Iris Blue

Iris Blue

-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-
Oct 23, 2023
226
Kind of more of me venting but:

When I was younger my mom and I got in a fight and I told her I wanted to kms with a plastic bag I had. And all she said back was "well you had enough time to do so in between me coming in your room"
 
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sserafim

sserafim

brighter than the sun, that’s just me
Sep 13, 2023
9,013
"You're just lazy."
"You don't actually want to die. If you did, you would have died already."
"If you don't like being alive, just go die then."
"Yes, no one chose to be born, but you can always choose to die."
 
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D

dggtscccvfd

Mage
Jun 1, 2023
563
"Life is precious."
 
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K

Kit1

Enlightened
Oct 24, 2023
1,099
I took a couple of overdoses and ended up in hospital for a month. My family told me not to talk about anything to the psychiatrists. When I was discharges from the local hospital, my dad took me to another hospital and told me that was was for "mad people" and if I ever opened my mouth, I will be locked up in that hospital for the rest of my life. A few weeks later, he was beating me with a belt and kept calling me "mad" and worse words. My brother told me I was made. When mum used to beat me up, she used to call me mad as well - the words they used were actually quite degrading.

I was initially abandoned at birth - technically handed over to another relatives family who passed me around. Anyway the rumour was that I was the daughter of a lady who was homeless and she was classified as being "mad" and I was known as the "mad woman's duaghter", mad girl etc and apparently children would tie stuff to me when I was very young. I think some people still remember that - but as I don't really converse with anyone from that era, I just turn a blind eye when someone sometimes say something by mistake. Also when I talked about the rape and child sexual abuse, someone mentioned that it doesn't count as I was mad. Painful.
 
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divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2024
3,268
"If you really wanted to die you would go get hit by a train"
 
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sserafim

sserafim

brighter than the sun, that’s just me
Sep 13, 2023
9,013
"If you really wanted to die you would go get hit by a train"
Mine have said this to me as well, and it's just so annoying. Everything takes effort in this world. Nothing is easy. It's even hard to die
 
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willitpass

willitpass

Don’t try to offer me help, I’ve tried everything
Mar 10, 2020
2,941
I nearly succeeded in partial when I was 13. My mom has always been extremely manipulative and abusive. It was in her garage in the middle of the night. I called my dad when the pain was too bad to continue to tell him what I did as I couldn't move my legs. He called my mother, who came into the garage and decided to help me into the car and drive a half hour to the nearest hospital because she was too cheap and didn't want to pay for an ambulance despite the fact that I very well could have a broken neck and was bleeding heavily from my nose. She then spent the whole drive to the hospital saying "you did this because you hate me didn't you?" and otherwise bitching and guilting me.
 
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divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2024
3,268
Mine have said this to me as well, and it's just so annoying. Everything takes effort in this world. Nothing is easy. It's even hard to die
Everything is way to much effort
 
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lnlybnny

lnlybnny

the art of being alone
Jan 25, 2024
531
they don't care about it, but sometimes they say absurdities like normies do ''you're beautiful and smart, why are you sad?'' this type of thing, ugh
 
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D

Dgafajwd

Member
Jan 1, 2024
62
"You're not depressed as I am, I take the highest dosage of antidepressants and am the only one in the village taking this dosage"

"You don't have the balls to do it otherwise you would already be dead"

My mum told me that she was going to kill herself by driving her car into a tree after my 1st mh appointment and told me to tell my brothers that she loved them and she's sorry she couldn't say goodbye to them properly. She didn't do anything and was attention seeking.
 
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junko

junko

carving my name in the grave again
Mar 16, 2023
77
When I was a teenager, my mom swore I'd feel better if I just got out more. Even when I was suicidal, she'd say, "you just need to get out of the house more."

And then when I tried to get out of the house, she'd either refuse to let me go, make me change my outfit 5x, or would blow up my phone with calls and texts every hour on the hour until I came home.

There's that, and then there's her telling me that I don't deserve to kill myself; that she's the only one who has the right to kill themselves.
 
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falling_snow

falling_snow

Mage
Aug 9, 2023
516
"If you want to die, then do it in front of me." She said this while holding a knife. I was 14. I never thought of any physical method, only chemical. She's really fucked up.
 
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sserafim

sserafim

brighter than the sun, that’s just me
Sep 13, 2023
9,013
"If you want to die, then do it in front of me." She said this while holding a knife. I was 14. I never thought of any physical method, only chemical. She's really fucked up.
Asian parents are fucked up. My parents have threatened to kill me (my mom says stuff like "I should just stab and kill you.") They even choked me in China last summer, but I fought back. I should have just surrendered and died lol
 
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falling_snow

falling_snow

Mage
Aug 9, 2023
516
My parents told me that if I wanted to ctb, then I could kill them. idk how should I take that.
 
