Discussion what was the lowest point of your life?

[slitwristsbleedcold]

the moment, where you hit rock bottom, full despair, what was it, and how did it happen? please describe the full story

 

[itsgone2]

Now. This time period. Without too many details I've just made too many mistakes in life. So many poor choices and now in a spot where ctb honestly looks like the best option to me. But I'm being a coward about it. SI too strong for me right now. I wish for a way out of this.

 

[death over slavery]

When my ex broke up.

She was like a part of me, like the other half of myself. There was a darker part of myself who hates the world and everyone else. But that thought wasn't strong enough since she always reminded me to be kind and see the good things about the world. Now that she's gone, and those dark and nihilistic thoughts had consumed and ruled over my body, which are made worse by my poor mental conditions.

On a positive note, with her gone, I have nothing to lose and I can commit to CTB without worry of others' reactions. I don't blame her for ending it; it is what is is

 

[whybother2002]

Now. This time period. Without too many details I've just made too many mistakes in life. So many poor choices and now in a spot where ctb honestly looks like the best option to me. But I'm being a coward about it. SI too strong for me right now. I wish for a way out of this.

Now for me as well :-(

 

[Spite]

When my father disowned me and told me to my face that I should kill myself, in 2022.

 

[trist]

two months ago, when i got a call saying that my best friend ctb'ed

 

[TwistedNightmares]

When my mom's ex boyfriend was constantly being horrible to me and my mom always took his side. I escaped to grandma's house a lot as a result. One day I needed to go to grandma's house for that very same reason. She escorted me that day and we took the train. She wouldn't stop abusing me while we were travelling. She was loud too. Everyone just stared, no one stepped in to try and stop the abuse. I couldn't stop crying for days once I arrived at grandma's place and mom left to go back home. That was my lowest.

 

[DeusVult]

When I was living with an abuser, and couldn't leave, and couldn't get rid of him either. I was living in terror all day, for over a year, he would hurt me all the time, psychologically torture me for fun. That's when I almost killed myself. I'm doing okay now.

 

[woodlandcreature]

Now. Every year is worse but right now is significantly worse than it's ever been. There's a lot of reasons why. Too many to count or fully get into. A culmination of my whole life, really. Everything connects. Things will only get worse, and I don't want to be around when that happens.

 

[Redhead712]

Today, at least until tomorrow.

 

[Irisse]

The first year of University, at 18/19. Before I transferred to the programme I actually wanted, my parents forced me to go to a really bad programme where one professor disliked me for no reason and kept insulting me. At the same time I was dealing with the fact that one of my childhood friends was acting incredibly creepy towards me and he ended up siding with my abusers. All while my parents did nothing to stop the abuse and forced me to attend a programme that I hated and that can't even provide a secure job because of some administrative issues. I wouldn't wish that year on my worst enemy.

 

[qewpie]

now and for the rest of my life bc i literally have a balance disorder that makes me feel like i'm going downhill. like it's so hilarious that the fact i can never win is now permanently part of my biology

 

[joey2424]

Now. Every year is worse but right now is significantly worse than it's ever been. There's a lot of reasons why. Too many to count or fully get into. A culmination of my whole life, really. Everything connects. Things will only get worse, and I don't want to be around when that happens.

I feel this way too. I'm afraid to have to face how my reality would look if I had to continue this life.

 

[slitwristsbleedcold]

two months ago, when i got a call saying that my best friend ctb'ed

I've had something similar happen to me as well, I understand you, the pain is unbearable, I'm sorry to hear, wish you the best

 

[TheUncommon]

September 1st to now, so far

 

[FadingSnowFake]

Love of my love decided to leave, dumped the news on me after planning everything, without talking to me. He was depressed and suicidal, and chose to start over in a new country after three years of me being there for him as best I could. The only thing I could do was to give up everything and move to another continent as well, because I couldn't stay in a world without him.

Last year November, just before we both left to separate countries, I broke down and became suicidal. Not a day has gone by without me thinking about dying, same as he used to feel before. Thing is, just before we left, we both realised how very deep our love is, and we promised to remain in contact and hope on a future.

It's been a year of pure hell, and I've been dreading this November, the anniversary of my lowest point. Last year, I couldn't get SN in time before leaving. Although I've started a new life with a new job in a new country, I now have my SN. I still have contact with my person, we chat almost every day and support each other. But this week he told me he doesn't see us getting together again, at least for another year.

I don't know what's going to happen, I don't want to give up hoping, and I know he needs me too, but the hell is still very much real, and we are continents apart.