What attempts have you survived?

[BigNarkoleptic]

How did you feel after?

 

[Into The Void]

Cut myself in the bathtub, just ended up with some scars and spent a week in the hospital under 24/7 surveillance. Put a bag over my head, SI kicked in.

Edit: Though if I tried now, I'm 110 percent confident I would succeed in attaining a peaceful death.

 

[Trisolaris]

Many attempts with partial hanging. Felt disappointed, frustrated, and trapped. Still do. I've contemplated jumping from the ninth floor a lot but I wouldn't count that as an attempt.

 

[Xdyzine]

3 story jump while drunk hurt my back and nothing else. Around 150 3 mg pills of benzos with alcohol woke up dazed that's about it. Recent was 20 pills of benzos and about a full bottle of whiskey, decided to drink grouting cement with it annnd you guessed it nothing happened other then stomach upset for a day. Someone seriously doesn't want me to die/get injuries . No hospitals, no one knowing even in my drunken stupor I leave no evidence.

 

[whywere]

1st time, the rope broke and I fell and was mad and disappointed. the 2nd time, did not get all that far as the cops busted in my flat and grabbed me and walked me to the emt's van. On the 2nd attempt I was very mad at the cops, as one said something to the effect, "well at least he is stillbreathing, do not like finding them after wards" and he looked at another cop with a smirk on his face. Oh and the court system after the 2nd attempt, that is for another posting someday. Walter

 

[spiritedaway]

a few attempts by partial suspension, SI saved me every time.
i tried to ingest a ton of boric acid once, but i just ended up in the hospital bc my bf found me
i tried full suspension and the rope broke

i felt shitty afterwards for all of my attempts bc i wish i just died

 

[yeahwellso]

well at least he is stillbreathing, do not like finding them after wards" and he looked at another cop with a smirk on his face.

He said that to cope. A lot of people who regularly face dreary situations in their work cope by minimizing and joking.

Even though it was upsetting for you to hear, it didn't really have anything to do with you. He was unable to keep his emotions completely silent – in this case the sense of relief.

 

[BigNarkoleptic]

He said that to cope. A lot of people who regularly face dreary situations in their work cope by minimizing and joking.

Even though it was upsetting for you to hear, it didn't really have anything to do with you. He was unable to keep his emotions completely silent – in this case the sense of relief.

Sounds like a lil social anxiety probably on behalf of the cop

 

[SuicidallyCurious]

I am a member who has never attempted CTB and never come close. The farthest I have gone is to procure the method this year. In an extended pandemic scenario I probably would have used it and I may yet still.

 

[Mentalmick]

Survived diabetes suicide.
Survived cut left wrist.
Survived cut left elbow.
Survived starvation.

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

Fucked around with a knife once, I was in a completely fucked state of mind and had no information. I had the sense to use a clean blade so everything healed without any treatment, at least. Have some scars on one arm and a mark on my leg from the stab wound, the scars could be explained away as a cat scratching me, since it sort of looks like that's what happened. Thinking about covering it up with a tattoo, lol.

 

[ansiedad]

I survived to my unique attempt.
Partial hanging. Im not strong enought.
Now Im thinking in a F OD, but I dont know if I have for a lethal dose...

 

[IcyBat]

2 x unconscious and trip to er with multiple days induced coma after prescription overdose.

1. Time was doxepin, promethazine, diazepam and escitalopram

2. Time was lithium and promethazine

 

[LifeQuitter2018]

I've made total 2 attempts in the past:

- Tried full suspension hanging => the rope was broken.
- Tried detergent suicide with bathroom cleaners => it's too painful for me. I stayed in the bathroom for 3 - 4 mins then backed out. Was hard to breath. I think it was suffocation. Coughed non-stop in my room. Slept to morning.

 

[Bedrock48]

Survived way too many, latest was yet another caffeine overdose (this was like 10 days ago so still recovering). Worst one to date, both in amount and how it affected me.

24 hours straight vomiting at least every half hour. Room spinning, everything took on a sepia colour for some reason. Vomited so much I became potassium deficient and lost the ability to walk so I was dragging myself around for a few hours. Ended up calling an ambulance because I'd had enough. Totally screwed my stomach so I have a month long course of meds to fix that.

Initially, just glad to be under someone else's care. Angry and a little jealous of those who just find themselves in comas after attempts lmao. Then, once I started feeling better in hospital I just wanted to try again. The cannulas they used weren't ones I could mess with so no luck attempting in hospital. Still wish I hadn't called an ambulance although that wasn't how I wanted anyone to find me. I'm very tired of attempting.

 

[loopylou]

Amitriptiline- pretty hungover

 

[WornOutLife]

Partial and OD with 100 different pills.
I felt terrible both times and the last one was hell because I lost my freedom for half a year.

 

[it's_all_a_game]

I tried to get hit by a train last year, was too scared at the very last minute. I also tried to drown & get hit by a car when I was in 9th grade, but of course those didn't work.

