Discussion What Are Some Ways People, or Yourself, Mentally Prepare to CTB?

[SadTitan]

I know how I want to do it, but I haven't decided when, partially because the source of how still hasn't arrived in my mail yet. I'm sad I can't experience the great things I've always wanted to in my lifetime. I believe in reincarnation and when I sleep I like to dream about my next life as an orange house cat, or a physically attractive person whos mentally stable and happy. That's what I plan on thinking about when I drift off into peace.

I know some of my family will be sad that I'm gone, but I hope they can be happy for me that I've moved on and in peace. I'm saddened by the thought that I won't be around to play the games or see the movies/shows I've been excited about.

 

[momento.mori]

My preparations are always the same. My method have always been pills so I save up my prescription medication because I know I'll attempt again. The day starts out sad and I'm angry I woke up but I continue on. Something big happens and I cry all day. It's always a spontaneous decision (even though i save my pills) and I'll get the idea of just taking them all, so I quickly do it so I won't change my mind. Then I get in bed, ball up, cry and wait to die. Of course it never ends like that because I end up sick, dizzy and sometimes I vomit. Once I realize I'm not dead I just cry myself to sleep. The next day, I tell myself I can Conquer this because God didn't let me die and I'm here for a reason and I have a positive attitude, until the next big crash and I repeat.

 

[SilverTiger]

This is just my preperation, this is by no means what I reccomend to others, but if it works for you, then so be it
For reference, I am 26, going 27 in Nov, I plan to die sometime next year.

1. Lose weight, so I can die in a more feminine body.
2. Read the Tibetan Book of the Dead (I have always wanted to do this)
3. Check notes for partner and best friend (Even now I am trying to write this, to effectivly convey my emotions.)

These are my mental preperations...

 

[AllTheWay]

I just think about my life and how it would be if I stayed. shit will only get worse and worse, and ill suffer even more every day. It just reminds me why I shouldn't stay. The very little satisfaction I get out of life does not outweigh the pain and exhaustion of being here. My only satisfaction I get is when I get high and drunk and am out of it, sitting here like a zombie. If that's all I have to look forward to, then I'd rather just be gone.

 

[UKscotty]

I think we have to let go of everything connecting us to the future if we are truly serious and ready.

The job needs to go, friend and family ties need to go, no more holding onto money etc.

If we have thoughts like, 'what if', 'what about this and that' etc etc.

No concern for 'failed attempt ' as there is no such thing as a failed attempt if we are ready, we just keep going until we are dead.

Everything has to go. Can't give the SI a thing to latch onto.

 

[LaughingGoat]

Kind of a shot in the dark but do you have any chance to be around a dead body like a funeral home. Seeing dead bodies in person, the absoluteness of death where you see that people are just flesh and bone once they're dead and everything they were in life is gone immediately is certainly eye-opening.

 

[gantaigarashi]

By sourcing all the materials required to CTB. And researching how to source them if I don't have any materials.

At the end of the day it's my method that's going to help me CTB, without it no matter what philosophical thought I have to cope, it won't matter.

Since I have SN, benzos, and anti emetics. I'm thinking whatever I want till I reach the D-Day to CTB

 

[mehdone]

Kind of a shot in the dark but do you have any chance to be around a dead body like a funeral home. Seeing dead bodies in person, the absoluteness of death where you see that people are just flesh and bone once they're dead and everything they were in life is gone immediately is certainly eye-opening.

Eh, as a mortician I can say that this doesn't help, I've been around a lot of dead people.

There really isn't any preparation, other than getting your affairs in order.

It is simply a matter of overcoming SI- and either you are ready, or you are not. If you are not- you will back out in some way. If you are ready, you will either succeed, or fail due to bad planning.

This is all simply my humble opinion based off of my own experience- and I'm still breathing, so I'm obviously not an expert on ctb.

 

[LaughingGoat]

Eh, as a mortician I can say that this doesn't help, I've been around a lot of dead people.

There really isn't any preparation, other than getting your affairs in order.

It is simply a matter of overcoming SI- and either you are ready, or you are not. If you are not- you will back out in some way. If you are ready, you will either succeed, or fail due to bad planning.

This is all simply my humble opinion based off of my own experience- and I'm still breathing, so I'm obviously not an expert on ctb.

That's fair and I'm sure it is different for each individual. Regarding getting over SI, I think there is a lot more to be said about mindset and how people can prepare in that sense than just doing it or not. I've seen people attempt suicide without an ounce of hesitation and having known them in a clinical setting, their concrete mindset on death was generally quite different than a lot of other people with suicidal ideation.