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ctb-soon

ctb-soon

Student
Jul 12, 2023
166
I wrote my suicide note. It made everything feel so real and immediate.

It made me shake.

What makes it feel real to you?
 
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saddestbunny

saddestbunny

pastebin.com/xJuaSE0j
Feb 16, 2023
203
agree on the suicide note I've been writing down reasons and stuff to do before ctb and it makes me feel happy

picking a date made it feel pretty real too
 
ctb-soon

ctb-soon

Student
Jul 12, 2023
166
agree on the suicide note I've been writing down reasons and stuff to do before ctb and it makes me feel happy

picking a date made it feel pretty real too
I agree. I find it's important to make it feel real and not just an idea in your head. I think it helps you really decide if it's a path for you.

But when I come to reasons it usually comes down to because I want to.
 
P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
12,179
It becomes real when I'm there with my method ready to go and especially when it's only "one last step" until it's done. This is when it becomes real for me.
 
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ctb-soon

ctb-soon

Student
Jul 12, 2023
166
It becomes real when I'm there with my method ready to go and especially when it's only "one last step" until it's done. This is when it becomes real for me.
What is your preferred method, and what would that "one last step" be?
 
P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
12,179
What is your preferred method, and what would that "one last step" be?
I plan to go with CO and "the last step" would be going into the room/tent filled with CO already. So then it would become real.
 
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feder

feder

I'm more scarred more scarred than my wrist is.
Apr 13, 2023
162
I wrote my suicide note. It made everything feel so real and immediate.

It made me shake.

What makes it feel real to you?
I was never good at expressing my feelings so I don't know if a note is an option.


For me it s the constant awareness of the fact that life Is meaningless and that we will never understand why are we here truly. Makes me understand that even if I don't ctb soon I will do it eventually. Either when I decide I don't want to live anymore because I'll just get older and weaker at that point or when life hits me with something I can't deal with.
 
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ctb-soon

ctb-soon

Student
Jul 12, 2023
166
I was never good at expressing my feelings so I don't know if a note is an option.


For me it s the constant awareness of the fact that life Is meaningless and that we will never understand why are we here truly. Makes me understand that even if I don't ctb soon I will do it eventually. Either when I decide I don't want to live anymore because I'll just get older and weaker at that point or when life hits me with something I can't deal with.

Yes I know the feeling about - its not if its just when. I don't put a date on things, but I do look at good opportunities like business trips where I am alone in a hotel
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
41,478
Death is certainly something very real to me as it's all we are intended for. Existing beings are just waiting to cease existing where all will be inevitably forgotten about, I see existence as just being a meaningless distraction from the fact that death is inevitable. But for me death feels like a distance a way, I sadly have no plans to escape from suffering in the near future as we exist in a world where there is a lack of acceptance towards the right to die.
 
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Sapphire

Sapphire

Student
Nov 22, 2022
186
It became real once I obtained the means for my method and started putting all my affairs in order. The idea is no longer just an idle fantasy. I know that I can go through with it anytime that I feel ready.
 
Last edited:
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ctb-soon

ctb-soon

Student
Jul 12, 2023
166
It became real once I obtained the means for my method and started putting all my affairs in order. The idea is no longer just an idle fantasy.
I relate - buying rope, a chin up bar, writing a few suicide notes and knowing what hotel you will expire in. Having emails ready to go in the future..
It all makes it real. You just need to show up for the final chapter.
 

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