I truly believe the field of mental health simply attracts a lot of idiots and a lot of mentally ill people; for the latter, it is almost always a way for the individual to project their own experience onto others, and if you are someone who does not evoke the ability to do that, they don't have much interest. It is SO difficult to find a legitimate therapist or psychiatrist who is actually well versed in the theory and practical application of real "therapy" and up to date scientific literature. So many push their views on religion/spirituality and politics onto you, which is always such a red flag.
So many still completely preach the chemical imbalance model of mental illness despite having been replaced by any legitimate professional in the field by the neuroplasticity model. The vast majority of therapists just want to be your venting buddy, and offer no advice that actually requires a degree in the field.
The last mental health professional who I spoke to (did not have a session with), literally told me in this ridiculously compassionate but condescending way (as if she was speaking to a child) that "sometimes we all just need someone to talk to and vent to, so we can get it out and realize that everyone has these problems and that it's not that bad." And I just smiled at her and said "yeah you're right." By the way, all I had told her by this point, was that I wanted to be put on an SSRI, not a single other thing. All she did was see was that I was younger than her, maybe that is why she completely dismissed my issues? - I couldn't have been younger than 26 when this happened (I'm 28 now). She had my medical records, and if she had even glanced at them, she would have realized that I have a significant history of mental illness, institutionalization, and psychiatric medication.
She even asked (probably just out of legal obligation) if I was suicidal. And I just straight up said yes, that I was, and she immediately responded with a kind smile and said "yes, but nothing actually serious, right?" to which I then said "I guess not..." and we instantly, and I mean instantly, moved on. I gave short answers because I was so uncomfortable being outside in the first place at that time (I was extremely agoraphobic for several years), and when she responded this way it just shot down my ability to communicate.
This is not indicative of all therapists, but it is extremely difficult to find someone who can actually help you and who you respect. There is SO much trial and error, and everyone just casually says "yes, that's normal! you have to look around and see many therapists to find the right match... and by the way, you should give each one multiple sessions to see how it goes before you decide." WHO HAS THE FUCKING MONEY FOR THAT? WHO HAS THE TIME. WHO HAS THE MENTAL CAPACITY WHEN I BARELY CAN FUCKING GET OUT OF BED? It's like they decided to put 1000 road blocks in the way of getting help for the exact type of people who cannot handle those road blocks. I am still keeping hope that one day I will attempt to get a good mental health professional, but doing it is soooooo disheartening and expensive.
My experience with benzos has been good for anxiety, but I'm an addict so we are inherently incompatible. My experience with SSRIs has been that they don't help with my depression, but make me gain weight and lose all my libido. Things like tricyclic antidepressants have done absolutely nothing.