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sserafim

sserafim

brighter than the sun, that’s just me
Sep 13, 2023
9,013
My parents told me that if I wanted to ctb, then I could kill them. idk how should I take that.
My mom says that she wants to kill me and then kill herself
 
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W

whywere

Illuminated
Jun 26, 2020
3,027
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L

lifewasawillowtv

You’re losing me
Nov 12, 2023
216
I took a couple of overdoses and ended up in hospital for a month. My family told me not to talk about anything to the psychiatrists. When I was discharges from the local hospital, my dad took me to another hospital and told me that was was for "mad people" and if I ever opened my mouth, I will be locked up in that hospital for the rest of my life. A few weeks later, he was beating me with a belt and kept calling me "mad" and worse words. My brother told me I was made. When mum used to beat me up, she used to call me mad as well - the words they used were actually quite degrading.

I was initially abandoned at birth - technically handed over to another relatives family who passed me around. Anyway the rumour was that I was the daughter of a lady who was homeless and she was classified as being "mad" and I was known as the "mad woman's duaghter", mad girl etc and apparently children would tie stuff to me when I was very young. I think some people still remember that - but as I don't really converse with anyone from that era, I just turn a blind eye when someone sometimes say something by mistake. Also when I talked about the rape and child sexual abuse, someone mentioned that it doesn't count as I was mad. Painful.
That is so utterly barbaric and disgusting, some people really shouldn't be allowed to give birth. I am so sorry you had to go through all of that, my parents also thought they could "beat the mental illness out of me" which arguably only made it worse. I really don't understand people's logic behind stuff like this. As if hurting you more will somehow magically make you mentally better.
 
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Tobacco

Tobacco

Efilist. Possible promortalist.
Jan 14, 2023
196
Just yesterday my mom couldn't believe I have an actually bad therapist. She bragged to me how much one helped her and she was let go after two months.
 
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EvisceratedJester

EvisceratedJester

|| What Else Could I Be But a Jester ||
Oct 21, 2023
3,642
One time my mom and I got into an argument. Eventually the argument led into me calling out her transphobia and then that eventually led to led to her threatening to slap me and banging on my door. At some point she went to reach over for my phone and seeing her so angry with her hand raised up caused me to scream in fear.

I ended up sinking to the floor, sitting in the fetal position, and her response to my reaction was to start telling me that I screamed on purpose and to start calling me ungrateful and accused me of doing it to get her in trouble. Even after I tried telling that I didn't mean to over and over again she kept on telling me that I did it on purpose and kept on shaming me. She also proceeded to rant a bit about her dad leaving her and not being apart of her childhood.

So basically, the craziest thing my mom told me would have been when she tried to accuse me of screaming on purpose and claimed that I was trying to get her in trouble. That, along with when she responded to me having issues with talking in front of my class due to anxiety by saying shit along the lines of, "I know you can do it. You're just being lazy". I ended up having three teachers between grades 6-8 who recommended that I get an IEP because of this particular issue...
 
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L

lifewasawillowtv

You’re losing me
Nov 12, 2023
216
"You just need to go outside more"
"Interacting with other people will make you feel better"
"Don't you think you sound a bit crazy?"
"Do you hear voices in your head?"
"If you want to die so badly then I'll kill you myself"
"Just pray and drink holy water, it's because you don't pray that you feel like this"
The classic "I wish you were never born" ( I was 10)

My mum and grandma also found me after a failed co attempt and their reaction was to just scream at me and be like "what the hell are u doing!!" as if they weren't the root cause of it in the first place. My dad's reaction wasn't any better. I honestly feel like I'd get further talking to a brick wall than talking to them.
 
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W

whywere

Illuminated
Jun 26, 2020
3,027
I took a couple of overdoses and ended up in hospital for a month. My family told me not to talk about anything to the psychiatrists. When I was discharges from the local hospital, my dad took me to another hospital and told me that was was for "mad people" and if I ever opened my mouth, I will be locked up in that hospital for the rest of my life. A few weeks later, he was beating me with a belt and kept calling me "mad" and worse words. My brother told me I was made. When mum used to beat me up, she used to call me mad as well - the words they used were actually quite degrading.

I was initially abandoned at birth - technically handed over to another relatives family who passed me around. Anyway the rumour was that I was the daughter of a lady who was homeless and she was classified as being "mad" and I was known as the "mad woman's duaghter", mad girl etc and apparently children would tie stuff to me when I was very young. I think some people still remember that - but as I don't really converse with anyone from that era, I just turn a blind eye when someone sometimes say something by mistake. Also when I talked about the rape and child sexual abuse, someone mentioned that it doesn't count as I was mad. Painful.
My heart broke into millions of pieces reading this. OMG my heart and soul goes out to you. My "dad" used to beat me up until I had a growth spurt and then if he hit me and floored him, gee he quit hitting me.

You are a loving and caring spirit and I wish upon the stars and my heart for you to have a better go of things and know that you are loved on here by me and so many others.

