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O

Onomotopoeia

Experienced
Feb 8, 2019
264
Oddly, that is my last resort and I am trying it out now via shroom microdosing.

Only 2 so far so probably to early to tell but I do think my pain is less than normal and my anxiety may have even dropped a level.

I'm giving it some time yet before truly deciding. Yesterday was a little rough.
 
lookingtoendit

lookingtoendit

Member
Oct 4, 2020
28
Oddly, that is my last resort and I am trying it out now via shroom microdosing.

Only 2 so far so probably to early to tell but I do think my pain is less than normal and my anxiety may have even dropped a level.

I'm giving it some time yet before truly deciding. Yesterday was a little rough.

Interesting. I hope it goes well for you.
Why did you opt for microdosing, if you don't mind me asking?
 
M

madbananas

Wizard
Apr 29, 2020
620
I've tried my last resort. Now I'm just using vices (legal ones - food, alcohol, cigarettes) to keep myself going until a miracle happens (either something changes or I find the ability to ctb). I actually experienced the ego death I think you are referring to but I experienced it after a significant traumatic event rather than from psychedelics. It just felt like my whole mind reset and it was like I was just at one with myself and the environment. I could still experience emotions, but I felt like my window of tolerance swung back open to a pre-traumatised state. It wasn't a euphoric experience, but it was a liberating, neutral one. No anxiety about the future because the moment was all that I focused on. During this time I even started having ESP-like experiences as well, one example being having a song in my head all day and then that song being the first to play in my YouTube mix (which is random each time and has 100's of songs) and I'd literally never searched for that song before. I didn't even know the name of it.
Sadly this free mindset didn't last, only for about 2-4weeks, can't say exactly as it felt like it came back slowly but really fast at the same time. This was just earlier this year and I haven't experienced it since. This experience has however shown to be that I am in fact a significantly traumatised individual, and now I have more compassion for myself in that department.
 
E

enter.the.void

Member
Jul 14, 2020
23
Same. I have still some DMT left, but still have not the courage to consume it because its so unpredictable and deeply mind-altering and spiritual. But i have promised myself i should try at least one last time DMT, before i ctb - maybe it can show me a way out before its to late.
 
O

Onomotopoeia

Experienced
Feb 8, 2019
264
Interesting. I hope it goes well for you.
Why did you opt for microdosing, if you don't mind me asking?

a few reasons.

1. I have no friends and am flying solo, the idea of having a bad trip alone terrifies me. I used to do shrooms when I could but I was young and brazen and now i'm an older coward.
2. starting low and easing up let's me experiment with what a safe macrodose would be should i decide to try that (and I expect I will)
3. There's lots of info out there about micro dosing and it's more studied than macro dosing, because typically that's just chasing a high (which can be great in itself) but i'm looking for a long term solution and shrooms are not easy to find.
 
bov

bov

Arcanist
Aug 26, 2020
405
Same. I have still some DMT left, but still have not the courage to consume it because its so unpredictable and deeply mind-altering and spiritual. But i have promised myself i should try at least one last time DMT, before i ctb - maybe it can show me a way out before its to late.
I don't have experience with it but I think you should try it.
say you've tried everything to feel better - what's your last resort?
Mine would be to take hallucinogenics, for the potential 'enlightenment'.
What's stopping you?
 
Last edited:
Gnip

Gnip

Bill the Cat
Oct 10, 2020
621
I might collect all the old capsules of fluoxetine I have stored up, maybe as much as 250,000 mg (possibly more), and blast my brain with it to discover if all those positive OD CTB attempt outcomes apply to me. I just don't know however. My serotonin receptors may be destroyed or shot at this stage, as indicated by my complete lack of withdrawal symptoms to some extremely powerful addictive high dose prescription medications.
 

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