What I really want after death: A crazy twist that explains your suffering.

[cait_sith]

Like many I expect there to be nothing after death but one thing that I would really be thankful for would be before entering my well-deserved nothingness there would be a friendly Morgan-freeman-kind-of character appearing in front of me in a white suit on a cloud just explaining to me calmly why I was born this way, why I had to suffer so much, what purpose my suffering had iin a kind of like satisfying mind-fuck explanation that makes me slap my forehead and say "ohhh, no way, so this is why I had to be born". There would be no point being angry as it was all over and everything gets explained to me by a character that has no part in creation. If you read Huruki Murakamis "Hard boiled wonderland" I want that kind of twist where everything falls into place in the end, like the world itself wasn't even real in the end, like the earth experienced is just a a neuron of a galactic turtles brain, and said world was especially built around predetermined pitfalls set for me, and all the bad things that happen to me happened so that the neuron gets fueled by the energy my suffering caused, or something like that. And the whole thing would be so ridiculous that I wouldn't be angry, like i would be if it turns out there really is some kind of evil god that punishes people even after life. it would be kind of a reward for having gone through life before your consciousness would get neutralized. Would you like something like that too?

 

[identity0]

I agree, that would be wonderful. I want to understand this reality so badly, my brain seeks it so much. I havent heard of Hard Boiled Wonderland, I will try to remember it if i were to somehow gain energy to read again one day

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yes, definitely- especially if there is anything more, I want a few things straightened out.

I really want some 'fun facts' about my life too- you walked this many miles, you drank this many olympic sized swimming pools, you saw this many blackbirds, you listened to this song the most. Obviously, all useless information but, I'd be curious.

I love the idea of it being Morgan Freeman.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

That makes no sense at all since there is no reason for us to suffer. There just isn't

 

[NoPoint2Life]

That would be kind of cool actually. For me, my main thing is was there some kind of trauma in my past that I have forgotten about and repressed. Sometimes I think it must be the only cause of my OCD because it came out of nowhere when I was an adult.
And I'd love to know if I would have been different if I wasn't an only child. I think growing up alone also had a big impact on me.