

H2H2

Specialist
May 31, 2019
320
Its too late for me .

In another life, I would have loved a leaving after breakfast-coming back to supper job helping people in a rural environment or a low competitive small urban landscape, wife, kids, home, free weekends for family and community life, holidays once a year.
 
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F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
Its too late for me .

In another life, I would have loved a leaving after breakfast-coming back to supper job helping people in a rural environment or a low competitive small urban landscape, wife, kids, home, free weekends for family and community life, holidays once a year.
Sounds lovely :)
 
H

H2H2

Specialist
May 31, 2019
320
Sounds lovely :)
Yes it does !

I lost my life to asp. I have no life experiences to account for. I spent all my time faking I enjoyed other peoples hobbies and learning sports in an attemp to socialize. Never had a relationship because I cant connect emotionally on the same level as everyone else and I panic with intimacy. I always was physically healthy and fit with a slight depression until last year when my health worsened. Leaving behind something resembling that life would have meant a lot to me .
 
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azucaramargo

azucaramargo

Enlightened
Sep 16, 2018
1,010
If you are given a chance to recover, what would you want to enjoy to do, become, or accomplish?

I want to pursue my writing career to the fullest and without much intervention. And also I want to get myself a proper violin teacher and improve my playing. Perhaps, I will be a teacher too.




.... All but wishful thinking, I know. There's no turning back from what I am now. But this thought just struck me lately.
Gray Wounds, this sounds so do-able! And, I think it's great you are thinking like this. I wish I could get myself to think like you...constructively, not escaping into flights of fancy and online geography quizzes to numb myself. Thank you for posting this question. I would like to get a "businessy" job that pays a certain amount of money. That would make me feel awesome. :) Please don't give up on your goal. I don't know in which country you're living, but if you're interested in substitute teaching in the U.S., I can recommend a pretty good company with which to do that.
 
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