Walter

Yep, always, real 1st name
 
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Forveleth

I knew I forgot to do something when I was 15...
Mar 26, 2024
809
I told them I was suicidal and they said "We know high school is tough, college will be better." No offer of therapy, no trying to work through things with me.

I also used to sometimes cry for no reason. I know now that it was depression but back then had no idea why I would suddenly burst into tears. So, when I couldn't explain why I was crying my parents would shout at me "Then stop!" Learned to bottle my emotions and never tell anyone how I really felt.
 
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kilowatt

kilowatt

Guns don't kill people I kill people
Sep 9, 2023
377
''Did you consider what god might think?'' first words after one of my attempts.
It doesn't sound like such a big deal but that line had a massive impact on me. My mother always tried pushing religion onto me and I couldn't hate it more.
 
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littlelungs

littlelungs

Wizard
Oct 21, 2018
634
There's lots of generational trauma in my family, so my parents aren't the most emotionally healthy people in the world (albeit in very different ways from one another) and I heard quite a few zingers over the years, but the ones that stuck with me the most regarding mental health were said by my dad, such as when I was 11 and he told me how much of a burden I was to everybody because of my anxiety and said "Shame on you!" over and over again while I was having an anxiety attack, and that time he told me to just kill myself already – "Don't try, just fucking do it already!" He also got really irritated with me for telling my stepmom that I wanted to kill myself when I was 13, because apparently it was "bad timing". Sorry that my suicidal thoughts aren't more convenient?

Not sure if in-laws count, but an honourable mention would be when my MIL said to me regarding my C-PTSD, "What traumatized you isn't happening to you right now, so you should just live in the moment and be happy!" Not how C-PTSD works at all, but okay.
 
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bugs_for_brains

bugs_for_brains

We can always regroup on the moon <3
Mar 4, 2024
88
my nan was angry with me when I was 11 and told me if I wanted to die so bad she'd give me all of her pills and sit with me (sounds quite nice but she was yelling and the context made it worse) and she is my favorite person so its tough to deal with those types of things she said even now
 
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Teary01

Teary01

Member
Jan 19, 2024
7
Gotta remember the nights of just me crying led to my dad beating the shit out of me until I stopped.
 
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whywere

Illuminated
Jun 26, 2020
3,027
Gotta remember the nights of just me crying led to my dad beating the shit out of me until I stopped.
My heart ached reading this.

You are a lovely soul and noone has the right to hit another human period. When I was growing up, my "dad" used me as a punching bag, till I had a growth spurt and hit him back and he stopped.

Lots of hugs, love and the knowledge that you are loved here.

Walter
 
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february in alaska

february in alaska

wandering aimlessly
Sep 13, 2023
465
When I was 12, my mom found out I was self harming. I was mostly doing it as a cry for help at that point, so honestly I was kind of relieved. I remember SO CLEARLY she brought it up on a car ride home, laughed, and then offered to buy me more razors

I don't know if she was joking or what, but I was pretty devastated. I NEVER had to hide my SH growing up. I could walk around with bandages up and down my arms, bruises, new scars every day. No one ever said a word
 
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MortalityScares

MortalityScares

Here for perspective.
Mar 28, 2024
33
Idk if this counts but my own Mother has threatened to "kill herself" multiple times over small things. Heavily quoted because I am pretty sure my Mom's crazy to say the least. She is not actually suicidal! She genuinely just says this to make people feel bad and take advantage of them.
She is also very jealous of me whenever I find love, she's told me herself that I am not allowed to partake in marriage before she does. And of course, like all horrible parents, she has neglected me as well as physically/verbally abused me throughout my life. The abuse only stopped when I was around 15. The neglect is ongoing, as I am still under her roof unfortunately. (Though I can fend for myself now that I'm older)

When I was younger I felt bad and wanted to obey her because obviously, I thought she was serious and "Had a good point"(?? I was young to be fair). But the reality is, she was simply guilt tripping me into apologizing and doing things for her, when I really didn't need to. I don't know whats up with her in terms of the jealousy aspect, but I guess all of her previous relationships failed.. and not because of me.. so... yeah.

There has been times where I have spoken to her own Mom (My Grandma) about this and she really doesn't know what went wrong with my Mom (With all due respect). She'd been using the "I'll kill myself!" as an excuse since she was in her teens.

Anyways. I think this has seriously fucked me up personally. It took me a while to get over it for the most part, but I still struggle with trying not to please people who genuinely don't deserve it to this day. I hope this makes sense lol
 
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3/4Dead

3/4Dead

Peace, Love, Empathy
Feb 27, 2024
413
after i told my mother about my SA and she threatened to kill me (long story but its what it sounds like) I picked up a knife and got ready to slit my wrists and she mocked me, told me to do it. I froze up so hard i couldn't go through with it.
 
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