What methods do you use for self-soothing?

[Depressed&Stressed]

What are things that you guys to self-soothe during panic attacks? I suffer really hard from a lot of complex relationship trauma and right now my support system looks like Swiss cheese because one person leaving me set off a really bad attack and I got vicious to the people around me and they chose to dip too. I'm calmer now but very alone and very hurt and frustrated with myself. I'm trying to self-soothe but one of the huge reasons I'm in so much trouble and I struggle so hard is that all the methods I've tried will only work temporarily (if they work at all). Video games, journaling, watching YouTube, watching really good shows, reading books, listening to audioboks, sleeping, smoking weed, grounding exercises, ice cubes, etc aren't really working anymore. The things that soothe me, for the most part, are companionship and conversation.

A therapist friend of mine (not my therapist) told me about some studies that have shown that the parts of your brain that light up when you're writing are the same parts of your brain that light up when you're interacting with someone. I've kind of been simulating friendship and conversation by watching really friendly YouTubers (Doctor Mike, you've been a genuine life saver) and writing my thoughts and commentary similar to the way I'd talk to someone while watching someone. It does definitely help, but only so much. What do you guys do?

 

[trying ungracefully]

Breathing and focusing on the things around me helps with bad panic attacks. I try to breath as deep and slow as I can and my therapist told me to look around my room and recognize my surroundings to realize I'm safe. Only time it didn't work was when I was in the ER freaking out and not wanting to be hospitalized lol.

 

[Depressed&Stressed]

Breathing and focusing on the things around me helps with bad panic attacks. I try to breath as deep and slow as I can and my therapist told me to look around my room and recognize my surroundings to realize I'm safe. Only time it didn't work was when I was in the ER freaking out and not wanting to be hospitalized lol.

Man I'm sorry about the ER attack

 

[-Link-]

If it meets a certain severity, the only thing that brings me down from it is bed rest and focused breathing. Sometimes that doesn't work and it becomes an Ativan day.

For you, one thing that comes to mind you could try, is reminders... like, small notes or pointers you can carry with you either on literal notes or just on your phone... short personalized statements that you can read to yourself (repeatedly if necessary) to try to counter your symptoms.

For example, "This is my body remembering, not a sign that I'm unsafe." Or, "Breathe first. Think later." Or, "It's OK that I feel this way. I'm not broken." You could also use short, supportive messages you've gotten from people you trust. Anything that goes towards reminding yourself that you're OK, it's OK, you're safe, you'll persevere. And anything that grounds you in the present moment.

This may be better suited as a preventative technique, but it could still help interrupt the spiral and limit the worsening of symptoms, even if those symptoms have already set in.

The things that soothe me, for the most part, are companionship and conversation.

You could try getting socially involved on the forum here. You're relatively new to the site, so you're probably limited in what you can do here as far as DMs, chat, etc. but those will open up as you post more. The obvious caveat being that this is a suicide forum, which I won't expound on so not to derail this thread other than to caution you against sharing personally identifying information here, even in private.

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

Crying desperately while twitching in my bed

 

[fatty44]

Hair dryer

 

[SchizoGymnast]

Bridges, sitting in car blasting the AC, weighted blanket

 

[Depressed&Stressed]

If it meets a certain severity, the only thing that brings me down from it is bed rest and focused breathing. Sometimes that doesn't work and it becomes an Ativan day.

For you, one thing that comes to mind you could try, is reminders... like, small notes or pointers you can carry with you either on literal notes or just on your phone... short personalized statements that you can read to yourself (repeatedly if necessary) to try to counter your symptoms.

For example, "This is my body remembering, not a sign that I'm unsafe." Or, "Breathe first. Think later." Or, "It's OK that I feel this way. I'm not broken." You could also use short, supportive messages you've gotten from people you trust. Anything that goes towards reminding yourself that you're OK, it's OK, you're safe, you'll persevere. And anything that grounds you in the present moment.

This may be better suited as a preventative technique, but it could still help interrupt the spiral and limit the worsening of symptoms, even if those symptoms have already set in.


You could try getting socially involved on the forum here. You're relatively new to the site, so you're probably limited in what you can do here as far as DMs, chat, etc. but those will open up as you post more. The obvious caveat being that this is a suicide forum, which I won't expound on so not to derail this thread other than to caution you against sharing personally identifying information here, even in private.

I like the note reminders "breathe first, think later" and such. I think having clear things around my home that if I begin to panic can help me think would be beneficial. Worth at shot, at least.

 

[auniqueusername!]

Crying desperately while twitching in my bed

Same lol. It's weirdly soothing just embracing the sadness. Melancholy is oddly addictive

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

Same lol. It's weirdly soothing just embracing the sadness. Melancholy is oddly addictive

It's not the melancholy, it's about wasting all your energy until you can't feel anymore.

 

[Depressed&Stressed]

Crying desperately while twitching in my bed

Man I wish I could cry. I wish I could weep loudly and twitch and hiccup and release this agony somehow.

 

[Notlikeforte]

Taking one of my prescribed Klonopin and covering myself in a blanket is my current preferred method.
If it's severe enough that I get them very frequently(like a couple times in the past) I'll go to the psych ward and hope I get an understanding psychiatrist. I know the psych ward sucks but sometimes for me it can be good to disconnect and get a different environment.

 

[helencry]

Drink, vape pen sometimes but mostly booze.

 

[hopeless302]

just endure till I get enough energy to do something else

 

[orbit]

I talk to myself about what I'm feeling as if I'm another person. It might seem a bit weird to talk to yourself out loud but honestly it's one of the best ways to process your feelings and understand what they are and where they stem from.

Hearing it actually come out of my mouth allows me to hear it in a different light, and having to think about how to formulate the sentences to explain how I'm feeling keeps me occupied. I pair this with pacing around to get a little bit of exercise in, sometimes if it's late and there's not many people out I'll pop outside and walk around the neighbourhood while quietly mumbling to myself. I know that probably makes me look crazy- but I don't really care. I'm doing what helps me and I'm not hurting anyone so they can deal with it.

If I'm actively having a panic attack I grab a weighted blanket and wrap myself up like a little burrito, the pressure helps my heart calm down a bit and usually makes me a little sleepy which makes the anxiety better to deal with. Or I grab my cat who is a little shit and will playfully attack me until I calm down. She bites and meows and doesn't let up until I've calmed down and then she'll shower me with cuddles. The annoyance of having to push away my cat so she doesn't scratch out my eyeballs is pretty funny and distracting, she knows she's helping she'll even want treats after haha

I sometimes get phantom pains from my trauma, when I get those I try to eat really spicy foods to distract myself from the pain. There's these Korean ramen noodles that are super good that my British taste buds can't handle- so I just scoff those down. This also works for panic attacks since I get all dehydrated and breathless from eating them, it forces me to drink some water and take a second to breathe.

 

[jenson]

Working out, vaping, video games, music, youtube videos. Sometimes I just tell myself the situation is my probably fault anyway and I take a whatever stance. Essentially it is what it is and won't matter soon anyway. That seems to help.

 

[sinnamonbun]

I use a lot of grounding games, being held close, focusing on my breathing, my service dog

 

[Cauliflour]

Damn you call have good methods. I just whack myself on the leg with my knife until I calm down. I also found insulting myself also works and sitting agitated while listening to weirdcore playlists from 2021 works great too.

I've just realised I don't really have panic attacks. Like I'm thinking to the last time I freaked out and like I was moreso thinking of a solution and thinking off all the different hypotheticals in the shower while being unnable to eat my dinner properly but like I was more unfocused than anything really. Why don't I freak out like you guys? Am I just so paranoid that I don't end up in these situations?