I had this thought when I meet my family. Especially when my grandmother is around. I think her life-quality would be way worse if she had no children. Her husband is already dead. I think the loneliness can be pretty torturous when you are old. This is one reason why I hope I die young. The solitude in homes of aged is sometimes heartbreaking. During covid many people died in complete loneliness without saying goodbye to their loved ones. But it must even hurt more if you have no loved ones.
Most children feel obliged to care for their old parents. It is sometimes quite hypocritical. Sometimes they only want to inherit their money.
It is quite a selfish reason but I think having children when you are very old can kind of comfort you. You think your life had a meaning because now your relatives live on. My grandma told me some months ago I shall remember her when she dies. She might don't have much time to live anymore.
Though I think this reason for pro-creating is kind of selfish. I think in my family noone is self-aware or reflective enough to understand why pro-creating might be a bad idea if you are totally fucked. Especially my other grandma the bipolar one should have never pro-created. But she is already dead for a long time ago. I protect my other grandma from my suicidal thoughts. She also did not stop the child abuse. But she is old and I don't want to hurt her. She could die soon and I don't want an argument to be our last conversation.
I think it can feel good to pro-create. Because our brain and hormones are programmed to pursue pro-creation. It can be a life-changing experience to hold your own baby in your arms. But it did not stop my mom from abusing her children. I think many people see it as the meaning of life to pro-create. Many people have the wish: As long as my children have it better than me I am okay to experience my whole fucked up life and all the suffering.
Though most people don't get that this promise is almost impossible to give. I think pro-creating can be kind of playing russian roulette. There are so many painful conditions, diseases and so much more. So much violence and abuse. Though I think it depends on the life circumstances. Some children have better preconditions than others. But I think most children in this world are born under horrible circumstances.
The advantage of pro-creating is: yourself can feel better. Some/Most children are even glad that they are born. But for me playing russian roulette always feels irresponsible.
Personally I absolutely don't want to pro-create. I fear loneliness. I think there probably will be a dichotomy between my friends. The ones who pro-create and the ones who don't. I think it can shape your worldview. Parenthood can demand a lot of energy. Yeah I think my friends will have way less time. I am kind of scared about that. I wish my friends would not pro-create. But I have stopped to tell them about antinatalism. They should make a decision which feels good for them and not for me. Some people regret they don't have pro-created when they are old.
What do you think are good arguments for pro-creation? Maybe you can find some which don't sound as selfish as mine?
Most children feel obliged to care for their old parents. It is sometimes quite hypocritical. Sometimes they only want to inherit their money.
It is quite a selfish reason but I think having children when you are very old can kind of comfort you. You think your life had a meaning because now your relatives live on. My grandma told me some months ago I shall remember her when she dies. She might don't have much time to live anymore.
Though I think this reason for pro-creating is kind of selfish. I think in my family noone is self-aware or reflective enough to understand why pro-creating might be a bad idea if you are totally fucked. Especially my other grandma the bipolar one should have never pro-created. But she is already dead for a long time ago. I protect my other grandma from my suicidal thoughts. She also did not stop the child abuse. But she is old and I don't want to hurt her. She could die soon and I don't want an argument to be our last conversation.
I think it can feel good to pro-create. Because our brain and hormones are programmed to pursue pro-creation. It can be a life-changing experience to hold your own baby in your arms. But it did not stop my mom from abusing her children. I think many people see it as the meaning of life to pro-create. Many people have the wish: As long as my children have it better than me I am okay to experience my whole fucked up life and all the suffering.
Though most people don't get that this promise is almost impossible to give. I think pro-creating can be kind of playing russian roulette. There are so many painful conditions, diseases and so much more. So much violence and abuse. Though I think it depends on the life circumstances. Some children have better preconditions than others. But I think most children in this world are born under horrible circumstances.
The advantage of pro-creating is: yourself can feel better. Some/Most children are even glad that they are born. But for me playing russian roulette always feels irresponsible.
Personally I absolutely don't want to pro-create. I fear loneliness. I think there probably will be a dichotomy between my friends. The ones who pro-create and the ones who don't. I think it can shape your worldview. Parenthood can demand a lot of energy. Yeah I think my friends will have way less time. I am kind of scared about that. I wish my friends would not pro-create. But I have stopped to tell them about antinatalism. They should make a decision which feels good for them and not for me. Some people regret they don't have pro-created when they are old.
What do you think are good arguments for pro-creation? Maybe you can find some which don't sound as selfish as mine?