 

[Cashewmilk]

An iron pill and other random pill overdose at 14, that one landed me in the hospital to get my stomach pumped and in the psych ward for a few months, I remember literally shitting just iron and water was coming out of my ass, no poop or brown or nothing, just clear water with tons of little tiny iron flakes. I was on iron supplements for anemia and since then my mom was traumatized and never let me have iron supplements again, and now I'm so weak and I can't even take it now because of my gastro issues and IBS, so I'm perpetually weak and fatigued. When I was 12 I used to try and suffocate myself in my hoodie at school because I just hated life so much and was dreading adulthood... if that iron overdose wasn't so painful and gross I wish I would have just died that day. Since then it's been 18 years and I've done a ton of partial which never ever worked, and methadone OD's and other drug OD's which never work, it's like my body was able to handle so many drugs that would have killed most people, my druggie friends were worried I'd die in their apartment and they were shocked that I was using 12 points of heroin, plus so much crack in just the afternoon. I'm still addicted to heroin/fent now and it's smoking, no IV never tried it never could get the needle working with my weak ass hand - besides I prefer smoking all my drugs anyway, I'm still miserable but drugs are the only thing that give me happiness and relief. I only do the opiates now, no more other drugs for me. It's not only drugs and mental illness, I also get abused and bullied daily by my family, even my drug addicted family members.

 

[Ennail]

I did a lot stupid things what not working
3 times a take a overdosis. Last try i was find by a policehelicopter.
A lot of walks to the overpass. But nurse come after me and i fighter there with them.
2 times i try the train. But police was already called because i escaped from the ward.
1 time i took stanley knifes but the nurse felt that i act strange so she called the docter. I was admitted to the hospital and got a sergery.

 

[bad luck]

200mg of diazepam. They took me to the hospital. They did not wash my stomach and although it seems incredible I did not sleep. They could have poked me something and then drip. I remember everything, I was conscious at all times. They took my blood pressure, blood samples. When I spoke with the doctor she told me that it had already been time for a wash. I repeat it again, I did not fall asleep the whole night I spent in the observation room. I even took the IV syringe out of my hand but they noticed and put it back on me. I spent the night listening to the automatic blood pressure monitor and the heart constants. Then, in a mental hospital at night, I fell asleep. I think I had such an adrenaline reaction that the overdose could have been reversed. Sometimes if I'm angry, diazepam won't work for me. Now I take diazepam and zolpidem to sleep.

 

[readyforsleep]

2 x unconscious and trip to er with multiple days induced coma after prescription overdose.

1. Time was doxepin, promethazine, diazepam and escitalopram

2. Time was lithium and promethazine

Can I ask how much doxepin?

 

[nightnightnitrite]

A partial hanging last November. Passed out long enough to piss myself and when I came too again, almost overcame my SI but it was too strong. Would have succeeded if I was under the influence and couldn't get the rope off. Still a oddly pleasant way to go, would try again if I didn't just obtain SN.

 

[rotten]

I tried hanging when I was about 13. I had no idea what I was doing though so I just ended up falling to the ground. Afterwards I felt embarrassed cause I thought I was to stupid to be successful.

 

[readyforsleep]

1st attempt: Tried slitting wrist and taking a bunch of asprin w/ alcohol. Felt awful after but nothing happened b/c I didn't tell anyone. My arm didn't move right for a while but it's fine now.
2nd: tried SN method the taste made me throw up instantly, told psychiatrist and ended up involuntarily hospitalized for 10 days.
3rd: took 11 sleeping pills and tried to drown in the bath ended up involuntarily hospitalized for a month

IMO the worst feeling in the world is realizing that you've just failed at ctb, that's the only thing that's kept me from a 4th yet but things are really bad rn so I think I'm going to try again soon.

 

[RedHarlequin]

OD on different sleeping pills when I was around 13. Then partial where I couldn't find my sweet spot and ended up just blocking my windpipe. I felt extremely sad and trapped. Good thing for me nobody found out about these so I've never been involuntarily hospitalized or dealt with police.

 

[Taos]

1st attempt: Tried slitting wrist and taking a bunch of asprin w/ alcohol. Felt awful after but nothing happened b/c I didn't tell anyone. My arm didn't move right for a while but it's fine now.
2nd: tried SN method the taste made me throw up instantly, told psychiatrist and ended up involuntarily hospitalized for 10 days.
3rd: took 11 sleeping pills and tried to drown in the bath ended up involuntarily hospitalized for a month

IMO the worst feeling in the world is realizing that you've just failed at ctb, that's the only thing that's kept me from a 4th yet but things are really bad rn so I think I'm going to try again soon.

As for No. 3. I wanted to combine pills of some kind + drowning in shallow water, not bath. Why didn't it work? SI or did someone hear you?

 

[readyforsleep]

As for No. 3. I wanted to combine pills of some kind + drowning in shallow water, not bath. Why didn't it work? SI or did someone hear you?

I don't remember it super clearly but I think it was a combination of SI and not being capable of completing any action (suicidal or otherwise) because I was just in such a bad place mentally I couldn't really think